


Queen

by enamoured_x



Series: Queen Series [1]
Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Blood and Violence, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Hate to Love, Mutual Pining, Romance, Slow Burn, Strong Female Characters, Swearing, Violence, like really slow burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2020-09-05 19:08:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 53,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20278324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enamoured_x/pseuds/enamoured_x
Summary: "Hello, princess.""It's Queen to you."





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My Bellamy Blake fanfic that is on Wattpad and I decided to swing it over here! This one is a really slow burn but it's definitely worth it. I hope you enjoy! :)

_"What makes earth feel like hell is our expectation that it should feel like heaven."_

**1.**

  
  


My boots pound against the steel floors as I pump my legs to go faster. Beads of sweat running down my face. I hear the guards hot on my tail which pushes me to run faster. I couldn't let them catch me, I'm only 16 they would put me in the box for 2 years and review my crime at 18. And there's no way they would let this one slide. No way in hell. 

I can't help but think this would never of happened if Jack would've kept his mouth shut, I should've known though. He was a member of the guard, he didn't care about me like he claimed. But that was obvious for other reasons. He was just using me this whole time and when he found out what I was doing he snitched. But that wasn't what was going to get me in huge trouble. It was that I had killed two guards in the process. I'm so dead.  
  


That was just a haunting memory now, I had ran into a dead end and they had me trapped. I got put into the box and that was the end of it. Until now, I'm 17 soon to be 18 in two weeks. I know they are going to float me, to be honest it scares the hell out of me everyday. But I did what I had to do.

A clicking sound snapped me out of my thoughts and I turned to see my cell door opening.

"Prisoner 636 stand against the wall, hands behind your back." One of the two guards who were now in my cell ordered.

"What's in it for me?" I joked. They didn't find it too funny.

"Now." I saw his hand resting on his taser stick and walking closer to me.

"You touch me and you're dead just like the other two." I smiled up at him and for a second his eyes flashed with fear. But it went quickly and he gained his composure.

"I'm going to say this-" I cut him off by punching him square in the jaw and knocking him to the floor. The other guard tried to grab me as I tried running out of the cell so I slammed his head into the wall and kneed him in the gut. I guess having an ex boyfriend who was on the guard came in handy sometimes. I ran out the cell and it was chaos. Guards were leading all the other prisoners out of their cells. Some were resisting and some were just plain knocked out.

"T!" I whip my head to see Monty with his hands behind his back and a guard leading him my way.

"What's happening?" I ask him.

"I don't know." He looks worried and I can't help but think that they are going to float us all to save their asses.

"You're going to the ground, sweetheart." My heart stopped and I turned to see Jack standing in front of me. The ground? Before I could say anything, let alone think, I felt a sting in my wrist and one in my neck. Everything went blurry and then black.

A jolt woke me up and I hit my head against the back of my seat I was in making my head pound even more then it already was. I take in my surroundings and notice I'm on a drop ship among all the other prisoners. Jack wasn't lying, we really are being sent to the ground.

"Good morning, sunshine." I focus my eyes and see Monty again but this time Jasper is sitting right next to him. I smile despite the circumstance.

"Jasper! I've missed you!"

"I've missed you too, T." I grin widely at my nickname. Jasper and Monty have been my best friends since we were little. Although, we grew up in different stations we still saw each other all the time because their parents were friends with my parents. They actually got locked up before me and I haven't seen them since I was 15.

We all hear a weird noise and I realize that it was the atmosphere.  
"So the rumors are true. We're going to earth." Jasper says.

The TV monitors turn on above our heads and everyone looks up.

"Prisoners of The Ark, hear me now. You've been given a second chance. As your Chancellor it is my hope that you see this as not just a chance for you but a chance for all of us, indeed for mankind itself." Chancellor Jaha starts to speak and I continue to watch.

"We have no idea what is waiting for you down there. If the odds of survival were better, we would've sent others. Frankly, we're sending you because your crimes have made you expendable."   
I roll my eyes at his comment. Expendable? Really? 

A male voice speaks out, "Your dad's a dick, wells." Wells? Why in the hell is he here? Just as I thought the chancellor couldn't get anymore cruel. He sends his own son down here, talk about daddy issues. Had some of my own though.

I choose to drown out his voice and lean my head back against the seat.

"Spacewalk bandit strikes again. Go, Finn! Check it out!" I hear someone yell and I lift my head up to see a guy with dark brown shaggy hair floating in the air. What a dumbass, he's going to get himself killed once we enter earths atmosphere. I've heard about Finn numerous times. He wasted two months of oxygen for an illegal spacewalk, I didn't get the point of why he did it. I didn't find space interesting at all. It's hell up here. At least when you're living on the Ark.

"Your dad floated me after all." He says to Wells while crossing his arms. I couldn't help but laugh at that.

"You should strap in before the parachutes deploy." Wells warned him. I couldn't imagine what would happen if he was still floating around when they opened up. I guess I spoke too soon because all of a sudden the ship jolted and Finn and the two other idiots who followed him went flying into some pipes making them bust open with steam. Everyone was freaking out, I'm guessing the parachutes must have deployed. All of a sudden the noise stopped and everyone got quiet.

"Listen, no machine hum." Monty said.

"Whoa, that's the first." Jasper looked at him in awe. 

"Rough landing." I huff throwing my head back.

"The outer door is on the lower level, let's go." A voice called out. I unbuckled my seat belt and got up along with everyone.   
  


"Hey, just back it up guys." I see a tall man with slicked back black hair standing by the door and the handle. He's very attractive. But he's also part of the guard, clearly I have a type... I wasn't digging his hair too much. He has a tan complexion with freckles lining his cheeks and dark brown eyes. Who is he?

"Stop! The air could be toxic!" A girl known as Clarke called out. She use to help her mother out in the medical wing, the only reason I know that is because I use to help my father in the medical wing as well.  
  


"If the air is toxic we're all dead anyway." He did have a point, we wouldn't have enough air in here.

"Bellamy?" A petite girl with long brown hair cut through the crowd to get to him. 

"My god, look how big you are." He smiled as did she.

Monty, Jasper and I watched the exchange in front of us and stayed quite.   
  


"What the hell are you wearing? A guards uniform?" She looks in disgust at his attire and I let out a little laugh.

"I borrowed it to get on the drop ship. Someone has got to keep an eye on you." I stand back along with everyone else in confusion.

"Where's your wristband?" Clarke interrupts their exchange.

"Do you mind? I haven't seen my brother in a year." What? No one has a brother. As if someone read my mind a guy speaks out.

"No one has a brother!"

"That's Octavia Blake the girl they found hidden in the floor." I've heard rumors but never knew if they were true or not. So that's the infamous Octavia. Octavia charges towards the girl in anger but Bellamy holds her back.

"Octavia, Octavia no. Let's give them something else to remember you by." 

"Yeah? Like what?" She questions her big brother and he smirks.

"Like being the first person on the ground in a hundred years." 

"Ninety seven!" I cough and Bellamy glares at me as I smile sweetly. Octavia grins as he pulls down on the lever. Well, here goes nothing. As the drop ship door drops a light shines through making me squint and hold up a hand to my eyes to block it. It dies down and soon we are met with a forest of tall green trees and colorful flowers. The warm sun still seeps in through the tree branches and it looks beautiful.   
Octavia slowly walks down the ramp turning her head every which way to take it all in. Finally she jumps down on the dirt. We all are silent watching her; waiting. For what? I don't know.

"We're back bitches!" She throws her hands into the air and everyone runs out. That's what we were waiting for. I step down and breathe it in. It smells amazing, for the first time I smell fresh air. For the first time I feel the sun on my skin. I close my eyes and enjoy it for a moment. After a few seconds I open them up and look around. I see lots of people gathered to my right so I decide to walk over to where all the commotion was going on with Clarke.   
  


"Hey, hey, hey, hands off of him. He's with us." I hear Murphy call to Wells. From what I've gathered Wells pushed jasper. What a bitch. And since when has Murphy ever even talked to Jasper?

"Relax. We're just trying to figure out where we are." Well tells them not trying to cause a huge scene. Too late.   
Bellamy walks up and chimes in, "We're on the ground. That not good enough for you?" 

"We need to find Mount Weather. You heard my father's message. That has to be our first priority." Wells explained looking at all us.

"What, you think you're in charge here, you and your little Princess?"Bellamy questions. 

"Do you think we care who's in charge? We need to get to Mount Weather not because the Chancellor said so, but because the longer we wait, the hungrier we'll get and the harder this'll be. How long do you think we'll last without those supplies? We're looking at a twenty-mile trek, okay? So if we want to get there before dark, we need to leave now." I have to admit Clarke has a way with words, I was almost hooked as well as the whole camp. Some were nodding with her speech and some were rolling their eyes.

"I got a better idea. You two go find it for us. Let the privileged do the hard work for a change." Bellamy smirked and everyone went crazy with shouts.

"You're not listening. We all need to go." Wells groaned in annoyance. 

"Look at this, everybody... The Chancellor of Earth." Murphy held his hands out laughing at Wells and causing some snickers from the crowd. I don't think I'm going to like this Murphy kid. Wells isn't his father so no one has any reason to hate him for what his father does. 

"Think that's funny?" Wells spat angrily.   
They both started going at each other while everyone started to gather around cheering; desperate to see a fight. Before any more damage could happen Finn jumped down from the top of the dropship.

"Kids got one leg, why don't you wait till it's a fair fight?" Finn speaks to Murphy and Murphy rolls his eyes and backs away.

"Hey, space walker, rescue me next." Octavia shouts to Finn and now it's my turn to roll my eyes.   
Everyone clears out and I'm close enough to hear Bellamy's and Octavia's conversation.

"What? He's cute." She says and I laugh quietly.

"He's a criminal." Bellamy tells her.

"They're all criminals." When I hear that the realization sinks in. We all got locked up for a reason. Some kids stole, some assaulted, and some killed. Well in Octavia's case, she was born. But either way none of this can be good.

Deciding I didn't care to listen to anymore of their conversations I walked toward Finn and Clarke.

"So when are we leaving for this field trip?" I say interrupting their conversation with Wells. They look at me a little confused and I realized why.

"Oh sorry, I'm Taylor." I give a friendly smile, I need to make friends down here, I don't want to be on anyone's bad side. Although I can hold my own, like Octavia said, we're all criminals.

"Taylor Queen?" Wells asks eyeing me curiously.

"The one and only."

"You're the one who killed those two guards and-" Wells started but I interrupted. 

"So where are we headed off to?" They give me curious glances but decide to drop it, thank god. I hate talking about what I did. 

"We need to get to Mount Weather and we need to leave now." Clarke explained to me and I nodded.

"Alright, well let's get going." Wells said trying to stand up but faltering because of his injured leg.

"You're not coming." Clarke stated, they both stared at each other and I could tell there was tension there.

"Yes I am."

"No you're not."

"You three can't carry enough for 100 people." Wells had a point.

Finn looked around until he turned around and grabbed Monty and Jasper by their shoulders and brought them over.

"Fine, now let's go."

"Sounds fun, I'm in." Octavia says joining us and smiling. I look to my right to see Jasper swooning at the girl and I almost laugh.

"Just like old times, Queen." Monty said throwing his arm around my shoulder. I laugh.

Clarke pulls me to the side and whispered, "Actually Taylor, I need you to stay here. I don't trust Bellamy and we need someone to watch the camp while we're gone."

"You want me to babysit Bellamy? Why me?" I groan and cross my arms. Who even is she to tell me what to do. 

"Not babysit just keep an eye on him and I chose you because your boyfriend was Jack foster." My eyes widen at his name and I glare at her.

"What the hell does he have to do with anything?"

"I know he trained you, meaning you know how to defend yourself. We need you to stay here. Please." She begged and I knew I couldn't say no. I just don't understand how she knew he trained me. Her mom is Abby Griffin though, She's patched me and Jack up so many times from training that she probably mentioned it to Clarke.

"Fine. I'll stay." I tell her and she nods in appreciation and starts to walk away.

"Clarke. I'll keep an eye on Bellamy but keep an eye on Jasper and Monty for me, they are all I have down here." I say and she nods her head again and walks away. I see them start to gather their backpacks and walk off into the unknown.

"Hey, Taylor, we're getting stuff from the drop ship to make tents out of. You might want to take what you can before its all gone." A guy tells me. I think everyone calls him Miller but I have no idea how he knows me.

"Thank you, Miller. Where are you setting up?" He points to an area surrounded by trees off to the side away from everyone and I couldn't of picked a better spot.

"Mind if I set up over there too?" 

"Of course not, if you need help let me know." He walks away with his stuff and towards the area to set up. I walk towards the drop ship and go in, I see some parachute left over so I grab it and start ripping it apart to take enough for a decent tent. I also see some rope in the corner and some blankets thrown across the seats. I take everything in my hands and walk out toward Miller and set my stuff down a couple feet from him.

"Miller, how do you know who I am?" I ask him while we set up our tents in silence.

"You're Taylor Queen, you're a legend on my station back home." He tells me.

"You were part of the farming station, weren't you?" I ask him and he nods his head. 

"Well I wouldn't consider myself a legend so that would be great if you would never refer to me as that again. Please." I say politely.

"But-" He starts but I cut him off before he can start talking about it again.

"Please drop it, I don't want to talk about it. Now come over here and help me or else I'll be bunking with you." I joke and he laughs.

"You're not my type, Queen." I scoff and elbow him playfully. We both laugh until we get interrupted.   
  


"Miller, can I speak to you?" A voice sounds from behind us and we turn around to see Bellamy with a group of guys behind him. What are they? His little dogs?

"Sure." Miller sets the stuff down and tells me he'll be just a minute and I nod. Bellamy and Miller walk away while Murphy and the guys behind him step forward.

"Hello, princess." Murphy smirks. I scoff and roll my eyes.

"Don't call me that." I cross my arms and he smirks some more.

"Well, Queen, I see you're getting pretty close to Miller there, huh?" He says stepping toward me.

"Mind your own business, Murphy. Don't you have something better to do?" I take a quick glance to see Bellamy and Miller still talking and I turn back and look at Murphy. 

"No, but I know you were so easy to give it up to Jack I thought maybe Miller will get lucky." Murphy states and the guys bust out laughing behind him. My hand automatically clenches into a fist and I try to control myself before I do anything stupid, I have a short temper and I've been trying to work on it. I'm not that surprised he knew about Jack. Jack likes to gloat and he's an open book and will tell you anything.

"Murphy, you have five seconds to walk away." I grit through my teeth.

"Is that a threat?" He laughs and turns around to face his group.

"The bitch is trying to threaten me." He laughs and as he turns back around I bring my fist back and punch him square in his big nose. Like I said, I'm _trying_ to work on my temper. It's not going too well.  
The guys go quite behind him and Murphy touches underneath his nose. It starts to bleed and he looks down at his fingers.  
  


"You little bitch!" He yells charging at me. I quickly step away and grab his head when he comes near me and smash it on my knee and he falls to the floor groaning. All of a sudden he grabs my ankle and yanks me on the ground and punches me in the stomach. I grab his arm and twist it behind his back on the ground and get on top of him and start to throw punches to his face. I hear people yelling for me to get off but Murphy pushed me so I continue, he continues to bleed from his nose and I cut his eyebrow open. My hands are now bloody.

I feel two arms wrap around my waist and lift me off of him. I try as hard as I can to get out of the guys grip but he wasn't letting up. Finally I gave up and he let go, I turn around to see Bellamy.

"What is going on?" Bellamy looks between me and bloody Murphy getting up from the ground with help from his friends.

"We were just wrestling." I give Bellamy a grin and he glares at me.

"The bitch attacked me because of a few jokes." Murphy says spitting out blood from his mouth in the process.

"I wasn't so easy after all, was I Murphy?" I smirk at him and he sends me a glare.

"You two stay away from each other, another fight and you guys deal with me." Bellamy explains and I scoff and walk up to him.

"Who put you in charge?"

"I did, princess."

"You really want to go there, Bellamy?" I cross my arms and hold my stare.

"How cute, you think I'm scared of you. Now go do something useful." He demands and I laugh right in his face.

"Oh, Bellamy, I do not take orders from you." He looks around at the people who are watching, probably scared that I'm standing up to him when he's suppose to be seen as the leader.

"Watch it, Queen." Bellamy mutters under his breath and walks away. I roll my eyes and turn around to get back to setting up my tent.


	2. II.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd just like to comment that any spelling mistake is really a mistake, I promise I know how to spell and i do check my chapters but sometimes I really do miss things here and there. I can't tell you how much I hate when people use the wrong you're and your,, but I've sometimes found myself checking my work and seeing that I spelled the wrong you're/your and I swear it really is a mistake. Don't attack me please lol.

_"_ _Fear not death for the sooner we die, the longer we shall be immortal._ _"_

  
**2.**   
  
  


"Here, clean your hands." Miller throws me a wet piece of cloth and I immediately start scrubbing my hands.

"What did Bellamy want to talk to you about?" I ask Miller while I try to get the blood off my hands.

"He wants to start getting people to take off their wristbands."

"What?! But Clarke clearly explained to us what would happen if we take them off." I can't help but start to get angry, these wristbands are the only thing letting our people know that we're alive and it's okay to come down. My dad is up there, I don't want him to think I'm dead.

"Taylor, calm down. I'm not taking mine off and I know you're not but Bellamy seems persistent in getting everyone to take them off." As soon as Miller finished his sentence I get up and start making my way toward the drop ship. I'm going to give that jackass a piece of my mind.

"You don't want to go in there." Some kid tells me as I walk past him and start walking up the opening. I ignore him. I push the parachute tarp aside, Bellamy and the girl who was making out with him stop due to my entering. Bellamy has his shirt off and it looks like the girl was getting there. I couldn't help but stare at his body for a second longer than I should have but I remembered what I came here for and I instantly snap out of it.

"You. out." I point at her than to the drop ship entrance, she gives me a dirty look and I glare at her. She quickly walks past me and out of the ship.

"What do you think you're doing, Queen?" Bellamy grits through his teeth.

"No, Bellamy, what do you think you're doing? Why are you trying to get people to take off their wristbands?" I poke at his chest. I can't help but take a quick glance down at his toned stomach, he looked good. I shake the thought as he speaks up.

"You really want those people coming down here and locking us up all over again? I don't and you shouldn't either." I look into his eyes and I feel as if he's hiding something. Then I realized that he was wearing a guards uniform when he wasn't really part of the guard, and he didn't come from being locked up because he was older than eighteen well at least he looked older than eighteen.

"What did you do that is so bad that you don't want them to come down here?" I wait for his answers and he looks taken back by my question. He must have done something unforgivable by the counsel. 

"I did something that they would kill me for if they came down here." Did he kill someone? It's the only thing I can think of that would cause the most punishment.

"So because of what you did, we're all paying for it? Bellamy, you can't make people take off their wristbands, more than half of us have family up there." I try to get through to him but he seems to get angrier.

"I can and I will. The only person I love is down here and right now she is all I care about, I have to protect her." Bellamy explains. I can't help but think how incredibly sweet that is that he just wants to do what's best for his sister but making us pay for it in the process is selfish.

"Bellamy, I understand you want to protect Octavia but this will hurt her in the long run when we don't have our people down here to help us." I know people already look at Bellamy as some kind of leader. He's older and he's already spoken out on many things which make people believe he's who they should be following. Also the fact that he was intimidating to people as well as his little group who follows him around. I know people won't listen to me or Clarke or whoever more than they would listen to him. But I've got to do something.

"I don't have time for this." Bellamy says. He grabs his shirt and throws it on while walking out the dropship.

"If you're going to kill someone, it's probably best not to announce it." I hear Bellamy say and my spark of curiosity makes me step out of the dropship. I see Bellamy talking to Murphy and a group of guys.

"You're not really a member of the guard, are you?" Murphy asks him. I stand by them crossing my arms.

"No. The real guard will be here soon unless we stop it." Bellamy tells them and my fists clench. He obviously didn't hear a word I said.

"You don't actually think they're gonna forgive your crimes. Even if they do, then what? Guys like us, we're gonna become model citizens now. Get jobs if we're lucky, maybe pick up their trash?" He goes on, I see Murphy and the guys intrigued by what he's saying. I'll admit he knows how to talk to people, I can already tell even though I barely know him. I mean he has a group of people already following him and we only just got here.

"You got a point?" Murphy asks.

"No, I got a question. They locked you up and dumped you down here like lab rats to die. So why are you helping them?"

"The hell we are." Murphy starts to angry and I know Bellamy had got him and his boys hooked.

"You're wearing those bracelets, aren't you? Right now, those things are telling them whether or not it's safe to follow us down." Oh here we go. Bellamy catches my eye and I shake my head at him. But He looks back to Murphy.

"Okay. You said we could stop it. How?"

"Take them off. The Ark will think you're dead, that it's not safe to follow. You follow?"

"Right, and if we do, what's in it for us?"

"Someone has got to help me run things." They're going to take their wristbands off.

After watching Bellamy convince Murphy and the guys to take off their wristbands I decided I needed to get some stuff done. There were pieces of scrap metal on the floor by the dropship so I picked up some decent size chunks and I took rubber from the seats and walked back over to my now finished tent. I see Miller had finished it up for me so I made a mental note to thank him later when I see him. I go inside and sit on the floor and get to working on making my knife. I don't know what but something tells me I'm going to need protection.  
  
  


Back on the Ark the only thing I feared was getting caught for the crime I was committing. Although, I don't see it as a crime, I was doing what needed to be done. It's funny, I kind of miss looking out my cell and seeing the earth and the stars from there. I've always hated it up there but I miss the view. As much as I love earth, even after just arriving, I'm scared to find out what is really down here. I'm even more terrified of what is going to happen to us. What kind of things are down here? Maybe radiation will kill us and it's just taking it's sweet time. Maybe we will all kill each other before any natural form of death can get to us first. It's clear I can defend myself and stand up for my beliefs but I still get scared just as much as the next girl, I still fear death just as I always have when I was locked up on the ark.

Back on the ark I was just ticking down the days to when I would be floated, I mean they were going to review my crime but I had killed 2 people, to make matters worse those 2 people were on the guard. There was no way they were going to let me free. So I counted the days. Countdowns are suppose to be fun, especially countdowns to your birthday but my birthday was also the day I was going to die. The irony of it is really funny actually, I guess I can laugh about it now since i'm down here. But death can still be lurking around the corner. Death is inevitable yet I fear it the most.   
  
  
  


It's dark out now and I start to question how long I was in my tent for. None of that mattered now though since all hell was breaking loose again. I walk out of my tent. 

"What the hell are you doing?" Wells shouts at Bellamy. Behind them I see Murphy breaking a girls wristband and seeing it fall to the floor. I also take notice of many people are surrounding them with no wristbands and people who seem to be waiting in line to get them cut off. I take a few deep breaths trying to calm myself before I do something bad. I walk up to them and stand by Wells in front of the fire.

"We're liberating ourselves. What does it look like?" Bellamy raises his hands and the crowd cheers. I walk up to Bellamy and shove him. Everyone shuts up immediately and watches.

"Oh look, the princess is here." Bellamy laughs and I hear some snickers.

"Stop this. Now, Bellamy." I demand and he laughs again. I really want to punch that smile off his face.

"You think this is a game?" Wells stands by my side to talk to Bellamy.

"Those aren't just our friends and our parents up there. They're our farmers, our doctors, our engineers." He explains and then faces the crowd.

"I don't care what he tells you. We won't survive here on our own, and besides, if it really is safe, how could you not want the rest of our people to come down?" Wells has a good argument, I hope people will get their heads out of their asses and listen. I know Bellamy isn't letting up though as he goes to speak, "My people already are down. Those people locked my people up. Those people killed my mother for the crime of having a second child. Your father did that." He points a finger at Wells.

"My father didn't write the laws." Wells told him.

"No. He enforced them but not anymore, not here. Here, there are no laws." As soon as Bellamy finishes his sentence everyone breaks out into cheers and Murphy continues to take people's wristbands off.

"Here, we do whatever the hell we want whenever the hell we want. Now, you don't have to like it, Wells. You can even try to stop it or change it, kill me. You know why? Whatever the hell we want." Bellamy smirks and everyone gets riled up again.

"Whatever the hell we want!" Everyone starts chanting. I turn and see Murphy is still breaking people's wristbands off. I walk up to him, he's totally asking for it.

"Murphy, if you want to live I suggest you stop." I grit through my teeth and he looks up and smirks.

"You can't stop me, princess." He laughs and I pretend like I'm going to turn around but instead I turn back towards him and punch him in the cheek where his cut from our previous fight was.

"You bitch!" Murphy shouts and I punch him again harder making him fall to the floor knocked out. 

"Queen! You can't just punch someone every time you don't agree with them." Bellamy says grabbing my shoulder.

"Oh, Bellamy, I'm just doing whatever the hell I want." I smile at him sweetly and walk past him hitting his shoulder with mine.

All of a sudden it starts raining and I stop walking and look up and open my arms to the rain. It feels amazing on my skin and it smells so fresh. At least something good came out of this day.  
  
  
  
  


"Let her go! You can stop this!" I hear Wells voice through my tent waking me up. It's too early for more fighting, I want to go back to sleep so bad but I know trouble is stirring outside and right now I'm the only one with actual sense in this damn camp. Well me and Wells but he won't dare face Bellamy like I have. It's understandable though, everyone's afraid of him ever since he took charge. He can get pretty intimidating to other people but he didn't scare me.

I get up, stretch, and throw on my jacket and slip on my boots. I move my tent flap over and see Murphy and Wells circling each other with knifes. I groan and walk up to the chaos. Murphy tries to stab first but Wells grabs his arm and twists him around and holds the knife to his neck.

"Wells, let him go!" A voice comes from behind the trees and suddenly Clarke is in view. She looks to me, "You're suppose to be watching the camp."

"I am trying, trust me." Ever since Bellamy's speech last night people think they can do anything. They cheer for whatever the hell they want to do but they don't even know how many things can go wrong. If I wanted too, I could kill lots of people because apparently we can do whatever the hell we want. They just don't understand the consequences of no rules.

"Let him go, Wells." Clarke repeats and Wells shoves Murphy to the ground. The rest of the group comes into view and I see Octavia with a bloody leg and a makeshift bandage.

"What happened out there? Where's the food?" Bellamy turns to look at Clarke while I rush to Octavia's side to trying to inspect it. Bellamy notices her and rushes to her side too. My dad is a doctor back on the ark and I pretty much grew up in the medical area with him, he had taught me a lot through the years. Clarke was always in the medical area with her mom as well but there was two different wings and I never cared to make friends there, I just wanted to learn.

"Taylor, I already checked her leg. She needs a few stitches." Clarke explains to me and I nod still trying to take a look.

"We didn't make it to Mount Weather. We were attacked." Clarke says, me and Bellamy look at each other and stand up.

"Attacked? By what?" Bellamy asks.

"Not what. Who. It turns out, when the last man from the ground died on the Ark, he wasn't the last Grounder." Finn tells us and chills go down my spine.

"It's true. Everything we thought we knew about the ground is wrong. There are people here, survivors. The good news is, that means we can survive. Radiation won't kill us." Clarke looks around at everyone making sure they all understand. Well, now I know I won't die from radiation.

Finn adds in, "Yeah. The bad news is the grounders will." I can't believe this is happening. I thought are only real problem was Bellamy but it turns out we've got bigger problems.

"T." I hear Monty behind me and I turn around and give him a hug.

"Glad you're okay. Where's Jasper?" I smile pulling away and the group of five get quiet. I look around trying to see if he's trailing behind them but I don't see him.

"Taylor, Jasper was hit. They took him." Clarke tells me and my eyes widen and I shake my head.

"No. Stop messing around, where is he?" I turn to Monty and he shakes his head.

"Clarke, please tell me this is a joke. You said you would watch him for me." I walk up to her, she doesn't say anything.

"Well, then we have to go get him. Now." I say and Monty pulls me into a hug. Clarke looks away from me and to Wells. We need to find Jasper. I can't stand the thought of actually loosing one of my best friends, he's basically my brother. 

"Where's your wristband?" Clarke asks Wells. I'm now just noticing it's gone. He was the one who said not to take him off. What the hell happened?

"Ask him." He nods towards Bellamy and I realize that Bellamy probably took it off of him with force. What a dick.

"How many?!" Clarke yells.

"Twenty-four and counting." Murphy smirks and it sets Clarke off.

"You idiots. Life support on the Ark is failing. That's why they brought us down here. They need to know the ground is survivable again, and we need their help against whoever is out there. If you take off your wristbands, you're not just killing them. You're killing us!" She yells at them.

"We're stronger than you think." Bellamy tells her and looks around at everyone. Of course he has to speak, he just won't give up. He's being selfish.

"Don't listen to her. She's one of the privileged. If they come down, she'll have it good. How many of you can say the same? We can take care of ourselves. That wristband on your arm? It makes you a prisoner. We are not prisoners anymore! They say they'll forgive your crimes. I say you're not criminals! You're fighters, survivors! The Grounders should worry about us!" Bellamy finishes his speech and the crowd cheers. I don't know whether it's the anger or the sadness of Jasper being taken but I get out of Monty's grip and walk up to Bellamy.

"Hey, Bellamy." I say. He turns to face me and I punch him right in the face. The crowd goes quite right away and Bellamy moves his jaw around. I turn around and face everyone.

"If you guys don't get your shit together, we'll be dead in less than 5 days. If not by grounders than I will kill you all myself." I yell at them and they stay quiet.

"Idiots." I say under my breath but I know they all heard it. I turn towards Clarke,

"Let's go get Jasper back."  
  



	3. III.

"_Extraordinary people survive under the most terrible circumstances and they become more extraordinary because of it."_  
  
  
  


**3.**   
  
  
  


"You're not coming." Clarke tells Wells as me and her gathered supplies for our trip to find Jasper.

"My ankles fine, Clarke." He said to her and she shook her head.

"It's not your ankle, it's you."

"I'm going to help." He tells her and I groan, we're wasting time.

"Look we need all the help we can get, who cares who it is. We just need to find Jasper." I say and Clarke takes a second before finally nodding.

"Okay but, Monty, I'm sorry but you're not going." Goddamn it Clarke. Does anyone listen to what I say around here?

"Like hell I'm not. Jasper's my best friend."

"You're too important. You were raised on Farm Station and recruited by engineering." She explained to him.

"So?"

"So food and communication. What's up here,"   
She points to his head, "It's gonna save us all. You figure out how to talk to the Ark and I'll bring Jasper back." She had a good point this time. But I just wanted to leave and find Jasper already.

"I'll bring him back, Monty." I nod and he does as well.  
Clarke tells me to walk with her over to where Bellamy was talking with Octavia.

"You could have been killed." Bellamy tells her with worry in his eyes.

"She would have been if Jasper didn't jump in to pull her out." Clarke tells him and Bellamy looks up at her.

"You guys leaving? I'm coming too." Octavia tries to stand up but Bellamy pushes her gently back down.

"No, no. No way. Not again." He tells her and she rolls her eyes.

"He's right. Your legs just gonna slow us down. I'm here for you." She turns to Bellamy. I'm confused as to why we're here for Bellamy but I just wait. I see that he has a little bruise underneath his eye from when I punched him. Serves him right.

"I hear you have a gun." Clarke says to him and he lifts up his shirt. I've seen him shirtless before but I still take a glance at his stomach. I look at what we really came here for, the gun tucked into his jeans.

"Good. Follow me."

"And why would I do that?" He questions her.

"Because you want them to follow you, and right now, they're thinking only one of us is scared." Clarke replied. Well done, Clarke.

"Murphy, come with me. Atom, my sister does not leave this camp. Is that clear?" Bellamy tells them and Atom nods his head.

"I don't need a babysitter." Octavia rolls her eyes angry.

"Anybody touches her, they answer to me." He tells atom.

"Let's go." Clarke tells us, finally something I want to hear. As we walk away I turn to Octavia.

"Give 'em hell." I tell her and she smirks and nods.  
  
  
  
  


It's been a good fifteen minutes and so far it's been completely silent. No one seemed to be in the talking mood apparently.

"You call this a rescue party? Got to split up, cover more ground. Clarke, come with me." Finn comes out of nowhere surprising us all. He didn't want to come in the first place because he was scared but I see he has come to his senses.

"Wells is with me." I say and Wells nods. I couldn't stand being around Murphy and Bellamy. We all split up and I thank god, it was getting a little awkward.

"So how long have you been in love with Clarke?" I ask Wells and he stops walking and faces me.

"What are you talking about?" He asks and I laugh lightly.

"Oh come on Wells. It's so obvious. I'm not going to go telling anybody." He looks at me and continues walking so I walk beside him.

"Since we were 14." He tells me and I'm surprised he actually told me.

"Why does she dislike you so much though?"

"It doesn't matter-" he gets cut off by splashes and yelling. We both look at each other and follow the noise. We get to a little opening and see that Finn and Clarke are in the water. Clarke looks to actually be letting loose.

"We don't have time for this. We have to find Jasper." I tell them, they are playing around when Jasper could be in pain somewhere.

"Come on, princess, have a little fun." Bellamy says from behind me and I roll my eyes.

"Call me that one more time and I will punch you again." I huff and he laughs.

"Sorry, princess." He says. I go to punch him but he grabs me and leads me towards the water. All of a sudden he jumps and we both are submerged. I come up from under the surface and whack him in the head.

"Asshole." I groan and he smirks and he pulls me close to lift me up and throw me again. I come up for air and I place my hands on his head and dunk him underwater. He comes back up and laughs at me and I can't help but stare into his beautiful brown eyes. His hair is all messy from the water and his freckles are showing now more than ever. Sure he's an asshole but he's a good looking asshole.

"Hey we found something!" I hear Finn yell. I snap out of my trance and just now realize that Finn and Clarke had gotten out of the water already. Me and Bellamy walk to out of the stream. We see that they had found blood on a rock so Finn starts to lead us.

"Hey, how do you know we're going the right way?" Murphy asked.

"We don't. Space walker thinks he's a tracker." Bellamy jokes and I roll my eyes. 

"It's called four year earth skills, he's good."  
Wells said.  
After a couple minutes we heard groaning.

"What the hell was that?" Finn questioned. We heard it again and I realized that it's probably Jasper.

"Jasper!" I run ahead of the group while they try and tell me to slow down but I know it's him. I run a little more and I see an opening where Jasper is tied up on a post.

"Oh my god! Jasper!" I run faster to get to him, when I'm almost there though the ground gives out underneath my feet and I'm falling for a second until I feel a hand grab mine. I had almost fallen into a trap with spikes in it and I look up and see Bellamy holding me up. He just looks at me, almost as if he's debating whether to pull me up or let go. Before he can decide, if that's what he was really doing, I hear Finn and Clarke yelling at him to pull me up. He yanks me up and we both tumble back on the ground.

"Thank you." I tell him and he nods and looks away.

"We need to cut him down." Wells says.

"Murphy, help him." Finn tells Murphy. Murphy and Wells climb up and start cutting the ropes.

"There's a poultice on his wound." Clarke explains as we all look up at him.

"Medicine? Why would they save his life just to string him up as live bait?" Finn thinks out loud.

"Maybe what they are trying to catch likes its dinner breathing." Bellamy puts in.

"Maybe what they're trying to catch is us." Clarke suggests.

"Way to be hopeful." I mutter.

"Just trying to be realistic, Queen." Finn tells me.

"Yeah well-" I get cut off by a growling in the distance.

"What the hell was that?" Wells stops cutting to ask.

"God dammit, keep cutting!" I yell to him while us four on the ground look around us.  
Out of nowhere a panther comes out of the bushes and is headed straight towards me and Bellamy. Bellamy pushes me behind him and goes to get out his gun.

"Bellamy, gun!" Clarke yells but Bellamy doesn't have it. He turns around and throws his arm around me, crouching down and blocks me from the panther. All of a sudden there's a gunshot and we see Wells holding up the gun.

"It's getting up!" Clarke shouts and Wells raises the gun again and shoots it in the head. Bellamy slowly let's go of me and clears his throat.

"Get the parachute, we need to take this back to camp." I tell them. I'm still completely shocked that Bellamy was trying to protect me but I let it go figuring that anyone would help someone in that situation. He's been nothing but a jerk to me and everyone else. Now all of a sudden he's trying to save me?

After a long walk and rotating carrying Jasper and the panther we finally make it back to camp. Clarke immediately has Jasper taken to the drop ship while Murphy and Bellamy drop the panther.

"Who's hungry?" Bellamy yells and everyone cheers. I follow Clarke into the dropship while we check on Jasper. We check his body and temperature along with his heartbeat.

"He's stable for now but without medicine.." Clarke starts and I know she's right. We walk out the dropship and see that people are taking their wristbands off for food. And of course Bellamy was in charge. He has such different personalities. One minute he's saving me, twice, and the next he's a totally different person. I roll my eyes and walk to my tent to get the cup of berries and nuts I had but I get stopped halfway there. It's pretty dark from where we are cause my tent is set up away from everyone but I can still tell that it's Bellamy and he's holding something in his hand.

"Here, I know you're hungry." He holds the stick with meat out to me but I shake my head.

"I'm not taking off my wristband." I tell him.

"That's fine. Just take it." This is the Bellamy that I can deal with. He was being kind to me for the first time. I wait a second before grabbing the meat.

"Thanks."   
he nods his head.

"Oh and thanks for the incident with the panther." I tell him and he scratches the back of his neck.

"I didn't do anything."

"Yeah you did. So thanks." I smile at him and he actually gives me a small smile back. His smile is cute and it's such a difference from his regular demeanor. His smile is warm and inviting. But I can't have these thoughts about him, half the time he's a jackass and just because he acts nice once and flashes me a smile does not mean he's a good person. What am I thinking?

"You're welcome. I'll see you tomorrow." He nods his head to me and walks back to everyone while I walk on to my tent ready for a nice sleep. I would've stayed with Jasper but there's nothing I can do right now plus Monty is there with him, I'll be with him more tomorrow.  
  
  


"Hey, Taylor. Wake up. Clarke needs you." I hear someone say and feel a shove to my shoulder. I groan and swat them away.

"It's Jasper." He says and I'm automatically up. I see Miller crouching over me.

"What happened?" I get up and start to put on my boots and jacket.   
"He's been in pain." We both walk out of my tent and it's still dark out.

"How long was I out for?" I asked him as we walked to the drop ship.

"Around an hour, after everyone got some food they all went to sleep until Jasper started up with the noise." He explains to me as we walk in the drop ship.

"What noise?" As on queue I hear groans coming from the second floor of the dropship. I climb the ladder and open the hatchet. Monty, Clarke, and Octavia are here, Clarke is tending to his wound while Octavia and Monty watch.

"Good you're here. I need your help. His pulse is three eighty." She tells me, my eyes widen, oh Jasper. I go over to his side putting my hand on his head feeling the heat.

"I'll go get him some water." I say, he keeps groaning in pain and I hear someone from down below yell,

"Can he just die already?"   
I climb down the dropship and look around.

"Who said it?" I demand. Everyone looks clueless and some of them shrug.

"If I hear another complaint, you have me to deal with." I tell them and walk out the dropship and towards the tent with the water. As I'm walking I hear screams behind the tent and I run around to see a girl on the floor screaming and crying.

"No! No! No!" She yells. I get down and try to wake her up by shaking her shoulder gently.

"Hey, wake up. It's okay. It's okay. It's just a dream." She opens her eyes and looks around and looks at me.

"You're Charlotte, right? I'm Taylor. It's okay to be scared. Do you want to talk about it?" I rub her shoulder letting her know it's okay. I can't believe the ark sent her down, she's just a little girl. But actually I can believe it, the Ark doesn't care about us or what happens to us. That's why they sent us down here in the first place. If we die they can't come down, if we don't then they can. We're their damn guinea pigs.

"It's... my parents. They were floated and they... and I see it in my dreams and I just..." she tries to continue but she breaks down into tears again.

"Hey, I understand. My mom was floated. So, how did you end up here?"

"Well... we were taking my parents things to the redistribution center and... I kind of lost it. They said I assaulted a guard." She wipes away her tears and clears her throat.

"Been there before. I killed two of them..." I don't know I was talking about it but the little girl had no one. If I tell her some things maybe she will be comfortable with me.

"Yeah I know." Of course she did. Everyone knew what I did.

"Look, my point is, what happened up there is history. We can move past it, maybe being on the ground is our second chance." I say trying to convince myself as well. Up there I'm known as Taylor Queen the criminal, the girl who killed two guards. Down here people still know who I am and what I did, but maybe I can make something better of myself. There is hope down here.

"Do you really believe that?" She looks up at me snapping me out of my thoughts.

"I have to."  
  



	4. IV.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Never be afraid to let me know if I need to add or remove tags/warnings. I'm still new at this. :)

_The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."_   
  
  
  
  


**4.**   
  
  
  


After leading Charlotte to my tent I tell her to get some rest and that she can bunk with me from now on if she wants. I then realized I need to get the water for Jasper, I go back over to the tent and walk in. I see Bellamy drinking some water from his cup.

"Hey." He says and pours himself more water.

"Hi, Bellamy." I grab a cup and fill it up with water. As I'm about to leave Bellamy stops me grabbing my wrist.

"A bunch of us are going hunting tomorrow." He says invitingly and I nod.

"I'm always down for a party." He smiles at my comment and I smile back and walk out. I walk back to the drop ship with the cup full of water and I climb to the second floor.

"The Grounders cauterized the wound. Saved his life." Clarke cleaned the area around the wound wiping away dirt and other things.

"Saved his life so they could string him up for live bait. Garden of Eden this ain't." Finn said making me laugh a little.

"This is infected. He could be septic. Any progress on using the wristbands to contact the Ark? Monty?" Clarke questioned Monty snapping him out of his head.

"That would be a firm no."

"My mother would know what to do." Clarke sighed. I could tell she was discouraged but I had an idea.

"How's he doing?" Wells comes up from the first floor of the dropship.

"How does it look like he's doing, Wells?" Clarke snaps at him.

"Hey, I'm just trying to help." Wells raises his hands in defense.

"I have an idea." I say and everyone looks at me.

"Wells, hold him down." I explain while I grab my knife from my boot and start to burn it in the fire right next to us till it's glowing orange. Wells and Finn are now holding him down while I take the knife away from the fire.

"I'm not going to like this, am I?" Monty stutters in the corner and I shake my head no.  
I start to cut away all the infected parts of his skin and he starts to shout in pain.

"Hold him still! I need to cut away the infected flesh." They hold him down with more force so I can steadily do it.

"Stop it! You're killing him!" Octavia comes up and yells at me.

"She's trying to save his life!" Finn tells back at her while Bellamy comes up as well.

"She can't." He looks at me and shake my head. I don't understand him honestly.

"Back off." Wells stands up.

"Kid's a goner. If you can't see that, you're deluded. He's making people crazy." He tells us. I stand up and walk over to him after I finish cutting away the infected skin.

"If that was your sister in his place you would be begging us to do everything we could so I suggest you shut your mouth and leave him be." I clench my jaw and he stares at me. How can he be like this?

"Take a look at him, he's a lost cause." He totally disregarded what I had to say like always. Why do I even try anymore? Maybe I feel like he can change or maybe that I can change him.

"Octavia, I've spent my whole life watching my mother heal people. There's hope." Clarke says to Octavia and I nod.

"This isn't about hope, it's about guts. You don't have the guts to make the hard choices. I do. He's been like this for three days. If he's not better by tomorrow, I'll kill him myself." He yells and then climbs back down the ladder. I don't understand why he does this. He saved my life twice and now he wants to take a life? All for what? Because he doesn't think he will make it?   
  
  
  
  


"You ready?" Miller walks over to me and asks.

"Yeah I got my stuff let's go." We walk towards Bellamy and the rest of the hunting party and we start to leave camp through the 'front' entrance of the camp. We've already started to build walls and in three days we've gotten so much done.

"I hope we catch something, I'm dying for meat." Miller talks as we walk deeper into the forest looking out for animals.

"You and me both."   
We walk in silence for a mile longer until Bellamy sees something and tells us to get down. He points to something in the distance and I see that it's a boar. Bellamy gets up, ready to throw the axe at it but a twig snapping behind us causes it to run away scared. Immediately Bellamy threw the axe at the noise wedging itself in a tree right next to a little girl. Charlotte to be exact.

"Get him!" I hear one of the guys say while Miller and everyone except Atom takes off running after it.

"Who the hell are you?" Bellamy asks her and she walks toward us.

"Charlotte, what are you doing here?" I pull her close to me making sure she's okay.

"Well, what with that guy who was dying, I just... I couldn't listen anymore." She looks up at me with her big eyes like she's begging me not to send her back. I refrain from correcting her about Jasper.

"There's grounders out here. It's too dangerous for a little girl." Atom speaks up. Charlotte doesn't approve.

"I'm not a little girl." She crosses her arms and I smile.

"Okay then.." Bellamy pulls out a knife and hands it to her.

"But you can't hunt without a weapon. Ever killed something before?" He asks her and she shakes her head.

"Who knows, maybe you'll be good at it." He smiles at her and my heart warms at the site. I want this Bellamy, not just for a few sweet moments I want this Bellamy as our leader. Not the asshole who makes rude comments and wants to kill Jasper because he's tired of hearing him in pain. All of a sudden we hear a horn going off and we look around. I see yellow smoke coming right at us and something tells me it's not a good thing.

"Run!" I yell. I grab Charlotte's hand and we all run away from it not daring to look behind us.

"Come on! There are caves this way!" Bellamy shouts and I pull Charlotte along with me toward Bellamy and I continue running. Charlotte is now ahead of me and by Bellamy, we're almost to the caves when I trip on a tree root. I smack hard against the floor and pain shoots up my leg. I try to get up and run but my ankle only allows me to hobble slowly. Bellamy and Charlotte are already at the caves and Atom is nowhere in site.

I'm trying to go as fast as I can but it hurts to much, I see the fog coming closer to me and I try to keep going. All of a sudden I'm swept off my feet by Bellamy and were running towards the cave. We get there just in time but Bellamy gets burned from the fog on his hand just a little bit. He walks deeper in the cave and sets me down gently. I roll up my jeans to see my ankle is already bruised. I see Charlotte curled up in the corner and I hear Bellamy telling her to get some rest. Who knows how long we will have to wait in here for. Bellamy walks over to me.

"Are you okay?" He asks and I throw my arms around his shoulders and hug him. He just stands there at first but then he wraps his arms around me tightly and hugs back. My head is buried in his shoulder and I'm intoxicated with his smell, he smells of lemongrass and something uniquely him. I make it a quick hug and let go.

"You're always saving me." I shake my head.

"Well If you were dead, who else is going to put me in my place?" He says making the mood light and playful. I laugh at him.

"I can't seem to figure you out, Blake." I shake my head smiling.

"It's better that way." He tells me.

"I don't think it is." I look down at my shoes and I see his hand in the corner of my eye. It's red and I think it's starting to blister.

"Your hand." I grab it and inspect it closer.

"It's nothing." He pulls it back from me. I take my backpack off and dig around till I find what I was looking for. I grabbed a little can and opened it up, it was seaweed from a beautiful stream that I had discovered the other day while collecting sticks for my shelter. I had noticed the seaweed right away when I found the pound. It helps with wounds and burns, it helps them heal faster and helps with the pain. I grab a big enough piece out to cover his wound and we sit down on the cave floor.

"What is that?" Bellamy questions me.

"Seaweed, it will help your hand." I grab his hand and wrap it gently around the burn, I can tell it helped Bellamy already by the way he sighed and closed his eyes for a brief second.

"Thank you."

"It's the least I could do after you saved my life for the third time." I shrug and he smiles. It's rare to see him smile.

"How's your ankle?" He rolls up my jeans to   
look at it.

"It's bruised but not badly, it will be good enough to start walking on in a day." I say and he nods.

"Guess I'll have to carry you back to camp." He jokes.

"That would be nice."

"Keep dreaming, princess." I laugh and so does he.

"You know you're actually pretty decent when you're not being a world class dick." I laugh and prop my leg up on my backpack to make it more comfortable.

"I'll take that as compliment." He says.

"Can I ask you something?" I wait for him to say something but all he does is nod.

"What did you do to get down here?" I don't expect him to answer but I needed to ask.

"Taylor-" he starts but I cut him off.

"Hey, you never call me by my name."

"I thought you didn't like being called princess." He smirks and I sigh.

"It's growing on me." I shrug and he laughs.

"I already told you it's bad."   
He scratches the back of his neck, something I noticed he did a lot when he was nervous. He was being his true self with me, the really Bellamy Blake, the sweetheart.

"Bellamy, you can tell me." I place my hand on his and he looks down at my hand and looks back up to me.

"I shot jaha." He whispered.  
I couldn't believe it, Bellamy Blake killed jaha. I don't know how to feel about it, I mean Jaha did float my mom but Bellamy being the one to actually kill him was shocking. I realized Bellamy is trusting me with this big secret and I need to stay calm.

"Does anyone else know?" I ask and he shakes his head.

"You don't have any questions?"

"No. I understand you did it for your sister. You wanted to protect her. Just like how I want to protect Jasper, he's like a brother to me." Bellamy nods.

"I'm sorry about everything I said about Jasper, I was wrong. I won't let anyone touch him." He said. This makes my heart warm and I was in the moment so I leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you." I whisper. We continue to stare at each other until Charlotte screams.

"No!" Bellamy rushes to her side.

"Charlotte, wake up." He nudged her shoulder and she wakes up.

"I'm so sorry." She whispers. It saddens me to see her so broken, she's just a little girl no matter if she says she's not.

"Does it happen often?" He questions and she just sighs which gives him all the answer he needs.

"What are you scared of? You know what? It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is what you do about it." He tells her.

"But I'm asleep."   
I watch the two talk and notice how good Bellamy is with her. All those years taking care of Octavia showed him a lot I guess. He's so gentle with her and his voice is so mellow.

"Fears are fears. Slay your demons when you're awake, they won't be there to get you when you sleep."

"Yeah but how?"

"You can't afford to be weak. Down here, weakness is death, fear is death. Let me see that knife I gave you." She grabs the knife from his pocket and hands it to him.

"Now, when you feel afraid, you hold tight to that knife and you say, screw you. I'm not afraid." He hands her back the knife and she hesitates until Bellamy nods.

"Screw you I'm not afraid." Bellamy gives her a look knowing she can do better and I can tell Charlotte understands because she repeats the words but with a much stronger voice and her voice doesn't quiver.

"Slay your demons, kid. Then you'll be able to sleep." He tells her and she goes to lay back down. Bellamy comes back towards me and sits by me again. I can't help but smile at him.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Princess.." He warns and I laugh.

"It's just you're so different when no one is around." I tell him and he raises his eyebrows.

"So are you, you just don't realize it." He says. I guess Bellamy is not the only one who puts up a front. Everyone looks at me like this badass who killed two guards for this amazing reason. Someone not to be messed with because of the things I've done but in reality I'm just as scared as everyone else down here. Everyone knows about my ex boyfriend Jack and how he trained me and they think I'm some indestructible person but I'm not. At the end of the day I just want to be told everything will be alright.

"You okay?" Bellamy breaks me out of my thoughts and I nod my head.

"Yeah, I'm just tired of everyone labeling me as a murderer. That's not who I am. I did what I had to do. " I sigh. I don't even know why I'm telling him this but I'm tired of keeping it in.

"I know that. Don't let people define you, princess. You're strong and brave and you're much more than your past." This time he takes my hand and squeezes and I squeeze back.

"Now get some rest, we'll probably be in here for another hour." He says and I nod. Deciding I can't get comfortable I decide to just rest my head on his shoulder. I feel him tense up but than relax. We're still holding hands and it's very comfortable and I feel safe.

"I hope the others found somewhere to ride it out." I sleepily say and close my eyes.

"Don't worry about that right now." He tells me and I start to drift to sleep.  
  


  
_"It wasn't enough, Grace, we need more or they will die." I hear my dad say from outside my door. They were acting so different lately and I didn't know why. My best chance was listening in to their conversations but I could never figure it out._

_"I will try to get some today but guards have been on high alert near the medicine quarter. It's getting harder to sneak in and they will notice soon." My mom tells my dad. I can hear the worry in her voice and I know she's scared. What are they stealing and who's going to die if they don't get it?_

_"I know I know, but you know I already used up all my visits to get medicine from there. I have to go through the council if I need more. They are not going to let me get more." He tells her._

_"I know. I'll go later today. They will be fine." She says to my dad and after that there was nothing. Later that day my mom was floated. She was caught stealing herbs from the medical wing and that was the end of it._

_I hated my father for awhile thinking it was his fault, he should've stopped her but than I realized that what they were doing was good. My dad told me the truth, that they were trying to save sick farm station patients. They had become sick from the air in the station being polluted because of a certain crop that was grown by the science station. The only way to help them was to give them a particular medicine that my dad couldn't get his hands on so my mom stole it numerous times. The legal limit for the herb was only 3 grams. Which wasn't enough to save them and the council and the chancellor rather abide by the rules then bend them a little just to save people._

_But when my mom died I decided I would take her place, this way if I get caught I would only get locked up as to if my dad were to do it he would get floated. At the time Jack was my boyfriend and we had been together for a few months, he had been training me to fight so maybe I could become part of the guard but that's never what I really wanted. But his training and workouts came in handy when it came time to steal. I did it around 6 times until he found out and snitched. I knew he couldn't be trusted with the information so I never told him. I got locked up that day he found out even though he had promised he wouldn't tell. Luckily it was the last of the herb and it was enough for the rest of the people who were sick to get better. So I'm glad I did it, I'm just not proud that I had to kill two guards while trying to do it. One of them I even knew because he was friends with Jack but I carry it with me now. _   
  
  


"I think she's waking up." I feel tugs on my hair but I keep my eyes closed.

"How do you know how to braid hair?" I hear Charlotte ask Bellamy. So Bellamy is messing with my hair, it almost puts me back to sleep but I stay awake wanting to hear them.  
"I have a little sister and I always braided her hair." He tells her and I try not to smile at how cute that is. I can just imagine Bellamy through out the years braiding Octavia's hair and taking care of her when their mom is not there.

"I know you're up, princess." I hear Bellamy say and I can't help but smile and open my eyes.

"Busted." I say and he laughs. I grab my hair and it's braided into a neat braid going down my back.

"Nice work." I tell him and I think I see him blush.

"Hey, I helped." Charlotte interrupts as we laugh.

"Thank you."

"I think we're good to leave now, let me just make sure." Bellamy gets up and walks through the tunnel we came through and a couple seconds later he comes back.

"We're clear." He says and Charlotte stands up. I have trouble getting up but with the help of Bellamy I stand on my one foot.

"Can you walk?" Bellamy asks. I try to set my foot down on the ground and put a little force but pain sears up through my leg and I lift it I'm immediately.

"Not a chance." I huff.

"Charlotte, grab the backpack and I'll help the princess." Bellamy says. He puts an arm around my back and helps me walk while Charlotte is behind us.

"Now you're just overusing the name." I say.

"Shouldn't of told me you liked it." He shrugged and I laugh and shake my head. We walk through the tunnel and out of it into the woods.

"Atom! Miller!" Bellamy yells.

"We're over here!" We hear Miller call and suddenly Murphy, Miller, and two other guys, I have yet to learn their names come out in the open.

"Atom isn't with you guys?" I ask them and they shake their head.

"Are you okay?" Miller comes over to my other side and helps me.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just twisted it." I turn around to make sure Charlotte is okay but she's not behind us and I don't see her.

"Where's Charlotte?" I look to Bellamy and he looks around confused. Suddenly we hear a scream.


	5. V.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know I used the tags for warnings but I realized that this chapter has death and blood so just be cautious. If you watch the 100 though, these scenes are not new to you.

_"The hour of departure has arrived, and we go our separate ways, I to die, and you to live. Which of these two is better only God knows." _   
  
  
  
  


**5.**   
  
  
  


I tell Bellamy to run while Miller helps me as fast as we can to get where she was.

When we got there I understand why she screamed. There on the ground lied Atom, he had blisters from head to toe and even his eyes were puffy. 

"Oh my god." I lower myself to the ground to check his pulse.

"Very slow heartbeat. He doesn't have much time." I say pushing hair out of his face. 

"Kill me..kill...me." I hear him struggle to breath out and I can now confirm that the fog got into his lungs and he can't breath. I look to Bellamy and he gets down by me.

"Don't be afraid." Charlotte says to us and hands Bellamy the knife she had, Bellamy looks at me and then takes it from her hands

"Everyone go back to camp." Bellamy tells everyone around us.

"Princess, you too." He says while Miller is waiting for me so he can help me.

"No. Miller go. It's fine." Miller nods at me and walks ahead.  
Bellamy continues to stare at atom with the knife in his hands. I know he's not a killer and I know he doesn't want to do this to his friend, so I help

"Okay, I'm going to help you. Alright?" I tell Atom and I run my fingers through his hair and start to hum a song my dad use to sing to me all the time. I grab the knife from Bellamy's hand and slowly pierce it through atoms neck while still humming. He shakes for a couple of seconds and then his body goes limp. I pull the knife out and I look to Bellamy and nod. I can see tears in his eyes but he doesn't let them fall.

I want to pull him into a hug but I know he wouldn't want it. Earlier when I hugged him it was a thank you hug, but this would be a sympathetic hug and I know he doesn't want anyone's sympathy, that's just the way he is. Before I can even say anything; not that I would know what to say, he yells,

"Miller! Jones! Come help me carry him back to camp."

Miller and Jones turns were still waiting around. They come up with a big part of the parachute and they put him on and pick him up. 

"Miller, help her. We can carry it." Bellamy and Jones carry Atom. Miller walks to my side and helps me walk back to camp. When we enter its like everyone knows and they all stay quiet. We come to the middle of the camp and Bellamy sets down Atom. 

"We got the medicine for Jasper." Clarke says to us and we nod. She looks down at the makeshift gurney. 'Atom' I mouth and she cringes and nods and turns around just as Octavia exits the dropship. 

"It's about time. They're gonna kill Jasper. Did you get the medicine?" She asks Clarke.

"Yeah..I..I got it. Come on let's go talk." She tries to pull Octavia away but she sees the parachute by us and walks over.

"Octavia, just stay there. Please, stay back." He tries to tell her but she comes forward and Bellamy stops her.

"Why?" She tries to get away from him.

"Stop." She pushes him to the side and Bellamy let's her pass. She lifts up the jacket that was hiding his face.

"Atom." She whispers. I look down. I knew they liked one another, they were always sneaking around and teasing each other. They were cute.

"There's nothing I could do." Bellamy tries to step toward her but she shakes her head. 

"Don't." She covers Atom back up with the jacket and gets up to leave.

"O...O...please." He tries to grab her but she yanks her arm away. I know Bellamy is really trying to do what's best for her and it wasn't his fault. I know Octavia understands that, she's just hurt right now. But I think Bellamy really does believe it's his fault.

"Don't." She storms away from everyone. I wish I could chase after her but my ankle isn't allowing me to do anything right now. Murphy goes up to Bellamy and Bellamy sniffles and faces him.

"Lose anyone here?" He questions Murphy clearing his throat.

"No." He shakes his head.

"Jasper?" He asks him and takes a glance toward me.

"Still breathing. Barely. I tried to take him out, but your psycho little sister..." Murphy doesn't get to finish his sentence because Bellamy pushes him.

"Bellamy.." He tries to say but Bellamy grabs him by the collar.

"My what? My what?" He gets in his face. Murphy clears his throat and speaks."Your little sister." Bellamy shoves him away.

"Yeah, that's right. My little sister. Got anything else you want to say about her?" He stares Murphy down and it takes him a second to answer. I feel bad for Bellamy, he didn't want any of this to happen and now his sister is mad at him for something he had no control over.

"Nothing. Sorry." Murphy finally says. I can't help but smirk a little, Murphy is terrified of Bellamy. It brings me pleasure to see him squirm under Bellamy's harsh glare.

"Get him out of here, Jones." Jones and Murphy carry out Atom and Bellamy walks away toward his tent. Not before whispering something to some girl. Wonder what that's about.

"Hey, lets get you in the drop ship and let Clarke wrap you up." Miller says and helps walk me in the dropship.

"You know I can do it myself." I explain to him as he helps me sit up on the table and extend my leg.

"Just let her help you." He demands. He calls Clarke over and she comes and takes off my boot and rolls up my jeans. Miller leaves us alone to go up to the second floor.

"Just a bruised ankle, I can wrap it up. You'll be able to walk tomorrow, but you already knew that." She tells me while getting out the bandages and carefully starts to wrap my ankle. 

"Is Jasper okay?" I ask her. I haven't checked on him in awhile and I feel like such a bad friend.

"He's fine, we got seaweed to help with the pain. He's going to make it." She tells me grabbing my hand. I smile at her gesture and thank her for wrapping up my bandage. She goes to climb up the ladder to the second floor and when she gets up Miller comes down.

"Can you help me get to my tent?" He helps me walk down the dropship, as were walking to my tent I see a girl come out of bellamys tent with messy hair and then comes Bellamy right after throwing his shirt on. A sudden rush of jealousy runs through me. I don't know why but it upsets me and I wish it didn't. Our eyes meet and it looks like he's about to say something but I just look away rolling my eyes. Thought we had a moment back in the cave but I see that it was nothing.

"Here you go. Shout if you need anything. Okay?" Miller sets me down on the floor of my tent and I nod. 

"Thanks, Miller. I think I'm going to take a nap. Let me know if anything changes with Jasper." 

"Will do. Get some rest." He crouches out of my tent. I pull the small blanket over me and elevate my leg with my backpack and try to get some sleep.  
  
  


"Taylor, wake up. Jasper's awake." I hear a voice wake me up from my sleep. I thought it was going to be Miller but I open my eyes to see Octavia.

"Really?" I lift myself up right away and she helps me.

"He's still in a bit of pain but he's up. He's okay." She smiles at me and I side hug her while she helps me walk toward the dropship. 

"When did he wake up?" I ask her as I climb up the ladder with one foot.

"Probably around 30 minutes after Miller put you to sleep." She tells me and I nod. I get up and see Monty talking to Jasper. I don't see octavia coming up so I close the opening and wobble over to them and sit down on Jasper's other side.

"Hey, stud." I give him a kiss on the cheek and he smiles.

"Hey T, What's new?" He asks me and I laugh.

"Nothing much, I almost died on two occasions trying to save your ass. And then once more trying to hunt for food." I laugh and Monty and Jasper do as well.

"Guess who saved her life?" Monty smirks and Jasper looks at me. I look down and blush.

"Bellamy..." I whisper like its such a secret.

"Really, T? Do you like him or something?" Jasper questions me and then starts coughing. Monty grabs a cup from his side and makes him drink water. I'm glad he's up but I want him better.

"I don't know, he's actually very sweet once you get to know him." I tell them then I realize what I'm saying. I'm calling Bellamy sweet, the same Bellamy who wanted to kill Jasper and wants everyone to take off their wristbands. But it's also the same Bellamy who has saved my life on 3 occasions, the same Bellamy who held my hand in the cave, and the same Bellamy who couldn't kill his friend even to put him out of his misery. 

"Oh god, do you actually like him?" Monty gives me a disapproving look.  
I hesitate before answering because I truly don't know myself, do I like him? I don't know if it's possible. 

"If we're being honest I don't know, when I'm around him I get nervous but only sometimes because a lot of the time I want to punch him in the face." I explain. They laugh. 

"What are you going to do about this?" Monty asks me.  
I have to think before answering because I don't know, it seems like right now I'm just in the middle of everything. There's so much more important things to be worrying about but I'm sitting here trying to decipher my feelings.

"I guess I wouldn't do anything, he's slept with almost all the girls here and it's only been a week since we've landed."

"Maybe you can be the one to change that." Jasper says.  
  
  


After saying goodnight to Monty and Jasper I walk out of the dropship. My ankle is feeling better, although it still hurts to walk on it, but I ignore the pain. It seems lots of people decided to rest early because there were only a few people standing around the fire. I walk towards my tent and lift up the flap getting under it and sitting down. I take off my shoes and my jacket. I cover up with my blanket.

It's been a long day and I'm drained, but my peace and quiet is short lived when I hear commotion going on outside. I huff and slip back on my shoes and jacket and get out of my tent to see what's going on. Everyone's surrounding something and I walk up to the crowd. There's a guy right next to me so I ask him, "What's going on?"

He looks at me and swallows, "It's Wells, a grounder killed him."

A gasp leaves my lips. I push through the crowd and see Bellamy, Clarke, and Finn. I look down to see there's a body on the ground. There is a jacket over the face but the arms and legs are sticking out. I know it's Wells by the clothes on the body. Bellamy notices my presence and gives me a sad smile. I return it. I look over to Clarke who has tears in her eyes. Finn is rubbing her shoulder but she's not taking it and she walks away with Finn chasing after her.

"Miller, Jones, take him outside the wall, start digging." Bellamy orders them and they go and help pick up Wells. I know they are going to bury him.

Bellamy takes a look everyone who's still standing around, "Everyone clear out, it's over." Everyone follows Bellamys orders and they all start to go their separate ways. I walk up to Bellamy once everybody is gone.

"Are you okay?" He looks down at me, his expression is soft and it makes this situation hurt a little less.

"Yeah. I didn't know him too well but it's still terrible. Why would the grounders just kill him? It's random, we didn't do anything to make them attack us." I shake my head trying to figure out why this happened.

"I don't know, but we have to stay on high alert."


	6. VI.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh, hello, Murphy...

_"Darkness approaches from outside. I feel no light inside me strong enough to resist it."_   
  
  
  
  
  


**6.**   
  
  
  
  
  


"Hey, Taylor, could you stitch up Miller? He cut himself." Clarke comes up to me and asks. I have been been helping build the wall to keep grounders and whatever the hell else is out there out. After last night we're going to need more protection, especially since all we have are knifes and spears. Oh and Bellamys gun.

"Yeah sure, let me finish tying this real quick and I'll go help him." I tell her. She starts to walk away but I stop her when I notice her wrist. There's no wristband. 

"Clarke, where the hell is your wristband?" 

"I took it off." She shrugs like it was no big deal. She's the one who said to keep them on in the first place. Did she change her mind? We need as many people as we can to keep their wristbands on. Did Wells death have anything to do with it?

"What? Why?" How in the world could she be this stupid, Maybe Bellamy told her to take it off. I shake my head knowing that Clarke wouldn't willingly take her wristband off because of Bellamy. She had to of done it because she wants too or has a logical reason.

"To make her feel it." She said and walked away. What was that about? Make who feel it? She's hurting right now because of Wells and I think it's causing her to do irrational things like take off her wristband. My thoughts get interrupted when I hear Murphy yelling. 

"This section should be finished by tomorrow." He goes up to a guy out of breath and obviously tired, "Hey! You think the Grounders are just gonna sit around and wait for us to finish the wall? Maybe we should let the little girl do the lifting for you, huh?" He yells and points at Charlotte who's tying the wood together. Keep her out of this, Murphy.

"I just need some water then I will be fine." The guy tells him and Murphy rolls his eyes. I'm just about to get up to give him a piece of my mind when Bellamy butts in. 

"Murphy, get this guy some water." Bellamy demands Murphy. He then turns around to face Charlotte.

"Hey, you got this?" He asks her pointing to the big log on the ground. He really thinks Charlotte will be able to pick that log up? She goes to try and pick it up but Bellamy stops her.

"I'm just kidding." He gives her a light smile and she smiles back. I smile at the scene in front of me. Bellamy is really good with kids, it's cute.

"Uhh! What the hell is wrong with you Murphy!" A guy shouts. I turn to see Murphy peeing on the guy who asked for water and that sets me off. 

"Look at you! You wanted a water break, now get back to work." He tells him and I walk over to him.

"What does the princess want this time?" Murphy rolls his eyes at me. I swear I want to strangle him.

"Don't call me that." I grit my teeth.

"Why? You seem to be perfectly fine with it when Bellamy is calling you it. What, you got a crush on the leader, princess?" He laughs. My face turns red and I feel like everyone is staring. I know Bellamy is still here watching with Charlotte and I know I have to say something. 

"No, but it seems that you do since you're always kissing his ass." I smirk knowing I won this time. Some people listening started to laugh and Murphy looks angry.

"Now _you_ can get back to work." I smile at him and walk over to Connor who has a towel in his hand and is cleaning himself off.

"You good?" I ask him.

"Yeah, thanks. You're the only one around here who doesn't take his shit." He says wiping his collar of his jacket.

"Well, he's not in charge." I tell him.

"Who is?" He questions. I take a moment to realize that is something the camp hasn't figured out. I know everyone looks at Bellamy as someone to follow orders from but then there is Clarke. But we all haven't discussed it.   
I voice my thoughts, "That's a good question." 

"Well if it's based on vote I would sure as hell pick you." He says and walks over to a group of people helping with the wall. Me? Why would I be the leader? 

"Hey, Taylor. Miller is waiting for you in the dropship. He said you were suppose to stitch him up like 10 minutes ago. He almost started to do it himself." Monroe says coming up to me. Oh shit, I forgot all about that.

"Thank you!" I start running towards the drop ship and go in. I see Miller sitting on the table with a wet rag over his hand.

"Finally, I could have died." Miller suggests and I roll my eyes.

"Okay, drama queen." I see everything was already there in front of me so I grabbed some alcohol that Clarke had leftover from her little trip out into the woods and I poured it on his cut. His face scrunched up in pain but he made no sound. He explained that he cut it while trying to make a knife from the metal of the dropship. It obviously didn't go so well.

"This is going to hurt." I tell him and he nods. I pierce the needle through his skin in and out and start to close up the little gash. Blood continues to drop out a little but not too much where I should be concerned. After a couple of minutes I finish and I cut the wire. I grab some bandage and wrap it around his hand so it won't get infected.

"There, you're good as new." I smile up at him.

"Thanks. Taylor." 

"You're welcome, oh and here." I pull my knife out of my boot and hand it to him.

"Why are you giving me your knife?" He gives me a strange look.

"Because I have another and you need one." 

"Thank you. I should go help with the wall." He sticks the knife into his pocket jacket.

"Be careful, don't go too hard on the hand, the stitches could easily reopen." I tell him and he nods and walks out. I hear the opening to the second floor open and down comes Octavia and..Jasper? She helps him climb down the stairs making sure he doesn't fall and then she lets him lean on her a little for support.

"What are you guys doing?" I ask curiously.

"He's going outside the wall for the first time since the accident, it's a big day." She smiles and he grimaces. 

"Yay!" He says sarcastically and me and Octavia both roll our eyes.

"Want to join us?" Octavia offers but I politely decline. I need to check on Charlotte and talk to Bellamy. I follow them out and they go towards the entrance of the fence while I go see Charlotte who is currently at the water station.

"Hey, you doing alright?" I cross my arms waiting for her answer. She finishes drinking and wipes her mouth with the back of her hand. 

"Yeah, I think I'm going to go rest." She says and I can tell by her voice something is off but I don't push it because she's willing to get some sleep when before she didn't like to because of her nightmares. I nod my head at her and tell her to rest up and she walks away. Now I have to go talk to Bellamy. I look around for him and then I spot him talking to a couple of guys, he's pointing at different things and talking and the guys all nod their heads every couple of seconds. He sure looks like the leader to me. I walk over to him just as soon as he finishes talking to the guys and they walk away. He smirks when he sees me.

"Hello, princess."

"It's Queen to you." I tease.

"I need to talk to you." I add and his expression changes. He seems to get a little serious and he nods.

"Alright, let's talk in private." He makes me follow him into his tent. We get a couple of looks from people hanging around and I already know what they are thinking.

"What did you want to talk about?" He asks as soon as we enter his tent.

"Murphy." 

"Murphy? What about him?" He questions and I give him a pointed look.

"What about him? He's a jackass, he thinks he can demand people around like he runs this place. You need to talk to him." I wait for what he's going to say.

"Why? He's just making sure we get the wall up quickly." He shrugs and I groan.

"Pissing on people is not okay, Bellamy." I give him a dirty look.

"Whatever gets the wall up." I can't believe he just said that. I hate this Bellamy, he acts like he doesn't care about anyone or anything.

"You act like you don't care but I know you do." I say and his expression changes. 

"I don't. We need that wall built. " He fires back stepping closer to me.

"You know what, Bellamy. Fine. If you won't put Murphy in his place, I will." I roll my eyes. He doesn't say anything for a couple of seconds, and we just glare at each other. I can't deny the attraction I feel in the moment but he's being a jerk.

Octavia bursts in without warning and me and Bellamy disconnect our stare down and look over to her. She gives us a weird look but quickly gets out what she came in here to say, "Guys, we have a big problem."  
Me and Bellamy share a look and follow her to the tent that holds all our food and water. Clarke, Finn, and Jasper are all in here.

"So what's the problem?" Clarke asks and Jasper and O share a look. Octavia brings out a rag and unwraps what's inside. There's a finger inside and I almost gag.

"What the hell is this?" Finn questions her.

"It's Wells fingers, we found it just outside the wall." Octavia explains.

"Okay, what's the problem?" I ask. I wasn't trying to be rude by why is she showing us his fingers? Clarke doesn't need to be reminded of his death.

"We found this right by him." Jasper places a knife on the table and Clarke grabs it and inspects it. 

"Who else knows about this?" Bellamy asks his sister.

"No one, we came straight here." She answers.

"Grounders didn't kill wells." Clarke says. She shakes her head, I know she's trying to hold it together but I know it's hard for her.

"What do you mean?" Octavia speaks.

"This knife is made from the metal of the dropship. It was one of us." She explains. Well this keeps getting stranger, who would kill Wells? I know he didn't make many friends because of who his father was but someone went as far as to kill him? 

"So there's a murderer in the camp?" Octavia questions.

"There's more than one murderer in this camp, this isn't news. We need to keep this quiet." Bellamy speaks up and I nod. He's right. This could get out of hand really bad and really fast. Clarke tries to step out of the tent but Bellamy blocks her.

"Get out of my way." She grits her teeth.

"Clarke, be smart about this. Look at what we've achieved... the wall, the patrols. Like it or not, thinking the Grounders killed Wells is good for us." He made a good point but we can't just let the murderer go around killing people. It's not safe. 

"Oh, good for you, you mean. What... keep people afraid and they'll work for you? Is that it?" She yells at him. 

"Yeah. That's it. But it's good for all of us. Fear of the Grounders is building that wall. And besides, what are you gonna do... just walk out there and ask the killer to step forward? You don't even know whose knife that is." He stated. 

"Oh, really? J.M. John Murphy. The people have a right to know." My blood turns cold at the initials on the knife. Murphy? My fist clench at my sides, how could he do something like this? I knew he hated him but I mean they hadn't fought in awhile. I don't get it.   
Clarke pushes past Bellamy and out the tent and we all follow. Murphy is demanding people around as per usual.

"You son of a bitch!" Clarke yells at him and people stop what they are doing to watch the scene before them unfold. 

"What's your problem?" He crosses his arms.

"Recognize this." Clarke holds up the knife for him to see. 

"It's my knife, where'd you find it?" He fires to grab it but Clarke pulls her hand back. 

"Where you dropped it after you killed Wells." Everyone started whispering and I knew this wasn't going to end well. 

"Where I what? The grounders killed Wells not me." He looked confused and I actually believed him. Something just seems off. 

"I know what you did and you're going to pay for it." Clarke spits at him.

"Really, Bellamy? You really believe this crap?" He looks to Bellamy and he stays quiet. 

"You threatened to kill him, we all heard you. You hated Wells." Clarke said. 

"Plenty of people hated Wells. His father was the chancellor who locked us up." Murphy tries to further his point. 

"Yeah, but you're the only one who got in a knife fight with him." This seemed to drag on all this bickering, if we kept this quiet everything would be fine. I actually agree with Bellamy on this one but it's too late now.

"Yeah, I didn't kill him then either." 

"Tried to kill Jasper too." Octavia butts in and Jasper eyes go wide. I would've laughed if this situation was different but it's not.

"Come on, this is ridiculous. I don't have to answer to you, I don't have to answer to anybody." He yells making Bellamy step forward.

"Come again?" 

"Bellamy, man, I'm telling you I didn't do this." He pleads. 

"They found his fingers on the ground with your knife." Bellamy adds. I decide I should cut in, I don't know if me saying anything will make a difference but it's worth a shot. 

"Doesn't mean it was him, it could've easily been someone else who stole Murphy's knife." I say and Bellamy and Clarke both look at me disappointed. I understand why, I don't like Murphy anymore then they do but something tells me Murphy didn't kill Wells. And if he did he would sickly gloat about it to everyone.

"The chances of that are slim." Clarke begins. "Is this the kind of society that we want? You say there should be no rules. Does that mean that we can kill each other without... without punishment?" 

"I already told you I didn't kill anyone!" He yells. I believe him, I really hate Murphy but I believe him. 

"I say we float him." Someone in the crowd says and my eyes widen. This is bad. 

"Yeah!" People shout.

"That's not what I'm saying." Clarke says but she knows and we all know she shouldn't of said anything. I think she did this more out of anger and sadness than anything. She just lost one of her best friends, she's not in the right place. 

"Why not? He deserves to be floated. It's justice." Another person shouts.

"Revenge isn't justice." Clarke shakes her head.

"It is justice! Float him!" Someone yells and everyone runs up to him beating him to the ground. I immediately run towards the crowd and pull people away but there's too many and they shove me back.

When did we become so violent?  
  
  



	7. VII.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings once again, attempted hanging and violence. I feel like the tags are self explanatory and if you watch the show you know what happens but just to be sure!

_"We are all the pieces of what we remember. We hold in ourselves the hopes and fears of those who love us. As long as there is love and memory, there is no true loss."_   
  
  
  
  


**7.**   
  
  
  
  


"No! Get off him! Stop!" Clarke yells but at this point it's useless. They pushed Murphy down the hill and started to tie a rope around his neck and around the tree. They bounded his hands behind his back and set him up on a crate. Oh god, they're going to hang him. I try running forward again but everyone shoves me back and I look to Bellamy.

"You can stop this! They'll listen to you!" I yell at him. He looks at me then to Murphy who's struggling to get out of the binds.

"I think Bellamy should do it!" A guy shouts and everyone starts chanting his name. He looks towards me and I shake my head.

"You're not a killer, Bellamy." I say with tears in my eyes and he looks back to Murphy. He starts to walk forward and I yell at him.

"Bellamy, no! You can't do this, Bellamy! Please stop!" He doesn't listen to me and places his foot on the crate and turns to Clarke.

"This is on you. You should've kept your mouth shut." He says and pushes the crate back and Murphy struggles in the air. It's a horrible sight to see and I almost want to throw up, I don't know whether it's from seeing him hanging there so helplessly or from the person who caused it to happen. 

"No! Cut him down! Stop!" Clarke yells but no one listens.

"Stop! Murphy didn't kill Wells! I did!" A voice came from behind me and I turn around to see Charlotte. Oh my god. I whip back around and grab bellamys axe and chop the rope off the tree. Murphy falls to the floor catching his breath.  
I go back over to Charlotte and quickly grab her hand and lead her towards the closest tent which was bellamys, soon after Bellamy, Clarke, and Finn follow us in.

"Bring out the girl, Bellamy." I hear Murphy yell. That was fast.

"Why, Charlotte?" Bellamy crouches down to her level.

"I was just trying to slay my demons like you told me." She said and Bellamy looks at me. I crouch down beside them and talk to her.

"She misunderstood him. Charlotte that's not what he meant." I shake my head. I can't believe she would do something like this. 

"Bring the girl out now!" Murphy yells. Shit. 

"Please don't let them hurt me." She grabs on to mine and Bellamy's hands.

"If anyone has any bright ideas, speak up." Bellamy says but everyone still seems to be in shock. Hell, even I am.

"Now you stay quiet." He shakes his head.

"Hey, those are your guys out there." Finn points to Bellamy. 

"This isn't my fault, if she would have listened to me those idiots would still be building the wall." Bellamy yells at Finn. 

"Stop fighting! Look Clarke and Finn sneak out the back of the tent with Charlotte while we distract Murphy." I tell them and they share a look before nodding and grabbing Charlotte and going out the back.

"Let's go." I tell Bellamy and he nods. We walk out the tent to see Murphy and a crowd behind him.

"Look who decided to join us, the king and his queen." Murphy laughs dryly. I roll my eyes, I was the only one actually defending him.

"Dial it down and back off." Bellamy demands.

"Or what? You're going to hang me?" He questions.

"Murphy, it was a misunderstanding. It's over now." I try to reason with him.

"A misunderstanding?! You guys were so ready to kill me for something I didn't do!" He shouts at us.

"Murphy, it's over!" Bellamy yells and Murphy nods.

"Whatever you say, boss." Murphy starts to turn away and so does Bellamy. Before I could warn Bellamy, Murphy turns around, grabs a log and hits Bellamy over the side of his head. I quickly rush over to him as does Octavia to make sure he's okay. He's passed out and Murphys yelling for Charlotte once he finds out she isn't in the tent. 

"Bellamy, wake up!" I shove him and Octavia got some water to throw on him. He doesn't wake and I know it will be awhile till he does. 

"Octavia, make sure no one leaves the camp. I need to go find Charlotte before Murphy does." I say and she nods her head. I get up and head in the direction I knew Clarke and Finn went in. I was walking for awhile and the sun had already started to go down, where the hell are they? Around 30 minutes pass and it's gone dark already making it harder to find her. All of a sudden I hear twigs snapping and the sound of rushed footsteps coming my way. The moonlight is bright enough to show me that it's Charlotte running. Before she passes me up I grab her and pull her to the side and cover her mouth once I hear Murphy in the distance. Charlotte tries to scream but I shush her letting her know it was me. I heard more rushed footsteps and for a moment I thought Murphy had found us but the figure came in to site and it was Bellamy. 

"Quick this way!" Bellamy whisper yells and we try to run but Charlotte tries to get out of our grip.

"Stop! Let me go!" She yells.

"Hey stop were trying to help you." Bellamy explains trying to keep his voice down not like it mattered since Charlotte wouldn't keep hers down. Why is she acting like this?

"Stop helping me! I'm not your guys' little sister!" She yells. "I'm over here." My eyes widen and I cover her mouth as she tries to scream. Damnit. 

"Come on!" Bellamy says and throws her over his shoulder and starts to run, I follow close behind trying my best to keep Charlotte's mouth closed with my hand. I can hear Murphy almost right behind us because Charlotte won't stop screaming. We keep running until we get to an opening, we can't run anymore because of the cliff. We're trapped. We turn around to see Murphy and his crew walk up. 

"Put me down!" Charlotte yells. Bellamy puts her down but holds on to her.

"Damn it, Bellamy! You can't fight all of us! Give her up." Murphy demands. 

"Maybe not but I guarantee I'll take a few of you with me." He adds.

"Same goes for me, Murphy, now stop this." I move forward to shield Bellamy and Charlotte in case Murphy tries anything. I then realized it was a bad idea when Murphy caught me off guard by yanking my arm and turning me around to press a knife against my neck. 

"Murphy, let her go!" Bellamy shouts.

"I will, just give me the girl." He demands the trade.

"No, don't do it. Charlotte, no." I say as Charlotte tries to get out of Bellamy's tight grip. 

"No, please. Please don't hurt her!" Charlotte screams.

"Don't hurt her? Okay, I won't. Just come with me." She keeps struggling but Bellamy won't let up.

"No, Charlotte." I say trying to get my neck as far away as I can from the sharp blade. I know it already pierced my skin because I can feel blood tricking down. I hear footsteps behind us and I see Clarke and Finn walk up.

"Oh, glad you guys could join us. We're just about to trade." Murphy laughs.

"Let her go, Murphy, you don't have to do this."Clarke says cautiously.

"No, I do. I mean why shouldn't I kill the bitch? She's punched me more times than I can count and she's always bitching at me." I tried to wiggle out of his grip but he pressed the knife deeper into my skin.

"Murphy, stop!" Bellamy yells at him.

"Give me the girl." He says.

"Charlotte, no." I tell her as she keeps struggling to get out of Bellamys grip. Bellamy pushed her behind him so she would stop.

"No, stop! No one else can get hurt because of me, not anymore." I didn't realize what she was doing until she started to step back. I screamed when she threw herself off the cliff. Murphy had let me go and I ran to the edge hoping that she maybe held onto to something but there was no sight of her. I couldn't hear anything, I felt ringing in my ears. Just like that she was gone. For a second reality hit me and I heard Clarke and Finn yelling at Bellamy. 

"Get off of me he deserves to die!" Bellamy yells and I see him getting pulled off of Murphy by Finn. 

"No, down here we don't get to decide who lives and dies." Clarke says.

"So help me god if you say the people have a right to decide..." Bellamy trails off.

"No, I was wrong before. You were right. Sometimes it's dangerous to tell the truth. But we can't do whatever the hell we want. There has to be rules." Clarke states.

"And who makes those rules?" He questions her. 

"We do, us 3." I knew she was talking about me, Bellamy, and her.

"So what then? We take him back and pretend like it never happened." Bellamy gets up. I stand up to and wipe the tears out of my eyes. I'm still in shock of what happened and I'm still trying to process it all but I know what we need to do.

"No." I say. "We banish him." They look at me and nod.

"Get up." Bellamy tells Murphy. He listens and Bellamy grabs him and drags him to the edge while Clarke yells at him to stop.

"I ever catch you near camp, we'll be back here. Understand?" He shoves Murphy away and looks to the guys who were following him, " As for the four of you, you can come back and follow me, or go off with him to die. Your choice." Their choice is made clear when they start to walk back towards camp. 

"Screw that, if you show up here again. You will have me to deal with. Dying is too easy." I spit at him with venom laced in my voice and walk past him and Bellamy. Everyone was already far ahead and I dragged my feet not wanting to walk anymore. Tears started running down my cheeks before I realized it and I had to stop and take a breath. I heard the crunch of leaves behind me. I wiped my tears away, cleared my throat, and continued walking.

"Are you okay?" Bellamy whispers softly and for a second I close my eyes at how soothing his voice sounded. I want more than anything to hug him and let his arms wrap around me.   
And I wish I could let myself give in, but it's not fair to me that he picks and chooses when he wants to be decent towards me.

"Fine." I say and leave it at that except he doesn't. He stops me from walking and he makes me face him.

"You're not fine, it's okay to cry, princess." He uses princess in so many different ways. One day it will sound snarky and the next it will sound so sweet rolling off his lips. This is why I don't get him. I don't get him but I like him. I like Bellamy Blake which is why I have to disconnect myself. I can't like him. He's so back and forth and it makes my mind spin and I'm tired of getting dizzy. He doesn't just get to be nice to me when ever he feels like it and then go back to saying rude things.  
I stop walking and look at him, "Stop, Bellamy." 

"Stop what?" 

"Stop acting like you care, we both know tomorrow you'll just be back to being an asshole when everyone is around. I don't need this, so just stop." I shake my head and walk away from him. It felt good to say that after it's been pent up for so long, I'm just tired of his back and forth games. Sometimes I think we're friends and sometimes I think we could never be because of the stupid stuff he does. He's still the same Bellamy as much as I want to think otherwise.

We finally arrive to the gates and I go to the water tent deciding I needed something to drink. I felt sick after everything. As I was drinking water my neck started to hurt and I realized that I forgot to clean my cut up. I grabbed a rag from the table and poured some water on it and started to wipe my neck, I couldn't see but I know I was getting it when I saw the crimson color in the rag. When I finish I step out and head over to the fire, a few people stand around it and I spotted Miller.

"Hey, Taylor, I'm sorry about Charlotte." He said pulling me into a hug. It stung to hear her name but I had to get over it. I couldn't sit here and cry no matter how much I wanted to.

"Thanks." I didn't know what else to say. We stood there for awhile talking, or at least he was and I was trying to listen. My head wasn't clear and I couldn't focus on what he was saying. 

"Look a shooting star." He said catching people's attention. I look up admiring it but I realized it wasn't a shooting star.

"That isn't a shooting star. They're coming to help us!" I smile genuinely. Something good has come out of this day. People cheer and talk about what they hope they are bringing. I look to my left and see Bellamy get out of his tent shirtless with a some random girl and my heartbreaks. His eyes meet mine and I look away, I knew it. 

"I hope they bring shampoo." The girl who came out of his tent said. I roll my eyes at her. Shampoo really? 

"You sure know how to pick 'em." I say to Bellamy who is now standing next to me and he looks angry.

"At least I'm getting some."

"Whatever, Bellamy. Go float yourself." I roll my eyes at him, can I ever catch a break with guys?   
  
  
  
  
  


_"Jack we need to talk." I say when he opens the door. I went to his place on the Alpha station. It's been bugging me for awhile now but I've realized me and Jack just don't go together. He's a dick half the time and I don't see him a lot anyways. Not to mention I just don't feel anything anymore with him like I use to._

_"Yeah, babe, come in." He steps aside and let's me walk in and I go sit on his couch. The couch that we've shared many memories on, some good and some bad. But it was just a couch and he was just a guy. And this is just not what I want, scratch that, what I need anymore._

_"What's wrong?" He asks taking a seat right next me. He faces me and looks me in the eyes. I've looked into those eyes millions of times before and for awhile they had felt like home but now when I look in them I just feel lost. _

_"There's no easy way to say this, _ _Jack_ _, it's just I haven't felt happy in a long time and I don't think I can continue this." I don't look down and I don't feel ashamed or guilty. I look straight into his eyes because I shouldn't feel any of those things if I'm doing what's going to make me happy. _

_"You're breaking up with me?" He stands up and puts his hands on his head. I nod._

_He laughs hysterically._

_"You are breaking up with me?" He questions and I nod slowly at his tone._

_"Jack-" I try to talk but he cuts me off._

_"I guess it doesn't matter, I got what I wanted." He shrugs. My mouth falls open and suddenly I'm confused._

_"What the hell is that suppose to mean?"_

_"It means I got a good lay. I got what I wanted." I shake my head, I wasn't sad, I was angry. I invested so much time into our relationship and all for what? For him to just want to screw me? He was my first and I'm angry at myself for letting him take that away from me. I didn't love him, I should've waited but he convinced me and I let it happen._

_"Looks like you did, Jack, have a nice life." I clench my jaw, turn around, and walk out his door. I haven't been back since. He tried to talk to me when he would see me but I always dodged him._

_He had found out a couple weeks later that I was stealing herbs for medicine for my dad to help the sick patients. And like the jackass he was, he told Jaha. That's when I got locked up. He still came around my cell every once in a while since he was a guard. I hated him, I think I still do._   
  
  
  
  


"Taylor, wake up." I felt an urgent shaking on my shoulders and I lift my head to see Clarke waking me up. 

"What is it?" I groan, sitting up and rubbing my eyes.

"Bellamy, is going after the pod that got sent down after he told everyone not to go looking for it. Whatever is in that pod, he wants it." She said. I got up and walked out of my tent with her. I knew what Bellamy was doing. He shot Jaha, he wants to destroy any communication to the Ark. There's no doubt in my mind.

"So, we're going after him right?" I ask her and she nods her head. We meet up with Finn and gather some water and food in her backpack. All I've been eating is nuts and berries since we got here, well besides the panther but it's been a little over 2 weeks since that happened. It feels like longer though. That was when Wells was alive and Murphy was still here. Clarke grabs a stick with pieces of cloth wrapped around it, it was wet so I was guessing that it was already drenched in rocket fuel. I was proved right when she put the end into the fire and it sprung up in flames. Now we have light.

"The pod landed somewhere over there in the mountains, you ready?" Clarke pointed to the left of us, and I nodded along with Finn. The guys on guard opened the entrance for us and we all left. It's amazing how fast we got up the wall, I feel so much more safe now and I can sleep a little better at night.   
I step over branches and rocks following Clarke's lead, "How long of a trip are we looking at?" I ask. 

"Maybe fifteen miles. We will be there by sunrise." Clarke explains.   
A silence falls over us as we make the long walk in the dark. It was that way for awhile until Finn speaks up. 

"So, Taylor, I heard you've got a thing for one of our leaders and I'm not talking about Clarke." Finn suggested. I swear if Jasper and Monty said something I will kill them.

"Yes it's true, I'm in love with myself." I say and they laugh.

"Not her either. You got the hots for Bellamy, don't you?" I can see his smirk from the glow of the torch and I roll my eyes. I didn't know Finn too well, we never even talked before this other than a couple of sentences. But he was funny and down to earth and his company wasn't too bad. Except for now when he's talking about something he knows nothing about. Even if he was right.

"No, I don't." 

"Don't worry, your secrets safe with us." He says. 

"Don't test me, Finn." I playfully respond and he laughs. 

"Sorry, Mrs. Blake." He throws his hands up in defense and I punch his shoulder.

"Jerk." I mutter and Clarke laughs.

"Taylor Blake does have a nice ring to it." Clarke says shrugging and my mouth drops.

"Clarke!" I groan. They are such children but it feels nice to play around with them. We don't get too many moments out here to just joke around. 

"Sorry, it's funny." She tells me and I shake my head. Why is everyone teasing me about him lately? After what he said I couldn't stand to see him. After what he did I can't stand to see him. He sleeps around constantly when something goes wrong and it's so unhealthy and not fair to me. I know me and him aren't a thing but he's always being extra nice to me and saying sweet stuff and I never know how he feels. But that's out of the question right now. I like him but there's nothing I can do about what he does.


	8. VIII.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, Raven...

_"We're here, and then we're gone, and it's not about the time we're here. But what we do with the time."_   
  
  
  
  


**8.**   
  
  
  
  


"Hey, is that it?" Finn says running ahead of me and Clarke. It's daylight now and my feet are killing me.

"We found it!" Finn shouts enough for us to hear but not too loud for anyone further to hear. Me and Clarke walk up to him while he scans the area to make sure there's no grounders lurking. We open the handle of the door and see a dark haired girl either passed out or dead. I recognize her once I get a clear view of her face, her name is Raven. Me and her shared a mechanics class. Although I only stayed in that class for a month I still learned some things and I knew her. From the blood I want to say she's dead but I put my fingers to her neck and there's a pulse. I also take notice that she's breathing slightly. 

"Raven. Raven, wake up." I shake her a little and she starts to move. Me and Clarke share a look and she opens her eyes.

"I made it?" She gets up a little slowly and me and Clarke move out of her way so she can get out. She steps out of the pod and looks around and takes it all in.

"I imagined it would smell like this." She smiles and I smile at her. I was her two weeks ago, taking it all in for the first time. Everything seemed so simple two weeks ago. We were just kids stepping foot on the ground and breathing it all in, and now. Now we have grounders to worry about and poisonous fog.

"There's no one around." Finn says walking up and his eyes widen at the girl.

"Raven?" He questions and Raven turns to him and smiles and runs and jumps on him.

"Finn." She says and kisses him. Oh god. I look over to Clarke and she looks hurt. I know they had something going, it was so obvious. The little touches they shared and sometimes at night I would see him go into her tent.

"Are you okay?" I ask her and she nods. Raven and Finn both walk up to us.

"She needs to put pressure on her wound." Clarke tells them and gets out a rag and hands it to her.

"Thanks." Raven says and takes it from her. Finn introduces me, and Raven even says she recognizes me from our class we had together. Then he introduced Clarke and Raven's eyes widen.

"Clarke? This was all because of your mom." She tells her and Clarke looks confused.

"My mom? This was all her plan?" She questions Raven.

"We were trying to come down here together. If we waited oh, my God..." She pushes past us and starts looking in the pod for something. The radio.

"The radio is gone. It must have gotten loose during reentry." She explains to us groaning.

Finn shakes his head, "Someone got here before us."

"We need to find him." I say. Bellamy has taken this thing too far.

"Three-hundred people are going to die to save air if we don't get in contact with the ark." She explains and my heart drops. I couldn't hate Bellamy more if I tried to right now. Three-hundred innocent people are going to die because he swiped the radio.

We go in the direction we came from and soon up ahead we see Bellamy. We get closer to him and he turned around surprised to see us all here.

"Where is it?" I step up to talk to him. He looks into my eyes and I almost want to look away but I don't.

"Hi, princess." He speaks. I don't change my expression.

"You taking a walk in the woods?" He asks me. He knows we know, he's just playing stupid. My fists clench and it takes everything I have in me not to punch him. I don't know how I have more self control over punching him than I did with Murphy. I guess it was because I didn't have a big ass crush on Murphy like I do Bellamy. But right now it seems impossible to even think about liking him.

"They are getting ready to kill three hundred people to save oxygen." I tell him and his demeanor changes for a second but then his face goes blank again.

"And I can guarantee you it won't be council members. It'll be working people. Your people." I point at his chest and he stays quiet while looking down on me.

"Where's the radio?" Finn tries since he obviously isn't listening to me.

"I don't know what you're talking about." He says still staring at me. Our gaze holds and I want to tell him that he doesn't have to do this, that he's better than this, but I can't because my anger is getting the better of me.

"Bellamy.." I warn.

"Bellamy Blake? They're looking everywhere for you." Raven walks up to us. Oh no. She's going to tell them. I guess it's what he deserves after being such a dick, but I know the reason he did it. I just hate what he's doing now because of it.

"Shut up." He says through his teeth.

"Looking for him, why?" Clarke asks the girl.

"He shot chancellor Jaha." She says making me cringe. Now it's out. I see Bellamy looking at me almost pleading for me to do something but there's nothing I can do, it's out now.

"That's why you took the wristbands off." Clarke says, realization hitting her.

"Needed everyone to think we're dead." Finn comments.

"And all that, _whatever the hell we want_? You just care about saving your own skin." Clarke scoffs. She looks to me waiting for me to say something but I already knew.

"You knew. You knew and you didn't care to share?" Finn scolds. I glare at him.

"It wasn't my secret to tell, now back off." I turn back to face Bellamy and he's staring again.

"Hey, shooter, where's my radio?" Raven gets in front of me and gets in his face. I'm not a fan of it but if it can get him to give us the radio then It's fine by me.

"Get out of my way." He tells her as he tries to walk off.

"I should've killed you when I had the chance." He said. Disappointment flooded through me, that's not the Bellamy I know.

"Really? Well I'm right here. Where's my radio?" She yelled and he pushed her up against the tree pushing her neck with his arm

"Okay, stop it." Finn comes up pushing Bellamy off of Raven.

"Jaha deserved to die, you all know that." Bellamy straightens out his jacket.

"He's not my favorite person either, but he's not dead." Raven says and my eyes widen. Jaha is not dead. Bellamy didn't kill him, this just proves all the more that Bellamy isn't a killer. He never was.

"What?" He asks, shock taking over his features.

"You're a lousy shot." Raven shrugs.

"Bellamy, don't you see what this means? You're not a murderer." I walk up to him and place my hand on his arm. I might still be mad at him for what he said last night and for jacking the radio but I know what he needs to hear right now.

"You always did what you had to do to protect your sister." I say looking in his eyes.

"That's who you are. And you can do it again, by protecting three-hundred of your people." I tell him.

"Where's the radio?" Clarke asks him softly.

"It's too late." He breaks his gaze with me and looks away.

"What do you mean?" Finn questions him. Bellamy meets my eyes again.

"I threw it in the stream." I take my hand off his shoulder and step back right away.

"Taylor..." He tries.

"Show us." Is all I say. He sighs and nods. He leads us to the lake and points in the direction in which he threw it.

"Help us find it." I tell him, he nods. All of us four walk into the steam searching around for it. Me and Raven go off one way and the others split up.

"Well you seem to have him wrapped around your finger." Raven says when we're far from them.

"What are you talking about?" I ask her as I reach down into the water thinking I found it but it's just some moss.

"He listens to you." She tells me and I shrug.

"Not really, he just knows that he messed up. Bellamy will do something if he knows it's the right thing to do, he just needs an extra push sometimes." I explain to her.

"And that person who pushes him is you." She states.

"Guess so."

"Are you guys... you know..." My eyes widen at her and she laughs.

"Oh my god, no!" I groan in frustration. Why does everyone think me and Bellamy have a thing?

"Whatever you say." She says letting it go. Thank god. I think I've had enough Bellamy talk for one day.

"I found it!" We hear Finn shout and we run over to him. Raven snatches the radio out of his hands and looks at it.

"Will you be able to fix it?" Clarke asks Raven as she inspects it some more.

"Maybe. But it'll take half a day to dry out the components to see what's broken."

Bellamy cuts in, "Like I said, it's too late."

"Do you have any idea what you did? Do you even care?" I yell shoving him but he barely stumbles back.

"I helped." He clenched his jaw.

"After you threw it in the stream! I told you nothing good could come out of keeping them from coming down here, now innocent people are going to die! That's on you." I scream at him and walk away in the direction that we came from to head back to camp.

"Taylor..." He says. I don't turn around I just keep walking forward. I want to get back to camp and I've got a long walk. There's no way in hell I'll be able to walk with him.

I think I'm almost 5 miles away from the camp because I started noticing things we passed on our way to the pod. It started to get a little dark but only because the sun was being blocked by clouds and trees. As I'm walking I trip on a tree root and I go flying down a little hill. I land on some rigid rocks and a sharp sting in my leg makes me look down. A rock had snagged my skin and it looked deep enough to have to get stitches. Blood was oozing out and I started to feel dizzy. My eyes started to droop and before I knew it everything was black.  
  
  


"Taylor. Taylor, wake up! Come on, Taylor, please wake up!" I feel someone shaking me. My eyes open. I see that I'm lying on a floor in some cave? I slowly get up and turn to my side and see Octavia.

"Octavia? What happened? Where are we?" I ask her. Looking around some more I try to get up but something restricts me. It's a chain on one of my hands and one of my feet. I start to panic as I struggle to get out of them.

"Taylor, stop. I've tried everything. Stop." She begs for me to stop and I do.

"He brought you in here an hour ago, I've been trying to wake you up since." She tells me.

"He who?"

"A grounder." We're so screwed.  
  
  


"He's coming." I hear her whisper and I keep my eyes focused on the entrance. All of a sudden a tall African decent of a man walks in. I swallow hard. There's an actually real life grounder right in front of us. He notices I'm up and he turns around and grabs a cup from the table in the corner. I notice the many tattoos he has and if we weren't in this situation I would actually be admiring them.

He walks over to me and offers the cup to me. I look at Octavia and she nods her head. I take the cup and drink the water. It's pretty cold and it feels so good going down my dry throat. He takes it back and fills it up with more water and offers it to Octavia. She grabs it and drinks and he puts it up. Then he goes and grabs a jar full of some type of jelly substance and walks over to me. I flinch when he reaches toward my leg but he continues anyway and rolls up my jeans. The gash that I had is still there but it seemed to stop bleeding. He opened up the jar and put some of the substance on his fingers and then started to rub it around my gash. I cringe at the pain and burn the gel brings but I don't say anything too afraid that he could kill me at any moment if he wanted to.

He rubbed it in till it was almost nothing and then he got up and put it away. I saw him grab the knife and my heart dropped. Is he going to kill us now? He looked at me and then walked over to the fire and stuck the knife in it. He waited awhile till the knife was blazing orange and I knew what he was going to do. He was going to close the gash up for me. But I didn't want it like this. Why is he helping us? Why can't he just let us go if he's trying to help us. He comes toward me with the knife and I shake my head.

"Please, no. No. No. Please don't." I shake my head and tears started to fall down my cheeks. I knew my cut had to be closed or it could get infected but I don't want to face the burn of the knife. He looks sorry for a moment but then he regains composure and he grabs my legs.

"No! No! Stop!" I yell at him but he holds my leg down to keep me from moving and he presses the blade down on my skin. I scream out in pain. It's unlike anything I've ever felt before. I start sweating and my screaming doesn't stop. He doesn't lift off till a couple of seconds later and I almost pass out. I can smell burnt skin and it's enough to make me nauseated. Tears are flowing out from the immense pain and after he lifts the knife up it burns even more.

"Taylor, you're okay. It's okay." Octavia says. I almost forgot she was there. She grabs my hand and I squeeze her hand. The grounder gets up and puts the knife to the side and grabs a different jar. He puts whatever substance was in this jar on his fingers and gently rubs it in the burn area. For a second it stings and then it feels like ice pressed to my skin and I sigh in relief. He's helping me with the pain. But why? After he's rubbed it in he pulls my jean back down. He puts his stuff away and grabs a couple of other things and he walks out. I wait a few minutes till I know that he's gone and I speak.

"Why is he helping me?" I ask Octavia.

"He helped me too. He cleaned my cuts and put the same stuff on them for me. But my cuts weren't deep enough to have to get it closed up." She explains to me.

"I don't understand."

"Me neither, but we have to get out of here." She says and I nod in agreement.

I hope everyone is looking for us because it doesn't look like we will be getting out of these chains anytime soon without help. We hear some noise coming from the hallway and me and Octavia share a look. It sounds like more than one person and my heart beats faster, terrified that he has brought more grounders with him. But who walks into view makes me almost cry tears of joy. In front of us was Bellamy. He rushed over to both of us and looks at us probably making sure we were okay. Finn and Jasper and a guy named Jake walks in behind him.

"Get the key, hurry. He should be getting back soon." Octavia tells them and they grab the key from the table and pass it to Bellamy. Bellamy unlocks Octavia's first and she gives him a hug when she's released. He then comes over to me and unlocks my chains.

"I've never been more happier to see you in my life." I pull him into a hug and he hugs back.

"Oh, princess." He sighs and it feels nice to be in his arms.

"I still hate you." I say pulling away and I can tell he knows I'm half joking by his light smile.

"Let's go now." Octavia says but before we can leave, the grounder walks in. He goes to attack the closest person by him which happens to be Bellamy. They fight around until he's got a spear pointed at Bellamys throat and Bellamys putting all his strength into holding it from piercing his neck. I was about to do something till Jasper grabbed a piece of thick wood and whacked the grounder over the head with it making him fall to the floor. I helped Bellamy get up.

"Okay, now let's really go." Jasper says still with a look of shock on his face from hitting the grounder. We start to walk away but Finn is looking at something on the grounder. He keeps leaning in closer and before we know it the grounder gets up and stabs Finn in the stomach. Bellamy quickly grabs the wood and he hits the grounders head making him fall back down.

"Oh my god. Okay, everyone help Finn. We need to get back to camp now." I order and they all nod.

"Shouldn't we take the knife out?" Jasper asks.

"No! No! Just be very careful with him. Let's go now." I tell them. I make sure they walk in front of me so that they are the first ones out. But before I go I take the two jars of medicine he had. I'm sure he won't mind. I run out with them and we start to rush to get back to camp. Finally we get to it and the entrance opens up for us.

"Clarke!" I call for her and she comes out of the dropship eyes wide when she sees Finn.

"He got stabbed, the bleeding is minimum but he doesn't have much time if we don't get it out and close up the wound." I tell her and she nods.

"Bring him in." She tells the guys and we all enter the dropship and they place him down on the table. Me and Clarke start shouting things we need people to get for us.

"Did your dad show you how to diagnosis in a situation like this?" Clarke asks me.

"A little, we didn't cover this stuff much because it wasn't too likely for these things to happen on the ark. I know that if there's no liquid around the wound then it didn't puncture anything major." She lifts up his shirt so it can stay above the knife and we take a look. No liquid. Thank god.

"What happened?!" Raven busts in coming over to see Finn. She looks so worried and stressed and I feel extremely sorry for her.

"Raven, listen to me. I need my mom to walk me through this. You need to fix the radio. Now." Clarke tells her directly and Raven takes a moment to nod and quickly rushes to the radio in the corner and gets to work.

"What else did your dad tell you?" Clarke asks me. As I'm trying to think people start to gather in the dropship. Miller walks in and walks over to us.

"There's a storm coming." He tells us. This can not get any worse.

"Okay, gather everyone in here and shut the door." I tell him and he nods and walks out. Octavia walks through with a bottle of alcohol like we requested. She hands it to me and I take a whiff. My face scrunches up, this stuff is strong.

"Raven we need that radio now." I tell her as I hold the table steady from the grumbles of the storm.

"Please...calling ark station..the hundred are alive." Raven says desperately into the radio for the thousandth time.

"This is a restricted station. Who is this? Please identify yourself." A male speaks up and I smile.

We're in contact with the ark again.


	9. IX.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I miss writing notes at the end but I feel like on ao3, most people write their notes at the beginning and i feel like people read them more when they are at the beginning. Maybe I'll start writing them at the end because I don't like giving anything away.

_"Some things you can never leave behind. They don't belong to the past. They belong to you."_   
  
  
  
  


**9.**   
  
  
  
  


The loud thunder and rain hitting the dropship makes it hard for anyone to hear clearly, but Raven continues to speak into the radio.

"This is Raven Reyes from mecha station. I'm on the ground. The hundred are alive. I need to speak to Doctor Abby Griffin." She says.

"Raven?" A voice comes through.

"Mom?" Clarke questions and turns her head towards the radio, happiness taking over her features.

"Clarke? It's me." Clarke's mom says and Clarke grabs the radio and explains our situation.   
Abby starts to explain what we have to do just as Miller walks in.  
Miller comes over, "That's everyone, but Monty and Jasper aren't back. And neither is Bellamy." 

"They will find somewhere to ride out the storm, close the door." I tell him. He nods and pulls the lever and the door starts to close.

"I have to pull it out." Clarke tells me. I nod encouraging her. She grabs on the handle and starts to pull up when the dropship shakes form the storm causing her to pull it out rapidly. The wound leaked a little blood but she did it.

"You did it, Clarke!" I exclaim and she smiles. I grabbed the jelly stuff I took from the grounder and I started to place it around his wound. 

"Here's the needle and some wire." Octavia says coming down from the second floor. She hands them to Clarke but Clarkes hands are shaking so I take them from her. 

"I'll do it." I say and she steps back and takes a sip of the moonshine. I carefully start to stitch him up and then I cut and tie the wire at the end. 

"He's going to make it." I say and Raven smiles. It seems like the rain had stopped so I opened the door and people filed out. After almost everyone left Bellamy walks in with two guys behind him carrying someone, the grounder who took me and Octavia. Octavia walks up to him.

"'The hell are you doing?" She yells at him.

"It's time to get some answers." Bellamy crosses his arms.

"Oh, you mean revenge?" Octavia scoffs.

"I mean Intel." He turns to the two guys who carried the grounder in. "Get him up stairs."   
I walk up to Bellamy.

"Bellamy, stop this." I exclaim. I was happy to see him for a short time and then he goes and does something stupid like always. It's a never ending cycle. 

"Princess, this has to be done." He tries to touch my arm but I back up.

"This isn't who we are." I shake my head. He looks hurt from my rejection but I'm glad. Suddenly Clarke's mom comes through the radio again and Clarke talks to her. Bellamy looks surprised at the sound of the radio, I know he knows this means they are coming down. 

"It is now." He says and goes upstairs. What a jackass.   
As Clarke is speaking with her mom I decided to go up to the second floor to see what they were doing. I open up the latch and Jake is blocking me. 

"What do you need?" He questions.

"If you don't let me up..." I threaten. His eyes go wide and he lifts the opening all the way stepping aside. I climb up. The grounder is chained up, he's shirtless and he's got scars littering his body and many tattoos. I see that it's just Bellamy, Octavia, and two other guys.

"Go downstairs, princess. I don't want you to see this." He grabs a seat belt and wraps it around his hand. 

"Bellamy, stop. You can't do this." I shake my head and walk up to him.

"I have too."

"No you don't, he helped me and Octavia. He didn't hurt us." I try to reason with him. There's no reason we should harm this grounder. Sure, he chained us up but who wouldn't take that precaution with someone they don't know.

"He still held you guys against your will." He explained and walks over to the grounder.

"Bellamy, we told you he helped us. If it weren't for him Taylor could have bled to death." Octavia butts in. 

"I'm sorry, but he won't talk and we need information. It's not about revenge." Bellamy tells her. He walks closer to the grounder and he lashes the seat belt at him. I hear the sound and know he's hit bone. The grounder doesn't make noise but his face twitches in pain. Bellamy strikes him again but he doesn't say anything. This is an ugly side of Bellamy I do not wish to see ever.

"Bellamy, stop!" I yell but he does it again as he keeps asking questions. I can't stand here and let this happen, I see Octavia close to tears in the corner. As Bellamy goes to strike again I step in front of the grounder last minute and the seat belt strikes me on my chest. The pain is excruciating as I drop to the floor, I scream out in agony as I see Bellamy and Octavia rush over towards me. 

"No, no, no. Princess, I didn't mean to hit you. No. I'm sorry. You jumped in the way. Oh my god. I'm so sorry." Bellamy rambles off apologizing but I can't be bothered to listen to him.

"Stop this, Bellamy. Don't do this." I don't leave him with much choice as I hold a hand over the the left side of my chest just right below my collarbone. If he would've hit it, it would have broken. 

"Okay, okay." He says with tears in his eyes. He grabs a hold of my face and looks in my eyes.

"I'm so sorry, are you okay?" He repeats.

"No, it hurts. But-" I start to speak but Clarke bursts in yelling directly toward the grounder,

"What's on the knife?!" 

"Clarke, slow down, what are you talking about?" I say getting off the floor while still holding my chest. It's throbbing and now I'm wondering if that was such a good idea. Probably not but it got Bellamy to stop.

"The knife. It's poisoned. Finn could die." She says.

"What's on the knife?!" Bellamy yells at the grounder. He doesn't answer and keeps the same expression through the whole thing.  
Bellamy goes and grabs the seat belt again.

"Bellamy, no!" Me and Octavia yell at the same time. Bellamy goes and grabs a pouch and opens it up. They turn out to be little vials, one of the 5 must be the antidote for the poison. 

"Finn, could die if he doesn't tell us!" Bellamy shouts at us. He looks at Clarke and Clarke nods her head, giving him the okay to torture him. Bellamy asks him which antidote it is but he doesn't answer so he strikes him. He does three more times till Raven comes in.

"Finns breathing, but who knows when he will stop again. Did you find out?" She points her question towards Clarke.

"He won't talk." Clarke tell hers. Raven glares at the grounder and walks over to a panel to the side of the grounder.  
Raven starts to pull wires out of the wall, "Want to bet?" 

"What are you doing?" Bellamy questions the girl.

"Showing him something new." She touches two wires together and they spark. No. I step over to her.

"No, Raven, you can't do this. Don't." I try to convince her but she tries to get past me.

"Get out of my way, Taylor." Raven yells.  
But I stand my guard. Before I knew what she was doing she puts the wires to my stomach and my whole body clenches from the new pain. I fall to the floor for the second time today and I put my head against the floor. For a second I couldn't breathe but then I catch up with my breath and inhale and start coughing. I feel sick and dizzy, almost as if I'm going to pass out.

"Taylor, get up." Octavia helps me stand up, I get a little wobbly but she helps me. Raven had already electrocuted the grounder but he still wouldn't speak. She kept doing it till finally Octavia left my side and walked over to the grounder but not before taking the knife out of Clarkes hand. 

"Raven, stop." Octavia says and Raven looks at her. Everyone gets quiet when Octavia cuts down her arm with the poisoned knife. 

"Octavia!" Bellamy yells at her with wide eyes. 

"He won't let me die." She says calmly and kneels on the ground. The grounder looks upset. I knew he wasn't ever trying to hurt us, especially Octavia, he was just trying to help.

"Which one is it?" She starts pointing to the vials until she points to one and he nods his head in defeat. She grabs it and hands it to Clarke and her and Raven rush down the ladder. 

"Octavia..." Bellamy tries to speak to her but she cuts him off.

"No. Don't. We told you he helped us. Yet you tortured him anyway." Octavia shakes her head at him and walks down the ladder. He turns to look at me and I roll my eyes and follow her. As I get down I see Bellamy coming down too. 

"Stop okay? We had to do what we did to save Finn's life." Bellamy explained to me and Octavia.

"It didn't even matter in the end because it wasn't you who saved his life. It was Octavia." I yell in frustration.

"I know that!" He yells back.

"You know, besides the grounder, Taylor was the one tortured. She just wanted to make peace but you all think violence is always the answer and ended up hurting her in the process." Octavia yells at them and everyone stays quiet. 

"Octavia they are monsters." Bellamy says quietly and before Octavia can speak I laugh in irony.

"Says the one who was holding the weapon and using it against the defenseless man." I say and walk out of the drop ship.  
  
  
  
  
  
  


I sit at the guard watch taking Millers place, I told him I needed the distraction and he agreed. My chest hurt so bad still but I tried to ignore it. I did touch it and I know there's a cut in the middle and if I look down I can see some bruising so what I can't see most be bruised really bad. The electricity did not help either, I still feel very sick but the cool breeze calms me.

"Hey, Taylor, are you okay?" Octavia climbs up on the post and sits by me as we watch the woods.

"No..." I shake my head. I bite my lip to keep myself from crying.

"Hey, look. Take this. It helps with the pain." Octavia hold up a vial with blackish liquid.

"How do you know?" I take it from here.

"Lincoln told me." She said. I make a face wondering who the hell is Lincoln and then it hits me. 

"The grounder? He spoke to you?" I ask her in shock.

"Yeah, he told me to tell you thank you for trying to help him. And he told me that would help you." She pointed to the vial in my hand. I popped it open and drink half of it, who knows when we'll need the other half.

"So my brother..." Octavia starts,

"Are you doing okay with that?" 

"With what?" 

"With Bellamy, I know you guys have something going on." She says. I shake my head.

"We don't, but I'm fine. I just wish he would stop being an arrogant selfish dick." I say sincerely and Octavia laughs.

"Keep on wishing." She tells me and it's my turn to laugh. 

"Go get some sleep, you've had the longest day in history. You deserve sleep." She pushes me to go and I thank her and walk over to my tent and enter in. I take off my shoes and jacket like always and lay my head down on my jacket and cover myself with the blanket. I couldn't fall asleep though, my body ached and I felt sick to my stomach. Through the pain I cant' help but wonder if my parents would be proud, I did what I thought was right even if I was getting hurt in the process, just as my mom did when she stole to help sick patients.  
  
  
  
  
  


_"But you were trying to help them! You just wanted to help!" I cry into my moms shoulder as she hugs me tighter to her._

_"I know, I know. But I broke the law, I have to take responsibility." She brushes my hair out of my face. I only had so little time with her before they take her away to be floated. I was extremely close with my mom, she was my best friend aside from Monty and Jasper. She only ever wanted to do good and help people like my dad, she didn't deserve this._

_"I don't want you to go." I shake my head as more tears fall down my face._

_"Hey, I'm not going anywhere, I will always be with you and your father. Always remember that, It's time now. I love you." She pulls me into another hug and I wrap my arms tightly around her. She gets pulled away by the guards and out of the room, I quickly follow behind with my dad. Jaha and_ _Kane are at the end of the hall standing next to the lever that opens the department to be floated in. When I see it more tears roll down my face, my dad grabs my hand and squeezes._

_"Grace Queen,_ _you are sentenced to death after stealing herbs from the medical wing, anything you want to say?" Jaha spoke. His expression never changed, as if he wasn't taking away a mother and a wife. I squeezed my dads hand tighter as my mom shook her head and walked forward into the vault. The seal closed behind her and she turned around to face us. She wasn't crying, she wore a sad smile toward me and my dad. Jaha nodded to Kane and Kane put his hand on the lever, waited for a second and then pushed down. The other side of the vault opened and before I could see my mom get sucked into space I buried my head into my dads shoulder and let out a sob._


	10. X.

_"All I have to do is surrender. All I have to do is trust, and I will endure."_   
  
  
  
  


**10.**   
  
  
  


"Hey T, we heard what happened, are you okay?" Monty and Jasper question me as I eat my nuts and berries. Last night was a whirlwind and I was trying to forget about it but my chest throbbed constantly, reminding me of the events of last night.

"I've been better." I shrug.

"Well, I made you something." Jasper says handing me a cup filled with blackish brownish liquid.

"What is it?" I ask him taking a whiff of it. It smells of vanilla and coffee bean, I eye Jasper curiously wondering if it could actually be coffee. He then confirms my suspicion.

"It's coffee." He smiles and my eyes go wide.

"Seriously?" I take a sip of it right away and the liquid is actually warm and it almost tastes exactly like the coffee on the ark. But better. The bitter but rich flavor relaxed me and instantly put me into a better mood.

"Thank you so much!" I pull Jasper and Monty into a hug. They always know how to cheer me up without actually having to say anything.

"Oh and Miller told me to tell you that everyone is talking to their families on the computer system we set up last night. He said if you wanted to talk to your dad you can." Monty explains to me. For a second I'm happy that finally I can talk to my dad but I realized that I haven't even talked to him in 3 years. He never once visited me in the skybox, I knew he always had access because he had visited sick prisoners before. But he never once came to see me, I don't know why. I never knew why. Maybe I can get some answers.

"Thanks, I'll go do that right now." I tell them as I walk over to the dropship while still taking sips of my coffee.

"Hey, Connor is just about to say goodbye to his parents then you can get on." Miller tells me, there's a parachute blocking us from the computer so everyone can get privacy with their families. Connor pops out and nods to Miller.

"You're up, just tell whoever is on the screen who you want to talk to." Miller tells me and I nod and go in. A lady with black hair and faint grey hairs is sitting on the other end, must be Connor's mom. I smile as I sit down.

"Can you get me Dr. Queen." I tell her. She smiles and gets up. As I'm waiting I notice someone come into view and sit down. The guy has a guards uniform on and when the camera shows his face my eyes widen. It's Jack. I thought after Monty and Jasper gave me coffee that my day would be going better. Obviously not.

"Hey, babe." He smirks.

"Don't call me that, what do you want? Where's my dad?" I ask. I would've gotten up and left but I wanted to talk to my dad.

"What? You don't miss me?"

"Not one bit."

"Look, we'll be coming down there soon enough. And you won't be locked up anymore and maybe..." He smiled but it lacked confidence. He always had a nice smile, the kind that a girl can just swoon over, it's what pulled me in. Yes, Jack was very attractive. He had brown hair that he usually styled up, he has blue grey eyes, and his jaw line is very prominent. He was around Bellamy's height and had a decent build but I couldn't help but compare him to Bellamy. Bellamy was just better in all aspects. Even if he's a jackass at the moment. When I first met Jack I thought he was hot as hell but his personality makes him ugly and I can't stand the sight of him.

"You're insane if you think that's going to happen. We are never going to happen again. Now, let me talk to my dad." I explain hoping maybe it will get through to him. I can't believe he's talking about this right now. Hasn't he heard what's going on down here? There's no time for any of this drama.

"Just wanted to talk..." He says standing up and walking out the door. I ignore his comment and wait patiently for my dad to come in sight, a few minutes go by and I see the door open up on the camera and my dad walks in. He's wearing dark jeans and a black sweater along with some boots that he's had since before I got locked up. I stay quite until he gets in front of the camera and sits down. His face is almost like I remember it, but he has many more frown lines and bags hang heavy under his eyes. His once dark brown hair has gotten lighter and I can see grey hairs. I don't know what to say, I'm guessing he doesn't either because he stays quiet and just stares. I decided it would be best if I just say something to clear the air a bit.

"Hi, dad." The word dad sounds so foreign coming out of my mouth, I haven't said it in ages. He breaks out into a light smile and I can't help but smile back.

"Hi, my sweet girl." He says and my heart warms. I don't know what else to say but I didn't have to because he spoke.

"So I heard you've been saving lives and showing leadership. You're just like your mother." He laughs, and I didn't realize how much I missed it till now. A tear threatens to fall but I blink it away.

"I wouldn't say that but I'm helping out as much as I can." I shrug. I wouldn't say I'm a leader, that's more Bellamys thing. And I wouldn't say I've saved lives but I've helped Clarke with things.

"Nonsense, Jaha told me that Clarke spoke very highly of you to him and that you are helping save lives. I'm proud of you." Hearing him say he was proud of me reassured me that maybe everything will be fine, and that I'm doing good down here. I'm so glad we can talk before he comes down here.

"Thanks dad... I..uh..can I ask you something?" I start to get serious, if I don't get answers I'll be wondering for forever.

"Of course."

"Why didn't you ever come to visit me?" I wait for his response, he looks at me confused for a moment before answering.

"What do you mean? I thought you blamed me for getting you locked up, I thought you hated me." He says, now it's my turn to be confused.

"I never blamed you, ever. I love you. Why would you assume that?" I question. How could he assume something like that? I was the one who decided to steal to help.

"Because Jack told me..." He starts. I wanted to kill Jack. He's the very reason that me and my father lost connection for 3 years.

"Dad, no. Jack is a liar. Don't trust anything he says. Ever." I clarify with him.

"So none of it is true?" I mentally thank him for not asking any questions about Jack because I would have to explain everything and It's so not important right now.

"No, dad, of course not. I love you and I would never blame you for something I voluntarily did." I tell him.

"I love you too, sweetie. Keep saving lives down there and stay safe. I'll be on the first exodus ship down." My heart leaps at the fact that my dad will be here soon and I almost want to scream but I refrain from doing so and say goodbye to him. I walk out and Miller is standing there with a guy I haven't seen around, he walks in and takes my place though.

"Bellamy was just here looking for you, he told me to tell you when you were done to come find him." Miller smirks and I roll my eyes.

"Thanks." I walk out the dropship as he laughs. I look around for him but can't seem to find him until I spot him talking to Octavia by the food barrels. I walk over to them and Octavia smiles at me and says bye to Bellamy and leaves.

"You were looking for me?" I question with no emotion in my face. I'm still so upset from what he did last night and I know he knows.

"Uh yeah, There's a bomb shelter not too far from here and Clarke said we should go check it out." Bellamy says clearing his throat and stuffing rations of food into his backpack.

"Why can't she go?" I cross my arms, I really don't feel like being stuck with him for a field trip.

"Because someone has to watch camp." He now stands waiting for my reply.

"What about Finn? Or Miller? Or someone else who is not me?"

"Please come with me." He pleads and I know I shouldn't give in so easily. But I do.

"Fine. When do we leave?" I ask him crossing my arms. He looks shocked that I even agreed and then his expression goes back to normal.

"Whenever you finish packing, we're looking at a day trip." He explains to me and continues stuffing nuts and berries in his pack.

"If we're only going for a day, why are you packing for a whole month?" I exaggerate.

But in my defense he is packing more than enough food for only one day.

"You never know what can happen." He shrugs and zips up his pack. I eye him wearily and decide to ignore it and just get my stuff. I don't pack any food because Bellamy obviously has that covered but I take my knife cause that's all I need. And frankly, it's all I got. I walk in the dropship and Bellamy is talking to Octavia, probably about Lincoln, the grounder.

"Whatever twisted connection you think you have with that animal, forget it. You don't get to see him. End of conversation." He states firmly.

"Why do you even care if I ruined your life? You should want me to go up there. Maybe you'll get lucky and he'll kill me, problem solved." Octavia shrugs crossing her arms.

"Octavia, you know I didn't mean that." Bellamy tilts his head. Something I noticed he does when he starts to get sentimental. He told her that she ruined his life? That's terrible and really low. I know I probably shouldn't be surprised because of things he has said in the past but honestly I am. His sister means everything to him and for him to say something like that to her. I really don't know Bellamy Blake at all. I decide to interrupt their arguing to save Octavia from Bellamy.

"Hey, I'm ready. Let's head out." I say walking up to him, he looks at me and nods and turns back and looks at Octavia.

"Miller, make sure no one gets in or out of the second floor." Bellamy calls to Miller hanging around in the dropship.

"Got it." Miller nods towards him and climbs up to the second floor.

"Bellamy." Clarke enters in the dropship.

"The answer is still no, I'm not talking to Jaha." Bellamy rolls his eyes.

"You're going to have to sooner or later." Clarke explains to him.

He disregards what she says, "Taylor and I are heading out to the depot. Hold the fort down while we're gone." Bellamy jokes and I almost see a smile from Clarke.

"Stay safe, guys." She nods to both of us and I nod back. Bellamy walks out but I stay in for a second and walk over to Clarke.

"Why won't Bellamy talk to Jaha?" I question her.

"He's afraid Jaha won't pardon him." She said. I can't blame Bellamy, he did shoot the guy and to think Jaha will pardon him is a bit of a stretch.

"Maybe you can talk some sense into him. You're good with him. He listens to you." She adds. Where does everyone get this idea from that Bellamy actually listens to me? He hardly does. I nod at her anyway and turn and walk out toward the entrance where Bellamy was standing.

"Ready?" He asked.

"No, but let's go." I walk past him.

Silence. That's all it's been for the past hour. The only sounds come from the birds whistling and the leaves on the trees rustling from the breeze that goes by. I was about to break the silence when my chest ached in pain. I left out a noise and stopped walking. Bellamy whipped his head around and took a step closer towards me.

"Does it still hurt?" He asks looking at the purple and black bruising that has formed along with the cut in the middle. I had a chance to take a real look at it this morning in my reflection in a barrel of water.

"Obviously you jackass." I roll my eyes at him. The pain passed after a few minutes and I went back to being okay other than it stinging every once in awhile but it's been doing that all night and morning.

"Sorry." He says and we continue walking. I roll my eyes at his lack of words. Sorry? Really? Where's his usual snarky comment? He's been acting a little strange today.

"So are you seriously not going to talk to Jaha?" As soon as the question leaves my mouth Bellamy groans.

"You and Clarke need to let it go. I don't want to talk to him. He's not going to pardon me. What's the point." He says as we step over a log in our path.

"You don't know that, Bellamy, it doesn't hurt to try." I explain to him. Although he is a jackass I still feel for the guy. Weird, I know. Actually it's not weird because I like him. Although, sometimes I wish I didn't.

"Can we talk about something else?"

I sigh.

"Sure. Like what?"

"Like Jack." He says.

My throat tightens and I hold my breath.

"What about Jack?" He's treading on dangerous waters here.

"What happened?"

I take a deep breath in and start, "It's complicated."

"What does that mean?" He asks.

"He was just a dick half the time and he was only using me for sex."

"He used you?" He's looking straight into my eyes and it makes me feel warm. His eyes are beautiful.

"Yeah. It's fine now. I'm fine now." I look down feeling vulnerable and a little embarrassed. Jack only wanted me physically. 

"It's not fine. He deserves to be floated. Is he coming down here? I'll kill him." Bellamy rambles and runs his hands through his hair looking down. I laugh lightly. He does care.

"Bellamy, calm down. It's over now. He is coming down here. He told me when I talked to him this morning." His head snaps up at my words.

"You talked to him? Why?"

"I didn't have much of a choice. But it's fine, Bellamy. Look, let's keep walking. The more we keep stopping the longer the trip." I say and grab his arm and make him start walking. 

"I'm still going to kill him when he gets down here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who else loves jealous Bellamy Blake???


	11. 11.

_"To hold on, you have to find something you're willing to die for."_   
  
  
  
  


**11.**   
  
  
  
  


"We're here." Bellamy puts down the map and in front of us is the depot, or what is left of it. It's all just ruins of what use to be here.

"Let's split up, shout if you find something." Bellamy tells me and I nod and walk to my right as he walks to his left. I walk around chunks of metal and concrete hoping to find something until I trip when something catches my foot. I smack into the ground and groan in pain from the impact. I look at my foot and see what I tripped over, a latch.

"Found it." I yell to Bellamy while slowly getting off the ground and wiping dirt off of me. Bellamy walks into view and looks me up and down.

"What happened?" He asks.

"I tripped, good news I tripped over the handle." I move to the side to show him the handle and he tries to pull it up but it won't budge. He grabs his axe from his belt and raises it and slams it down on the handle making it unlock. He pulls open the door and let's me go first. What a gentlemen. I walk down the stairs and the place already creeps me out. There's spider webs and dust everywhere, it smells faintly of rusted metal.

"So much for living down here." Bellamy says behind me and I nod in agreement. We walk around but there's nothing. No signs of any supplies that will help us survive winter. Just barrels. 

"Damn it. Anything left down here is ruined anyway." He complains. I can tell he's getting angry. I try to make the situation better by looking more and I open one of the barrels.

"I found blankets." I say as I see what the barrel contains.

"Excited about a couple of blankets?" Bellamy asks angrily. Never mind I didn't help.

"Well, it's something." I sigh.

"How about a canteen or a med kit or a decent freaking tent?" He grunts pushing a barrel to the ground and it spills black liquid onto the floor while making a clacking noise. We both look at each other curiously and Bellamy bends down and grabs something from the liquid and holds it up. A gun.

"Oh my god." My eyes widen. Bellamy grins and stands up and opens the other barrels that all contain the black liquid and guns.

"This changes everything, no more running from spears. Ready to be a badass, princess?" He smirks.

"Already am, but I don't like this idea of having a bunch of criminal teenagers with guns in their hands. Just a thought though." I shrug and he laughs.

"We're lucky the rifles were packed in grease. The fact that they survived means we're not sitting ducks anymore. You need to learn how to do this." He hands me a rifle. I guess he's the only one who doesn't know I know how to use a gun because of Jack. But I'll let him play teacher for a bit. It's fun and actually kind of cute. He grabs a blanket and marks an X on it with the grease and he hangs it up in front of us.

"So I just hold it on my shoulder like this?" I try to act clueless and hold it a little bit too low on purpose.

"Yeah just a little bit higher." He gets behind me and sets the gun the right way on my shoulder and tilts it up. His breath is right on my neck and it sends shivers down my back. I'm now trying to decide if pretending I didn't know how to use a gun was a good idea or a bad one.

"Uh that's good, watch and learn." He pulls away and I immediately want him back again. I've got it bad. He grabs another rifle from one of the barrels and lifts it up getting in the perfect position and shoots but nothing comes out. He stops his stance and pulls the gun down inspecting it.

"Still watching." I joke.

"My bullets are duds. Try yours." He nods his head setting his gun down and crossing his arms. I get into the position Jack taught me and I raised the gun. I eye the center of the X and fire the gun. The bullet ran straight through the middle of the X and I turn to Bellamy smirking.

"Lucky first shot." He shrugs and I raise the gun while still looking at him and shoot without looking at the target. I turn to see I got it right beside the hole I had just made. Bellamys eyes widen and then he glares at me.

"You knew how to shoot, didn't you?"

"Yeah, Jack taught me." I nod my head and his jaw tightens when I mention Jack.

"Anyways, we need to talk about how we're gonna keeps guns around camp, where are we gonna keep them and who has access. You put Miller in charge of the grounder, you must trust him." I say setting the gun down and facing him. He swallows hard and faces me.

"You should keep him close. The others listen to him." Bellamy tells me.

I give him a strange look.

"I should keep him close? Bellamy, what's going on? You've been acting weird all day. All the rations you took..." As I finish, it hits me and I look up at him wide eyed. "You're gonna run. You were gonna load up on supplies and just disappear." I back away and put my hands to my head. He was going to leave. Leave us all. Leave me.

"I don't have a choice, princess, the ark will be here soon." His voice is so gentle like he's scared.

"So you're just going to leave Octavia?" I question. Octavia needs Bellamy.

"Octavia hates me. She'll be fine. You don't know, I shot the Chancellor. They're gonna kill me, princess. Best-case scenario, they lock me up with the Grounder for the rest of my life, and there's no way in hell I'm giving Jaha the satisfaction." He shakes his head. "I need some air." He says walking away from me. He can't just run. He can't do this. I decide to give him his space though instead of running after him. I need to clear my head for a second.  
  
  
  
  
  


"Taylor." A voice sounds through the room and my head whips around trying to find the source.

"Who's there?" I keep turning still trying to discover who the voice belongs to until I'm not in the depot anymore, I'm back on the ark. I'm in a jail cell, in my old cell. I can't be here, this isn't real. A rattling sound breaks me from my thoughts as I look over to the cell door and see two guards enter in. For a second their faces are blurry but then they come closer and I recognize them. They were the two guards I had killed.

"You don't look too happy to see us, Queen." The one on the right who goes by Mike says with an evil smirk.

"This isn't real, you guys are dead. I killed you both..I.." I shake my head trying to get rid of this nightmare.

"You did kill us, didn't you? No mercy at all. You're a monster." The other one known as John speaks up. Tears start to fall down my face and I don't think I can breathe. I set my hands on my knees and try to focus on my breathing but as I look down at my hands they are covered in blood. My eyes widen and try to get the crimson stains off my hands by rubbing them roughly against my jeans. It doesn't work though. I vaguely remember doing the same thing after I had killed them, I was in such shock I didn't even have time to process because more guards were on their way. I shake my head.

"No, I just wanted to help." I sob out. That's all I ever wanted to do, I never meant to kill anyone but I didn't want to get caught.

"Of course you did, you're just like your mother. But she's dead and soon, you will be too." Mike comes closer and before I know it he has his hands wrapped around my neck. He's squeezing tighter and tighter by the second. I try to pry his arms off of my neck but it's not working. My eyes get blurry from the crying and choking, I blink them away rapidly. Suddenly I'm not in the cell anymore, I'm in the depot again, the only difference is there's a different guy choking me. My eyes widen at the realization and I scratch at his face. It doesn't seem to work so I start I yelling out for help in hopes that Bellamy can hear me.

"Stop fighting me. I'm going to kill you and then Bellamy." He says and my eyes widen. Caught off guard he gets the chance to grab a gun and slam the butt of it into my head. All I remember is him getting up and then I blacked out.

I wake up with my head pounding. I see that I'm still lying on the ground on the depot. I get up groaning and I hear shouting going on outside. I quickly grab the gun I had shot with and run out ignoring the pain I was in. I go outside to see that night had already fallen. I heard grunts and yelling from my right and I walk up the little hill we walked down to get here. I see Bellamy and the guy who was choking me rolling on the ground fighting. I think his name was Dax, he had a gun in his hand but Bellamy was pointing it away from him and shots kept going off into trees. If they don't kill each other, grounders will because they are making a lot of noise.

"Put the gun down, Dax!" I yelled pointing my rifle at him. He turned towards me and starts to shoot. I quickly hide behind a tree and the shooting stops.

"I thought I took care of you." I hear him say and I peek to see Bellamy struggling to keep Dax from pointing the gun at him.

"Sorry but shumway said no witnesses." I heard him say to Bellamy. Shumway? Who is that? I sneak closer and I try to shoot but Dax puts Bellamy in front of him making it impossible not to hit Bellamy. I may be a good shot but I do not want to risk it. While Dax is too busy looking for me Bellamy trips him onto the ground and Dax struggles to get out of Bellamys grip. I see Bellamy looking around him until he picks something off the ground and he slams it into Dax's neck. I see Dax give up and start to choke. I run over to them and Bellamy gets off of him as Dax takes his last breath. Bellamy sits back leaning against the tree behind him and I go and sit by him. I turn to see his face, it's bloodied and covered with dirt and scratches.

"Are you okay?" I ask him as I put my hand on his arm. He looks at me.

"I know, stupid question." I laugh lightly and look down at the ground. We sit in silence for awhile. Until I can't take it anymore.

"Please don't go." I whisper. I feel tears starting to pool in my eyes and I know I won't be able to handle it if Bellamy leaves.

"I have to." He says.

"No, you don't. Octavia needs her brother. The camp needs you. We all need you..." I let the tears fall as I look to him. "I need you."

"No you guys don't. Look how far you've all come. You don't need me." I can see tears pool in his eyes and one tear silently slips from his eye.

"Bullshit. We've only come this far because of you. Don't leave Bellamy. I'll speak to Jaha with you. He will pardon you." I grab his face making him look at me. He looks so broken and defeated. I don't like seeing him like this, he's suppose to be the strong one.

"What if he doesn't?" He questions. I've never seen this look on Bellamy and it makes me hurt.

"Then I will run away with you. But you're not getting rid of me that easy." I shake my head smiling. He stares back at me for awhile until he gives me a smile back. That gives me all the answer that he's going to stay.

"I'm going to hold you to that, princess." He says making me grin.

"Let's get going. We have a long trip home." I say getting up and helping him up as well. I start to walk back to the depot until Bellamy pulls me into him.

"Thank you." He whispers and kisses me on the cheek. Fire ignites where his lips had touched and my stomach ties in knots.

"For what?" I barely get out the words from the sudden rush he caused.

"For being you, princess." He smiles.

The walk back to camp seemed way shorter than when we came but I figured that had to do with me and Bellamy being on a good note. Although a lot of it was silence, the silence was a comfortable one.

As we got to camp we could see the faint glow of fire and hear some people chatting.

"The grounder is gone!" I hear someone shout. I'm pretty positive that was Miller. Me and Bellamy give each other a look and walk into camp and towards the big group of people.

"Let the grounders come." Bellamy cuts them off as we walk up to the group with sacks filled with guns over our shoulders.

"We've been afraid of them for far too long. And why? Because of their knives and spears. Well I don't know about you. But I'm tired of being afraid." Bellamy finishes and looks to me. I nod at him as he does to me and we put the sacks of guns down along with the guns tied to rope. Everyone stares in awe.

"These are weapons, not toys and we have to be prepared to give them up to the guard when they get down here..." I say looking around at everyone. "But until then, they are going to help keep us safe." I finish. I look at everyone's faces, mostly everyone is happy. Until I get to Finn, he doesn't look to excited about the guns but I can't blame him since I wasn't either. Clarke is standing right next to him and she nods her head at me, giving me a light smile.

"And there are plenty more where these came from. Tomorrow we start training." Bellamy adds, "and if the grounders come, we're going to be ready to fight."

Bellamy calls Miller and Connor over and tells them to put the guns in the dropship for right now. They oblige and grab the sacks and head over to the drop ship. Bellamy turns to me and I do the same.

"You ready to talk to Jaha?" I hold my breathe. The longer he puts it off the longer it's going to worry him and I'm not going to lie it's going to worry me as well.

He nods his head and we both walk towards the dropship and enter the area where the monitor is. There's a guard sitting there so I ask for Jaha while me and Bellamy put on the headsets placed on the table in front of us. While we wait for Jaha I see that Bellamy looks nervous. He's bouncing his knee and twiddling his thumbs. I've never seen him like this. I place my hand on his to calm him down and he stops fidgeting and looks at me.

"You will be pardoned." I whisper and he nods his head.

I look back to the screen monitor to see Jaha come into view and take a seat.

"Bellamy Blake, I've been wanting to talk to you for quite some time now." He says calmly.

"Before you do, I'd like to say something. When you sent us down here. You sent us to die." I tell him but I know he already knows this.

"But most of us are still alive, and a large part of that is because of Bellamy. He's one of us and he deserves to be pardoned of his crimes just like the rest of us." I explain to Jaha. His expressions always makes it hard to tell what he's thinking so I wait.

"Miss Queen, I appreciate your point of view. But it's not that simple." Jaha says.

"It is if you want to know who on the ark wants you dead." Bellamy cuts in. I have to give him credit, he's smart to bargain that kind of thing. Jaha can't say no now. Well I mean he could but something tells me he wants to know who wants him dead.

Jaha looks like he's contemplating it and then finally he gets closer to the screen and speaks.

"Bellamy Blake, you are pardoned for your crimes."

I smile and look to Bellamy and his lips are pulled into a smile as well.  
  
  
  
  
  


"My friends, this is a historic Unity Day. Every year, we mark the moment our ancestors of the twelve stations joined to form the Ark, but this is the last time we do so while aboard her. Next year, on the ground." Jaha speaks on the monitor in front of what's the left of the 100.

"Right after we did all the work." Miller says from right beside me. I laugh and continue watching.

"Someone shut him up." Some kid shouted. I rolled my eyes.

"You shut up, no ones forcing you to watch." Raven yells from the food area while she's eating nuts and berries. As I'm looking at her she catches my eye and looks away. We're still not on good terms after she electrocuted me. I decided to tune Jaha out because we've all heard this before. Out of nowhere Jasper stands in the middle of camp holding a small barrel.

"Monty strikes again! Call this batch unity juice! Who's thirsty?" He yells making everyone rush up to him immediately. Oh my god Monty made moon shine. I walk up to Jasper after everyone gets their cup.

"Save any for your best friend?" I question him.

"Oh yeah Monty already had some." He joked and I laugh and slap his arm playfully.

"Ha ha very funny. Now pour me a cup, I need it." I say. He grabs one of our canteens and fills it with the poison and hands it to me.

"Thank you so much. Keep a tab open for me." I wink.

As I'm walking away he shouts, "Happy birthday!" My eyes widen and I turn to him and hit him.

"Shut up!" I yell as he rubs his arm.

"Okay, okay. It's not a big deal T." He tells me. I roll my eyes and start to walk away again.

"Don't tell anyone." I say loud enough so he can hear me.  
  
  
  


I walk over to the water station to get my regular canteen filled up with water. I walk in the tent and go over to the water and turn it on filling it up. I look into the bowl, the water is a little dirty but I can still see my reflection clearly and it's not pretty. My hair was a tangled mess and very oily, I had dirt and some blood on my face. I also see that I still had a bruise on my chest but the cut seemed to be fine. I need to wash off. I remember when we first got here and I explored a little, I stumbled across a stream. It's only a little over a mile away from camp, I can go and wash off real quick. I grab my canteens and make sure my knife is secure on my belt. I should actually get a gun from the drop ship too. I walk out the water tent and towards the drop ship. When I walk in I see Miller is in the corner sorting out the guns. I walk over to him and look around for one I want. Since I'm not going to far out I think a hand gun will do. I grab the closest one to me and check to see if there's bullets. When I see that there is I click it back into place and shove it in my pants.

"Going somewhere?" Miller asks and I nod.

"Yes, I'll be back in a little bit. I'll only be a mile out going north." I know I have to tell someone where I'm going in case anything happens here at camp or hell even me so everyone knows where to come looking.

"Okay. Be safe." He nods and I walk out and towards monty and Jasper who are still passing out moonshine.

"You guys wouldn't happen to have made some soap?" I question. They share a look.

"You happen to be in luck, I made some the other day but I haven't tested it out yet." Monty says making me follow him to his tent while Jasper keeps giving people moonshine. We enter his tent and he digs around blankets and other stuff he has and he finally pulls out a jar. I notice it's the jar I took from the grounder, I guess they used everything that was in it. He hands me the little jar, the color is a dark red color but I trust Monty. I open it up and smell it and the scent is heavenly.

"I made the scent with vanilla, and juice from honey suckle and I even threw in some crushed berry juice. I know it's safe for both hair and body I just don't know how well it will work." He explains to me.

"It's perfect! Thank you. I'll be back soon." I give him a hug but before I can walk out his tent he stops me,

"Happy Birthday T." I groan. He laughs as I walk out. I should've know that they would remember my birthday, I've only been celebrating with them for 8 years.

I throw the jar in my bag and walk out the front entrance of the gates. Every time I leave the camp I feel so vulnerable to any grounder who is lurking. But I also feel free and it feels nice to get away from everything for awhile. I continue to walk in silence enjoying the nice weather. After 15 minutes I finally arrive to the pond. It's as beautiful as it was last time, with rocks surrounding it and flowers growing alongside the water. I had tested it last time I came and it was deep enough to go below my breast but nothing further.   
  
  


I set my bag down and I take off my shoes first and then my pants and shirt. I keep my underwear and bra on and I slide in.

The water is colder than I expected and it wakes me up and sends shivers down my spine. I duck my head underwater making sure I get most of the mud and blood that has piled on from being here off. I run my hands over my face rejoicing in the cool water on my skin. It feels amazing.

I grab the jar that I set on the rock and I pour a bit of the sticky substance into my hand. I rub it in my hands then place it in my wet hair and I start scrubbing. Surprisingly it does get bubbly but not a lot. The scent is strong and it makes me relax. After a couple of minutes of trying to scrub in the soap to get my hair clean as possible I duck my head underwater and I stay there for a few seconds scrubbing my hair in the water. I come back up and continue getting all the soap out. Once I get it all out I get more soap and start to wash my body. I spread it from my shoulders and neck and underarms.

I go towards the shallow end so I can get my stomach and legs. Once I'm finished scrubbing all the dirt off my body I duck myself underwater again and rub everywhere. I feel so clean now and the scent is intoxicating. I step out and slip my clothes back on and head back to camp feeling refreshed and clean. Happy birthday to me.


	12. 12.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This quote is mine! Enjoy the chapter!

_"If pain didn't accompany death, maybe we wouldn't fear it. If heartache didn't accompany love maybe we wouldn't hesitate. If curiosit_ _y _ _didn't accompany life maybe we wouldn't question it."_   
  
  
  
  
  


**12.**   
  
  
  
  
  


Once I get back to camp I head straight towards the water tent, I step inside and see Octavia filling up her canteen. She turns around at my entry and smiles.

"Don't want Monty's unity juice?" I question her and she laughs.

"Not at all." I laugh with her and she takes a sip of her water. I walk around her to fill up my canteen and drink right away.

"I'm going out of camp right now if you want to come." She says catching me off guard. I know she sneaks out to do god knows what but I didn't think she would actually involve me. She tends to keep what she does out there private so I nod my head right away at the opportunity to see what she has been up to.

"Yeah I'll come." I don't dare ask questions in case she tries to change her mind. Instead I just follow her lead.

We head to the back of the camp where there's a weak spot in the fence. We both slip through it undetected.

"Why are we sneaking out? Why couldn't we just go out the front?" I question as I follow her to wherever the hell we're going.

"Bellamy would never let me leave camp without him. And something tells me he wouldn't let you either if it were up to him." Her voice is light and playful. I roll my eyes at what she's suggesting.

"Just friends." I mutter.

"Mhmm."

We continue walking for quite some time till I'm sure we're almost about 3 miles away from the camp.

"Are you going to tell me where we're going now?" I groan. A twig snaps nearby before she can answer and I quickly pull my gun out and start pointing towards the direction it came from. I don't see anyone but Octavia is trying to push my gun down.

"No stop. It's okay." She says, "You can come out. It's just Taylor." I look at her confused. A noise sounds from behind a tree, my first instinct is raise my gun again but I trust Octavia so I leave it pointed at the ground. From behind the tree a grounder emerges, not just any grounder, it's the one we had held prisoner. Lincoln, I vaguely remember Octavia saying he told her his name. He looks different now, he's wearing less fur and his eyes are gentle when he sees Octavia.

"What's going on?" I question her and look between them both. Octavia walks up to him and hugs him and he hugs her back. Well now I know what Octavia does in her free time.

Him.

"I don't mean to kill the mood here but what am I doing here?" They pull away and Octavia smiles. I slip my gun back into the waist of my pants when I realize he isn't a threat. Bellamy pops into my head and I can just imagine how pissed he'd be if he knew Octavia had been sneaking out to see Lincoln.

"Lincoln has been teaching me how to fight. So I figured maybe he can teach you a few things. Right?" She explains and looks up to Lincoln. He nods at her and looks at me.

"Think of it as a thank you." His voice is very deep and a little scratchy and it would've scared me if he didn't seem nice. I already know what the thank you is for, I tried to stop Bellamy from torturing him and even went as far as jumping in front of him to protect him.

"Yeah well I don't believe in solving everything with violence. But I got a scar to prove what a badass I am." I smile and point to my chest. I see him smile lightly and Octavia rolls her eyes.

"Anyways, I appreciate you wanting to help me but I know how to fight." I explain to him. Once again Jack came in handy for something.

"I'm not just going to teach you how to fight. I'm going to teach you how to fight like a grounder."  
  
  
  
  
  


"Let's see what you got, Linc." I say as we stand facing each other. I had thought we were going to fight in the woods but Lincoln said it's too dangerous for us and for him if either of our people see us. Lincoln goes straight towards me trying to grab me but I dodge him and try to punch him in the face. He grabs my hand tightly and I tried to get out of his grip and punch with the other.

"First rule, always take the hit they would never expect. If I have one of your hands, your instinct will tell you to use the other. Don't think like that, they will expect that. Use your feet, kick." He explains. I try what he's telling me and I kick him and rip one of my hands out of his grip. I manage to free my other hand by kicking him in the shin.

"That was good. Now let's-" He was about to continue till he gets cut off from a male voice.

"I think you lost this." I turn around to see Finn standing in the entrance hallway to the cave holding up a knife. Lincoln goes to grab him but Octavia pushes him away.

"Lincoln, wait! Wait, he's my friend!" She yells at him pushing him back. Lincoln stays still and Octavia turns to Finn.

"So what the hell are you doing here?" She questions him.

"I could ask you the same thing. Actually I could ask both of you the same thing." He says looking at me with a cold stare and I roll my eyes. I've barely spoken more than a few words to Finn since we have gotten down here but we all still act like we know each other.

"I could also ask how long you've known he speaks English, but I won't." He shows Lincoln his horn, "You blew this when your people were hunting us. You saved our lives. I have to believe there's more like you." Finn starts to speak directly towards Lincoln. Lincoln eyes him wearily, I don't blame him either. First he stabs Finn and almost kills him and now he's back.

"I stabbed you." Lincoln says.

"And we tortured you. If the two of us can get along, then maybe there's hope. Learn from history instead of repeating it, right?" I sense Finn starting to negotiate and it's not that bad of an idea. He has always tried to keep peace down here, if there is one person who hates violence, it's Finn.

"How's that gonna happen?" Octavia cuts in.

"For starters, no more killing." Finn suggest. I nod my head at his statement. I don't want anyone else to die, not one of our people nor one of Lincoln's.

"I don't have the power to call a truce." Lincoln crosses his arms.

"Then bring me to someone who does." Finn tells him and Lincoln shakes his head. "Hey, look. The rest of our people are coming down here. The first ship lands in two days."

"It's true." Octavia sighs looking at Lincoln. My heart jumps a little just thinking about getting to see my dad in two days. I've missed him more than anything.

"And because of the attacks, they're sending mostly soldiers, the people that enforce our laws. The Ark is about survival at any cost, and they'll kill people who fall out of line. When those people get down here if they feel threatened, they will start a war, and I don't want that. Neither do you, and I think that's why you blew that horn."

"Once the soldiers get here, it will be too late, and we'll have no power to stop them, but if they see that we're at peace, then maybe we have a chance to stay that way."

Silence follows after Finn's words and I can tell Lincoln is debating it.

"Alright. You bring your leader, I'll bring mine." Lincoln nods. I smile at the agreement. One step closer to peace.

"What, Bellamy? He'll never go for that." Octavia shakes her head and Lincoln shakes his.

"No. Not your brother."

"Clarke?" Finn interjects. He doesn't look too happy at the idea of Clarke being the one to negotiate with the commander but I don't think he has much of a choice. Lincoln nods and looks to me.

"And Taylor." He adds. I swallow hard. Guess I don't either.   
  
  
  
  
  


"I'll find Clarke and let her know." Finn says and goes his own way as we enter back in the camp.

"This is going to go very badly isn't it?" I state more than question. Octavia sighs.

"Let's hope not." She says and walks away. I walk towards the middle of the camp to see that a lot of people are drunk. Some are dancing too close to the fire laughing, idiots. One of them is going to get burned or hurt and I'm going to have to be the one patching them up.

"Here Taylor, have a drink." Some guy that I've only seen a few times shoves a cup in my hands. He has a few people around him smiling and laughing.

"I don't think so. Not right now." I shake my head at him. I can't drink at a time like this. I'm meeting with the leader of the grounders today and I'm already nervous.

"Come on. Just drink a little. Taylor! Taylor!" The girl right next to him starts to shout and her friends join in and before I know it everyone's chiming in. It's just a little and it is my birthday. Who knows maybe it will help my nerves. I shrug and down the liquid, it burns going down my throat but I ignore it. Everyone cheers as I finish and hand the cup back to the guy. I walk away and into the dropship to see Finn changing his bandage. I see the scar and it looks way better than before.

"I talked to Clarke. She's on board. We leave now. Are you ready?" He asks smoothing over his bandage and pulling his shirt down.

No, "Yeah."

"Good. You didn't tell anyone about this did you?" He questions me.

"No. Let's go." I say. Bellamy pops into my head. Should I have told him? He would never agree to this meeting and he would try to call it off but I think it could work. I also trust Lincoln. Let's just hope we don't die.  
  
  
  
  
  


"Have you ever considered this might be a trap?" Clarke asks us as we walk through the woods.

Finn decides to answer, "Yep. But since it's unity day I decided to have hope instead." We were almost to the bridge and the closer we got the more ready I was. The moonshine really helped my confidence. I wasn't drunk or tipsy but I did feel just a little buzzed and it was just enough to make me feel good. I was still nervous but knowing Clarke is here to do it with me makes me feel better. I'm glad we can do this together.

"There it is." The bridge comes into view and we walk up to it. All of a sudden horses start coming from across the bridge letting us know they are here. A rustling sound comes from the trees by us and Octavia and Lincoln come out. I walk up to them.

"Any advice?" I ask Lincoln crossing my arms.

"Don't push her. She asks a question, you answer. If she offers a deal, take it. You won't get any better ones." I huff and nod my head. I turn to see them emerging from the woods with weapons.

"We said no weapons." I say turning to Lincoln. He looks at them confused and turns to me.

"I was told there wouldn't be." He shakes his head. Of course these grounders can't be trusted, maybe Lincoln but not the rest of them. We're so screwed.

"Well here goes nothing." I turn to look at Clarke and she nods as we both walk up to the leader who is on one of the horses.

"Your name is Clarke? And you are Taylor?" The women questions us and we nod. She has black paint on her face in similar to a mask, her hollow cheek bones stand out the most and she is covered in layers of animal fur, it seems to be the grounders trademark.

"I'm Anya." The women speaks.

"I think we got off to a rough start, but we want to find a way to live together in peace." Clarke speaks first and I nod agreeing with what she says.

"I understand. You started a war that you don't know how to end." Anya says. We didn't start anything.

"What? No. We didn't start anything. You attacked us for no reason." Clarke voices my opinion.

"No reason? The missiles you launched burned a village to the ground." Anya speaks with utter disgust, she's angry. I wasn't there when they launched the flares because me and Octavia were being held by Lincoln.

"The flares? No. That was a signal meant for our families. We had no idea-" Clarke gets cut off.

"You're invaders. Your ship landed in our territory." Anya says.

"We didn't know anyone was here. We thought the ground was uninhabited." I say taking a step closer. The two men on either side of her pull their swords out. I put my hands up a little and back up letting them know I'm not a threat.

"You knew we were here when you sent an armed raiding party to capture one of us and torture him. These are all acts of war." Anya sticks her head up high and looks down on us. That's not intimidating at all...

"I see your point. That's why we need to put an end to all of this." I say.

"Lincoln said there are more of you coming down, Warriors." She states more than asks.

"The guard, yes, but also farmers, doctors, engineers. We can help each other but not if we're at war." Clarke cuts in. Anya is quiet for awhile and it bugs me so I decide to interject.

"Look Anya. We understand why you're angry and why you think we started a war. But it was never our intention. If we can live in peace there doesn't have to be anymore deaths. Don't make a choice based on the ones you've lost." I then clear my throat, "Stedaunon don gon we." I say, she looks at me bewildered and I know I caught her off guard. Lincoln had taught me some grounder language. It means 'the dead are gone'. She stared at me curiously till she spoke.

"Can you promise that these new arrivals won't attack us, that they'll respect the terms you and I agree on?" Anya asks.

Clarke goes to speak but Anya cuts her off.

"I'm asking Taylor." Anya looks to me and I look at Clarke. She nods and I look back to Anya. Guess I impressed her.

"I promise I will do everything I can to convince them to honor the terms that we set." I say knowing there's no way I can promise something like that. The council will just see us as delinquents still like they always have, I can't promise they will listen to us.

"Why would I agree to an alliance that your people can break the moment they get here?" Her voice raises and she gets mad again. We're not doing a very good job of negotiating right now.

"If you fire the first shot, those people coming down won't bother negotiating. Our technology- They will wipe you out." Clarke interrupts.

"They wouldn't be the first to try." Anya says her voice sending chills down my spine.

Before anyone can speak again I hear someone shouting from behind us.

"They're going to shoot. Clarke, Taylor, run! Run!" My eyes widen but as I'm about to run, Anya jumps down from her horse and grabs me as Clarke is running away. I punch her in the nose and her grip loosens so I then knee her in the stomach and she lets me go. I turn around to run but there is a grounder in the way. He grabs a hold of me and pushes me back. Anya then grabs me and holds a knife to my throat. Her wrist is right in front of my mouth so I open quickly and bite down as hard as I can on her wrist and she lets go. The grounder in front of me grabs me but two shots to the back make him drop to the floor. I turn to see that Bellamy was the one who fired.

"Run!" He yells and I sprint off quickly as I can ducking arrows flying from behind me. I catch up to him and the rest of our group. We don't stop running till we make it back to camp.


	13. 13.

_"Stars, hide your fires; let not light see my black and deep desires." _   
  
  
  
  


**13.**   
  
  
  
  
  


"You got anything to say?" Clarke asks Finn once we're in the safe confinements of camp.

"Yeah, I told you no guns." Finn is angry and I get where it's coming from.

"I told you we couldn't trust the grounders. I was right." Clarke said crossing her arms.

"Why didn't you tell me what you were up to?" Raven cuts in. Now is not the time, Raven.

"I tried, but you were too busy making bullets for your gun." Finn snaps at her.

"You're lucky she brought that! They came there to kill you, Finn!" Bellamy steps up and a little pang of jealously hits me that he's actually defending Raven. But I know I shouldn't even care. I know he's mad at me too because he's sending me the same glares he's giving Finn. I should have told him.

"Oh, please. You don't know that. And everything would have been fine if Clarke would have just trusted us." I roll my eyes at Bellamy.

"Jasper fired the first shot! You ruined everything!" Octavia yells at him.

"I saved you! You're welcome!" The girl storms off with Jasper following her.

"Well if we weren't at war already we sure as hell are now." Clarke huffs and I roll my eyes again. If she wouldn't of brought back up we could've actually set an alliance, it might of not seemed like it was going anywhere but it would be better than what went down.

"You didn't have to trust the grounders, you just had to trust Taylor, You just had to trust me." Finn sighs and was about to walk away until an explosion sounds through the air. We all look up. It's the exodus ship.

"Your mom's early." Finn says to Clarke.

"So is your dad." Bellamy comments. I look at the ship confused. It's going way too fast.

"Wait. Too fast. No parachute? Something's wrong." Clarke states and I agree. We're proven right when the ship smashes into the ground miles away leaving a mushroom cloud in its wake. My eyes widen and everything goes silent. I can't hear anything and everything just stops. My dad was in that ship. My dad is dead. 

I drop to my knees and my breathing gets heavy. I'm having a panic attack, I use to get them after my mom died. But I hadn't had one in years. I feel hands on me and I faintly hear a voice. I look up to see Bellamy face to face with me. His lips are moving but I can't piece together what he's saying.

My breathing gets heavier and my throat is closing up. Bellamy takes me into his arms and squeezes me and I am being rocked. My breathing slows down a little bit but not all the way. I can hear his voice more clearer now but it's still fuzzy. I'm not just having a panic attack, I'm in shock.

"Taylor, breathe. Just breathe. Listen to my voice. You need to calm down. Breathe with me." Bellamy starts breathing deeply and I feel his chest rising and falling so I follow his pattern and I'm back to breathing regularly in a couple of minutes. Bellamy just holds me there while I come back and I start to cry. I can see Clarke is on the ground as well and some people were standing back watching. Two of their brave leaders on the floor crying. Bet that's a sight to see.

"Princess, it's okay. I'm here." He whispered in my ear and if anything it makes me cry harder. He lifts me up off the ground and I don't have the strength to open my eyes and see where we're going. But when Bellamy sets me down on something I open them. We're in his tent. He has laid me on his bed. He sits down by me and moved my hair out of my face as I continue to softly cry.

"Hey, it's okay." Bellamy says and lays down with me and hugs me to his chest.

His arms wrapped around me makes me feel safe and my crying dies down a little.

"He's dead." I repeat a few times. But no matter how many times I say it I still don't want to believe it.

"Hey, everything is going to be okay. You hear me?" He kisses my head while still holding me. His comfort is both warming and strange. This is the most affection he has ever showed me and with everything that just happened I don't know what to think. I can't think.

"I have no one." I say, realizing that my family is gone. I cry harder. Bellamy lifts up my chin much to my dismay and he grabs my face making me stay still and look at him.

"Don't ever say that. You have me. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. I will always be here for you." He says. My heart hurts from both the pain of loosing my dad and from so much affection Bellamy is showing me. I've never had someone like him in my life. Someone who will hold me and tell me it's okay and everything will be alright. That's all I've ever wanted. And Bellamy is it.

"You should get some rest." Bellamy says, I know he's right but I'm afraid I wont be able to sleep. I nod my head anyway. He slowly gets up and sends me one last glance before walking out of the tent.  
  
  


"I don't think they should be out here." I hear Finn talking to Raven. No doubt about me and Clarke because I see him looking our way. We decided to come to the crash site to look for anything that can lead us to answers. Every bone and burned skeleton I saw I couldn't help but wonder which one was my father. I wouldn't find out. A tear slips down my cheek and I quickly swipe it away with my sleeve of my jacket.

"Stay sharp. Grounder retaliation for what happened on the bridge is coming, just a matter of when." Bellamy says holding his gun and looking around.

"Can you blame them?" Finn cuts in.

"No. I blame you." Bellamy's jaw tightens. I roll my eyes, they are going to start fighting again.

"Maybe if you didn't bring guns." Finn tries to pry but Raven cuts him off.

"If we didn't bring guns, we would've all been killed." Raven defends Bellamy. Why are they so defensive of one another. I don't get it and if i being honest it makes me jealous. I know I shouldn't be but I can't help it.

"You keep saying that but you don't know for sure. Now everyone shut up about it and stay on the lookout like Bellamy said. Why they're coming doesn't matter anymore. It's our job to be ready when they do. We're on our own." I interrupt all of them and they look shocked that I even spoke, I've been quite this whole time. Raven looks annoyed and I feel a sliver of success runs through me at the fact that I got to her a little bit. She looks at me then focuses on something behind me and starts running.

"Clarke! Stop!" She runs over to Clarke and we all follow after her.

"Rocket fuel?" Clarke questions Raven.

Raven shakes her head and picks up a rock.

"Hydrazine, Highly unstable in its non-solid form. If this stuff meets fire, were all pink mist." She dips the rock she has in her hand into the dark pink liquid.

"Fire in the hole!" She yells and she throws the rock far away towards a small fire nearby and it explodes.

"We need to clear the area." She says and everyone nods.

"We move in formation, no straggling, weapons hot. We got to get back before dark." Bellamy speaks up and we all follow his lead.

We get back to camp when the night has already come. We walk in and people seem to be antsy.

"Bellamy. Murphy is back. He's in the dropship." Miller says walking up to us. My eyes widen and I take off into the dropship.

"Where is he?" I ask and everyone moves to the side and there he is sitting down bloodied and covered in dirt.

"Everyone but Connor and Derek out." Bellamy says from behind me and the dropship clears out.

"He claims he was with the grounders. We caught him trying to sneak back into camp." Derek says.

"I wasn't sneaking. I was running from the grounders." Murphy mumbles.

"Anyone see grounders?" Bellamy asks and they shake their heads.

"Well in that case." He lifts his gun to Murphy but Finn steps in front of it.

"Hey, what the hell is wrong with you." He shouts at Bellamy.

"We were clear what would happen if he comes back." Bellamy says and I cut in.

"Yes we were. Killing him is too easy. He will have to deal with me." I say exactly what I had said to Murphy awhile ago. I haven't forgotten that day, it plays on a loop in my nightmares.

"No stop. The both of you. If he was with the grounders then he knows things that can help us." Finn says.

"Help us? We hanged him. We banished him and now we're going to kill him" Bellamy adds.

"Get the hell out of my way." I say to Finn.

"No." He crosses his arms and stands ground. Clarke goes over to Murphy and speaks.

"Finn is right."

"Like hell he is." Bellamy yells.

"Clarke, think about Charlotte." Bellamy tries to guilt her.

"I am thinking about her. But what happened to Charlotte was as much as our fault as his." Clarke explained and I shake my head.

"He's not lying. His fingernails were torn off. They tortured him." Clarke explains to us lifting his nails up to inspect them.

"You and the grounders should compare notes." Finn says to Bellamy and Bellamy does not look amused.

"The grounders know we're at war. What did you tell them about us?" I ask Murphy with anger in my voice. If it were up to me he wouldn't be able to talk right now.

"Everything." He mutters. I go to punch him but Clarke grabs my hand and pulls me and Bellamy to the side.

"Once he's better we find out what he knows and then he's out of here. Okay?" Clarke says.

"What if he refuses to leave? What do we do with him then?" Bellamy asks.

Clarke looks over to Murphy then us, "Then we kill him."

"No. Then you leave him to me." I say and walk up to him. I grab his bloody chin and tilt his face up to look at me. His eyes don't hold the same confidence and cockiness like they use to. Instead they hold fear, exhaustion, and maybe even guilt.

"If you try anything, everything the grounders did I will do ten times worse." I whisper so that only he can hear and I shove him away and get up. I wipe the blood on my pants and walk out the dropship. I go towards Bellamy's tent to get my jacket I left in there. I walk in and look around for it until I find it jumbled with the blankets. I slip it on and turn around and walk out of the tent. People start to yell and call for Clarke and some for me and I look around confused. People are spitting up blood or bleeding from their nose or eyes. Clarke comes up to me with bleeding eyes but she keeps her distance.

"Murphy." She says and we both walk into the dropship and walk over towards him.

"Murphy, tell me exactly how you escaped." I demand and he coughs up some blood before speaking.

"I just woke up and they forgot to lock my cage so I ran." He says. Me and Clarke both look at each other knowing what's happening.

"Taylor, your nose." She says. I touch under my nose and bring my fingers up to see blood on them. Bellamy barges in.

"Did he hurt you guys?" He says eyes wide.

"What is this?" He questions again. He tries to step forward but I stop him.

"No. Stay back. It's biological warfare." I answer him.

"You were waiting for retaliation from the bridge. Well this is it." Clarke says. All of a sudden her eyes widen and she leans over and starts coughing up blood.

"Shit." I scoot closer to her and move her hair out of her way.

"What do we do?" Bellamy asks.

"Quarantine. Round up everyone who had contact with Murphy. Bring them here." I say.

"And everyone who had contact with them?"

"Well, we have to start somewhere." I say and my throat closes and I start coughing up blood. Bellamy tries to step forward to me.

"Stay back!" I yell at him and he sighs.

"Connor, who was with you when you carried him in?" Bellamy asks the sick boy.

"The first one was Octavia." He says. A guy I had yet to know the name of started coughing really loudly in the corner and then he just stopped and slumped over, I went over to check his pulse by putting my fingers on his neck.

"He's dead." I cough into my shoulder. 

"Go find her. We got everything covered here." I tell him and he nods and runs out.

Finn had told people to come to the drop ship if they were sick or just to be checked out. Me and Clarke were checking for symptoms and helping everyone. Bellamy walks in with Octavia a little while later and I check her.

"She's all good. No visible signs of symptoms." I say shutting off the flashlight.

"We should keep her here on the third floor with people who aren't showing yet just in case." I say.

"No way, she'll get sick just being in here." Bellamy shakes his head at me.

"She'll be fine. Think of it this way, she can't sneak out again." Clarke buts in.

"Screw you." Octavia says to Clarke and I almost laugh. Bellamy sighs but nods his head and walks out.

"Octavia. I need you to sneak out again." I say pulling her to the side away from Clarke.  
  
  
  


"Hey, can you help her over there?" I asked a kid sitting next to me. I think his name was Kyle. He nodded and helped the sick girl. Lots of us we in quarantine so we were helping each other.

"Hey, drink some more water." I grabbed a cup of water from the table and helped another girl who was coughing drink water.

"I'll be right back." I tell the girl and get up from my crouching position. I got a little dizzy standing up but I shake it off. I walk over to the dropship flaps and go outside to see Bellamy talking to some people. When he sees me he walks up a little but not too close.

"You got enough food in there, water?" He asks me.

"Yeah." He grimaces at my voice.

"Some medicine might be nice." I joke with him, trying to ease his worries. His lips tug up into a smile and he looks down and back up.

"I'll see what I can do." He nods, "Octavia, are you okay?" He asks tilting his head to look behind me. Oh no. He tries to walk a little closer but I speak up.

"Bellamy, wait." I sigh. He's going to kill me.

"She's not here. I sent her to see Lincoln..." As I told him his jaw tightens and he looks angry.

"Look if there's a cure, he has it. I didn't tell you because I knew you wouldn't let her go." He shakes his head at me and looks away.

"If anything happens to her..." He starts but I cut him off.

"Bellamy, she's safe with him." I reassure him but he doesn't look convinced.

People start shouting to his left. He turns to see a guy with blood pouring down his eyes.

"Dropship now." He tells the guy and the guy makes his way over to me and gets inside.

A commotion breaks out to the right of me and a girl just spit up blood on someone's face and another guy is bleeding from his nose. Many people with guns raised them to the sick and all hell breaks loose. No one was listening to Bellamy or Finn. I remembered I had a gun in my waistband so I pulled it out and fired two shots in the air. Everyone stopped and looked to me quietly.

"This is exactly what the grounders want. Don't you see that? They don't have to kill us if we kill each other first. They won't have to kill us if we all catch the virus." I explain with my scratchy voice.

"Get back in the damn dropship." A guy yells pointing his gun at me. Bellamy goes up behind him and jabs his gun into his head knocking him out.

"Not to state the obvious but your quarantine is not working." Bellamy says and I huff. All of a sudden I start to feel a little dizzy again but this time it takes over and I sway a little.

"Bellamy, don't touch her!" I hear Raven yell but before I fall and hit the ground Bellamy catches me. I don't have time to be mad at Raven for trying to tell Bellamy not to touch me. I don't have the energy to either.

"I'm fine. Let me go." I tell him and he shakes his head.

"No, you're not."

"Octavia will come back with a cure." I reassure him.

"There is no cure, but the grounders don't use the sickness to kill." I see Octavia to the side of me come through the crowd.

"Really? Tell that to them." Bellamy nods his head to the guys who died from it.

"I warned you about seeing that grounder again." Bellamy adds.

"Yeah? Well I have a warning for you too. The grounders are coming. And they're attacking at first light." She says and I tell Bellamy to put me down but he doesn't let up.

"Let's get you in the dropship." Bellamy says to me ignoring Octavias information and he turns and walks in. He sets me down on one of the hammocks inside and goes to grab a can of water on the table to the side of me.

"Is she okay?" Murphy walks up to me.

"Get away from her." Bellamy says right by my side again and holding a cup of water.

"I'm just trying to help..." Murphy explains and I don't have the energy to fight him either.

"Don't. Stay away from her." Bellamy fires back and Murphy shakes his head and walks away. Bellamy helps me drink the water and it feels nice going down my throat.

"Bellamy, you need to get out of here, you'll get sick." I tell him. He just shakes his head and smiles.

"You're always worried about other people, why don't you worry about yourself for a chance, princess?" He moves some strands of hair out of my face.

"It's my job." I cough out.

"Not right now. Octavia watch her. I need to talk to Raven." Bellamy calls out to Octavia. I mentally roll my eyes at her name. Octavia comes into sight with a wet rag in her hand and nods to Bellamy. Bellamy gives me one last glance and he leaves.

"He really cares for you, you know." Octavia says and wipes the rag across my head. The cold water on my head calms me.

"He's being a good friend." I tell her and she shakes her head laughing.

"Bellamy doesn't have friends." She says which makes me laugh. My laugh turns into a little cough and I spit some blood out.

"Well he does now." I tell her.

"We will see about that. Now get some rest." She says and my eyes start to shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How fucking cute was Bellamy in this, he did not care about getting sick he just wanted to be there for Taylor. I love them. And I love slow burns.


	14. 14.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3 more chapters left....

_"Trust your heart if the seas catch fire, live by love though the stars walk backward."_  
  
  
  
  


**14.**  
  
  
  
  


"Murphy! Taylor said when that happens to roll him on his side!" I hear Octavia shout. My eyes open and I slowly sit up. I feel a lot better then before and I can actually stand without feeling dizzy.

"About time, sleepy head." Octavia smiles at me and I return it.

"How long was I out?" I ask her. she seems fine still and I'm glad for it. Bellamy would beat himself up if she was sick.

"Not long. Maybe about 15 minutes." She tells me and I nod.

A loud coughing disrupts our conversation and I look to see two guys carrying in Bellamy. My eyes widen and I run over to them. Me and Octavia set Bellamy down and roll him on his stomach. He immediately throws up blood and I cringe at how sick he looks.

"Bell, hey, big brother." Octavia says moving the hair out his eyes trying to calm him down. He looks a little more relaxed at her touch and it warms my heart.

"I'm scared." He admits. I've never seen Bellamy this vulnerable before. It's a different side of him. Even the night of the day trip to the bunker he wasn't as vulnerable as he is right now.

"I won't let anything happen to you I promise." She tells him and I decide to get up to get him some water and to let them have their moment. I grab a cup off one of the tables and go back over to Bellamy. As I crouch down, Octavia stands up and nods.

"Here drink some water." I lean the cup to his lips and he drinks, then lays back down. I place the cup to the side and I look at him.

"How do I look?" He whispers, a light smile on his face and eyes squinted.

"Handsome." I tease.

He grins.

"Didn't peg you for a liar, princess." He says through his cough. I cringe at the horrible sound, I wish he didn't touch me, now he's sick for doing so. But that's Bellamy, always putting others before himself. That's one of the reasons I'm crazy about him. He's changed.

"Well, I'm not lying." I say laughing lightly. He does looks handsome. His hair is in a curly mess; something I have always loved, his freckles are still so prominent across his nose, and despite the dried blood on his lips I still want to kiss him. He looks handsome. How can someone still look beautiful even when they are sick? I shake the thoughts away. We're just friends.

"Get some rest, Bellamy." I say and he nods his head and closes his eyes but not before grabbing my hand whispering _stay_. I stay there holding his hand and watch him fall asleep. Once I know he's fast asleep I slip his hand from mine and get up. As much as I would love to stay for Bellamy, I still have to help the other sick people.

"Bellamy sent Jasper to set up a bomb at the bridge to buy us more time." Octavia says letting me know what's going on since I have to stay inside the dropship.

"Okay good. Who made the bomb?" I ask her while drying my hands on a cloth from blood and gunk that has gathered.

"Raven." She says and I internally groan at her name. I still don't like her and she's given me all the reason not to. But I have to say she is very smart and has helped a lot.

"Taylor, um.. I cut myself." A boy walks up to me and shows me his arm. I sigh and look at the cut. It's deep enough for stitches so I get the supplies out. He sits on the table while I start to stitch him up. Octavia tells me Murphy will take over for her so she can get some sleep and I nod and focus on the stitching.

"Next time be more careful." I tell him as I finish the stitching. He managed to cut his arm on a piece of scrap metal.

"Yeah yeah." He says and gets off the table and walks out of the dropship.

"When I get better...if you're still here." I hear a familiar voice say. I turn to see Bellamy sitting up with Murphy trying to hand him a cup of water and cloth. I walk up to them.

"I got him, Murphy." I tell him and grab the cloth and cup from him and I sit down by Bellamy.

"Here." I hand him the cup and he takes it from me and chugs down the whole thing.

"You feeling better?" Bellamy asks me. I can't help but laugh through my nose. Same old Bellamy making sure everyone else is okay even when he's not.

"Yeah, are you?" I question him and he nods.

"You seen Octavia?"

"She was up all night helping people. Murphy gave her a break." I explain to him and he looks at me strangely.

"Don't tell me you trust him now."

"Trust? No. But he has been helping so I've decided to not kill him yet." I'm partly joking about killing him but part of me still wants to. My chest restricts thinking about Charlotte, thinking about that night. it seems like forever ago, everything's just happened so fast I never really got to grieve her properly.

He laughs and looks at me. I see he has blood around his mouth so I grab the cloth and wipe away as much as I can from his face.

"I still look handsome?" He asks me and I smile. I didn't think he would remember me saying that since he was half asleep.

"Nah, it was better when you were unconscious." I joke around. I don't want him to take my compliment out of proportion because I'm afraid he won't feel the same way back when he finds out that I have feelings for him.

"You guys good?" Clarke says walking into the dropship and we nod. She's been running things outside of the dropship while me and Octavia help out in here.

A loud explosion sounds and shakes the dropship before I can speak. We all walk out and look up to see a mushroom cloud.

"They did it." Bellamy says. I smile and look to them. Clarke and Bellamy both share the same smile.

"I am become death, destroyer of both worlds." Clarke starts to say, "it's Oppenheimer, the man who built the first..." Bellamy cuts her off,

"I know who Oppenheimer is."  
  
  
  


After the long day I decided to visit the graves. We lost four more people today from the virus. I go outside of the camp and walk over to them. The four of them were already holding the bodies beneath the fresh dirt.

"You're outside of the wall without a gun." Bellamy says, interrupting the silence. I laugh and lift up my shirt a little to show him the gun in my pants.

"I appreciate the concern though." I say and he nods and walks closer as we both look at the graves.

"We need to talk about Murphy. He was right about the bridge." I sigh. I hating giving Murphy the benefit of the doubt. I appreciate the intel and the help but there's no way I want him to stay. Every time I look at him I'm reminded of Charlotte.

"We'll see." He huffs.

"Octavia says the mountain men are pissed, whatever that means." I let him know.

"I'd say it means we need as many soldiers as we can get."

"So, what, we have pardon power now?" I ask him curiously.

"It's hard running things." Bellamy says and I laugh and nod.

"But it's our job. We all have jobs to do." I sigh and continue, "Thanks for catching me earlier. I'm sorry you got sick." I step closer to him to actually look in his eyes. 

"It's not your fault, I was bound to get sick. But I'll always catch you, princess." My heart jumps at his words, I feel as if they hold a double meaning but I try not to read too much into it. 

I decide that a hug wouldn't be bad, after today I need one, and something tells me he does too. I step forward wrapping my arms around his neck embracing him in a hug. He immediately wraps his arms around my waist and hugs back. I sigh into the hug and keep my head against his chest. My height puts me in the perfect place that I can faintly hear his heartbeat. He's warm and I don't want to let go but I have too. I pull away from the hug and keep my arms around his shoulders and he unwraps his hands from my back and slides them to my waist. Everywhere he's touching heats up making my heart beat faster.

"Goodnight, Bellamy." I whisper and pull away from him softly.

"Goodnight, Princess." I bite my lip at his gentle tone.  
  
  


"You're up pretty early." Monty greets me as I walk into the dropship. He's messing around with the radio and one of the wristbands. We lost connection with the ark a few days ago and Monty has been trying to figure out a way to communicate again.

"Yeah well, I figured might as well get an early start on the day." I shrug and he nods his head.

"Do you need help with anything?" I ask him and he looks at me.

"Well that depends, if it's with all of this stuff, no. But I would like some water." He smiles wearily and I roll my eyes.

"You're lucky I love you." I grab his cup and turn around leaving the dropship and head straight towards the water tent. I go in and there's someone getting water. It's Raven. I ignore her and walk up to the the tube and twist the nob so the water comes pouring into the cup.

Raven speaks taking me by surprise, "Do you have a problem with me? Because if you do, speak up, Queen." I scoff at her attitude and I stop what I'm doing and face her.

"Hmm let me think, you electrocuted me and then you didn't even apologize." I say bewildered at her. She laughs.

"You really expect me to believe that you're mad at me because I haven't apologized? Please. I know the real reason you don't like me." She smirks like she knows everything. I roll my eyes at her. Why would she ask me then?

"Amuse me."

"I see the way you look at Bellamy, hell he looks at you the same way. You like him. Queen's got a crush on the king. " My jaw tightens at her words but before I can say anything she continues.

"You don't like me because me and Bellamy are friends. I see you practically murdering me In your head whenever I'm talking to him. But he doesn't know about your little crush, does he?" She sends me a wicked smirk.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I say as nonchalantly as I could. I couldn't let her see that she was getting under my skin. Or that she figured out I like Bellamy, the only people who knew were Monty and Jasper, and maybe Octavia.

"Bullshit. You and I both know you've got the hots for Bellamy."

I decide to not play into her little game. She's just trying to screw around with me and I honestly can not be bothered to continue this.

"Why don't you go find Finn... Oh wait, he's probably with Clarke." I smile at her knowing I got to her.

"Go screw yourself." She yells and walks out.

I roll my eyes as she exits, she was asking for it.

I fill up Monty's cup with water and head back to the dropship. Once inside I set the cup of water down by Monty and he thanks me.

Before I can ask him if there is anything else he needs there's a loud commotion going outside.

"What now." I huff and walk out. Everyone seems to be heading towards the meat station so I follow. When I arrive the meat station is in flames. Oh my god. I look around to make sure everyone is safe.

Bellamy and Octavia are talking, I know she was working here but she seems to be fine.

Clarke walks up next to me and sees the remains of the meat.

"This is all your fault! We told you it was too much wood!" Murphy yells walking up to a guy know as Del. Murphy shoved him and gets in one good punch. Murphy is in the middle of everything these days. Me and Bellamy never really talked about what we were going to do with him. I still want him gone. He causes nothing but trouble.

Murphy continues to fight Del but Del isn't having it, "Get the hell away from me!"

"Hey! Hey!" Bellamy hassles to shove them away from each other but he finally does, "Hey, stop! Save it for the grounders." He drops his hands once he sees they aren't going to try anything again.

"Now what the hell are we going to do? That was all the food." Octavia asks. The flames are making me sweat and I'm not even standing too close to them.

Bellamy looks to me and Clarke. I sigh. What are we going to do?  
  
  
  


"Any idea what happened?" Clarke questions Bellamy. We finally got the fire to go down and everything is charred.

Bellamy sighs, "Murphy says that Del kept feeding the fire, mostly because Octavia told him it was a bad idea."

I interject after he explained, "And we believe Murphy?" I don't trust Murphy. Sure he helped out everyone when they were sick but it doesn't make him a good person.

"I do." Bellamy tells us and I sigh. If Bellamy believes him then I guess I do too. Bellamy detects bullshit when he hears it.

I look around at the mess, "Well is there anything left here?" Bellamy shakes his head.

"We have some wild onions and nuts in the dropship. It's only enough to last us maybe one or two weeks." Clarke tells us. Well this means we have to go out and hunt.

This might be a really bad idea, "Then we have to hunt. Anyone we can spare goes out." Clarke nods but Bellamy shakes his head.

"With the whole grounder army out there?" Bellamy gives me a pointed look.

"We can't defend ourselves if we're starving." Clarke defends my idea and Bellamy looks like he's contemplating it and then he looks at me and nods.  
  
  


"Each group takes someone with a gun, and they're for killing Grounders, not food. We don't have the ammo. Use the spears for hunting. Get what you can. Be back by nightfall. No one stays out after dark." Bellamy explains to everyone in the dropship. We're all running around getting our weapons and preparing.

"Hey, Taylor, you going out?" Monty comes up to me and asks.

"I was going to but I think it's better for me to stay back, someone's gotta watch the camp." I explain to him. I shove a few berries in my mouth and help some kids load their guns. Everyone seems to be clearing out of the dropship already so it's not as cramped anymore.

He nudged me with his elbow, "Look at you, so responsible. But I never got to ask you how the soap worked out?"

"It was amazing, thank you so much, Monty." I pull him into a quick hug.

"Yeah well I'm awesome so." He shrugs and I laugh.

"Oh god, You're almost as cocky as Bellamy." I joke.

"Bellamy what?" I turn around to see Bellamy standing before me smirking.

"Oh nothing-" I try to say until Monty cuts me off.

"She said you were cocky." Monty takes some berries out of my hand, pops them into his mouth and walks away. I roll my eyes, he did that on purpose.

"Really?" Bellamy crosses his arms and even through his jacket his biceps bulge. Don't get distracted, Taylor.

I bit my lip, "Maybe. It's okay though. It works for you." I pat his shoulder and try to walk past him but he grabs my wrist.

"No goodbye?" He asks me.

"It's not goodbye if you're coming back, so see you later." I smile up at him and he nods.

"Well, I'll see you later." He turns away and walks out the dropship leaving me with butterflies in my stomach. What are you doing to me, Bellamy Blake? 


	15. 15.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quote is mine! Enjoy!

_"If you're fire, engulf me in flames. For I love the pain that your love brings."_   
  
  
  
  
  


**15.**   
  
  
  
  
  


"Jasper blamed it on us!" Monty says. Making me break out into a fit of laughter.

"Yes and I told you guys I was sorry." Jasper rolls his eyes at us.

The hunters still weren't back yet so me, Monty, and Jasper were hanging around in the dropship reminiscing of our days back on the ark. Raven was on the other side trying to make walkie talkies. She would look over and send me a glare every once in awhile but I ignored it. As we were laughing we heard noise coming from outside.

"Guess the hunters are back." I tell the guys and they nod. Raven walks out when she hears them. Probably to go find Finn. Sometimes I do feel bad for her, she just wanted to come down here for Finn and she finds out he's sleeping with another girl.

"I'm going to go check on everyone out there." I tell the guys and they nod. I walk out the dropship to see everyone back. Some are by the fire and some are getting water. I see some guys carry in a boar and I thank the heavens that we got something to eat. I don't see Clarke anywhere or Bellamy. I walk around but I can't seem to find them anywhere. I ask a girl who walks by me, "Have you seen Bellamy or Clarke? "

"Yeah, I think he went into his tent and Clarke is still out there with Finn." I nod at her. I hope they're okay, I know they can hold their own but I still worry.

I walk over to Bellamys tent. I don't bother checking to see if he's in there. I just walk in, "Hey, Bellamy, I-" My mouth shuts as soon as I see the scene before me. Raven has got her pants off and is standing right in front of Bellamy. My heart feels like it just shattered into a million pieces and I can feel tears stinging my eyes but I don't let them fall.

"Taylor-" Bellamy tries but I clear my throat.

"You're busy, I'll come back." I say and quickly exit the tent. I hear Bellamy call my name a few times but I don't dare turn back. Why is he even trying to get my attention? I should've known he hadn't changed, he's the same Bellamy. I walk a little faster trying to get to my tent fast, I end up passing Octavia.

"Taylor!" I hear her yell but I don't stop. I don't want anyone to see me cry. I shouldn't even be crying, It's stupid of me to think that Bellamy would actual reciprocate the feelings I had for him.

"Taylor." She grabs my wrist and I turn around, a tear has already fallen down my cheek.

"Hey, are you okay?" She questions me and I nod.

"Yeah, yeah." I wipe away my tears and clear my throat, "I'm fine." I nod.

"No you're not. What happened?" She grabs my arm trying to get me to tell her what's wrong.

"I'd rather not talk about it. Are we going to go look for Clarke and Finn?"

"Yeah, me, Bellamy, Raven, and Monty are going to go. We got walkie talkies now." She explains to me. Oh good, now Raven and Bellamy together.

"I'm going." I say.

"I don't think that's the best idea." Octavia says.

"Why not?"

"Because Clarke and Finn not being back yet has everyone shaken up. They think the grounders may have taken them. Someone needs to watch camp." Why am I always the one who has to stay back? In a way I guess it's a good thing, I don't have to see Bellamy or Raven right now but knowing they are going to be out there together makes my chest tighten.

"Okay, I'm going to say bye to Monty." I pull her in for a quick hug and tell her to be safe and then I get back to the dropship. Monty is there messing with a walkie talkie.

"Hear you're going out." I say walking up to him.

"Yeah, I decided I should help." He shrugs.

"You help us everyday, Monty. Just promise me you'll stay safe out there?" I hold up my pinky and he rolls his eyes, "I promise." He lifts his up and we lock them.

"Stay safe." I hug him.

"Monty, are you ready?" Bellamy walks in the dropship. He takes a glance at me and then focuses on Monty.

"Yeah." Monty gives me one last look before walking out. Bellamys eyes meet mine and I look away clearing my throat.

"Taylor, I-"

"Keep an eye on Monty for me, him and Jasper are all I got down here." These were the same words I said to Clarke the very first day we landed on this damned planet. So much has happened since and for awhile I thought I had Bellamy too, but it appears I only have him as a friend. I didn't want to talk to him about what happened. As much as I was hurt I didn't want to make it seem like a big deal because me and Bellamy are just friends.

"That's not true." He tells me and walks closer.

I give him a curious glance, "What?"

"You've got me." His words surprise me, surely he's just saying that to make me feel better, right? 

"Thanks." I nod. I don't feel like speaking to him. And he shouldn't be wasting his time talking to me right now when Finn and Clarke are still out there.

Bellamy shakes his head, "No, you don't understand. Taylor-"

"Bell, we're leaving." Octavia walks in. I can tell just by the look on her face that she knows she interrupted us. Well Bellamy, not me.

"Okay, I'll be there in a second." Bellamy tells her.

I shake my head, "No, go. You have to find Finn and Clarke." He looks almost sad that I'm trying to push him to leave. I just don't want to talk about it anymore with him. He nods his head despite the fact that he wanted to talk to me and turns around and walks out with Octavia.   
  
  


"Hey, have you seen Monty?" Miller comes up to me.

"He left to go find Clarke like 20 minutes ago. Why?" I ask him as I chuck my knife at the tree in front of me. It sticks in between the bark nicely and I go to retrieve it.

"I just wanted to ask him about the radio, if he managed to get in contact with the ark again." Miller explains as I throw the knife again.

"No, Raven disconnected everything to make walkie talkies. There's no more radio." I explain to him. I turn to look at him and his expression changed completely, he looks upset. He told me his dad was still up there, I'm guessing that's what it's about. I feel a pang in my heart at the thought of my dad, he's not coming down. He's gone. I shake the thought away.

"Hey, they will be down soon. Don't worry." I give him a reassuring smile and he returns it.

"Thanks, I guess I'll get back to work." I nod and he walks off. I grab my knife from the tree again and stand back. As I was about to throw it again I heard the gate open. They're back. I slip my knife into my belt and walk towards the entrance. Bellamy, Raven and Octavia seem to be carrying a boy. He's hurt. He has an arrow in his chest. My eyes widen and I rush up to them.

"Put him in the dropship, now." I rush them to get inside and they set him on the table. I ask Octavia to find me some more moonshine and cloths. Bellamy and Raven stay inside with me watching me rip open the boys shirt so I can see his wound. It happened to go all the way through and from where it's placed it doesn't look like like there will be too much damage once I pull it out. Octavia comes back in with the moonshine and cloths and I pour some around his wound. He groans in pain. I have to take the arrow out but I need something to cut the arrow so I don't damage anything.

"Hey, hey, Myles. Breath okay?" I try talking to him trying to calm him down. I need to snap the arrow to pull it out.

I look up to seem them watching me and I sigh, "Bellamy, come hold the arrow." He walks up to me and I have him hold the arrow.

"I'm going to break it. Make sure to hold it steady." He nods his head and I take a deep breathe in. I grab the end of the arrow and snap it. Myles groans in pain.

"Okay, you can let go." I tell Bellamy and he lets go but stays close.

"Help me get him on his side." Bellamy helps me slowly get him on his side without moving the arrow too much.

"Okay, Myles, I'm not going to lie. This is going to hurt. I have to pull it out." His eyes widen after I speak.

"Hey, I'll be quick okay?" I reassure him and he nods.

"Octavia, cloth." She hands me the cloth and I offer it to Myles to take in between his teeth. He accepts and I put it in his mouth.

"Okay, Bellamy, hold him. On the count of three Myles...1...2." I yank the arrow out as quickly as I can and he shouts in agony and spits out the cloth.

"You said 3!" He yells groaning afterwards.

"It's better when you least expect it."

After pulling the arrow out I categorized the wound much to his dismay and I was done.

"Is it over?" Myles asked me. I nod to him and he sits up slowly making sure not to strain his stomach too much.

"You can walk properly in a day or two. Just take it easy." I explain to him and he sighs.

"Come on, I'll take you back to your tent." Raven told him and she put his arm around her shoulder but before she leaves she turns to Bellamy and Octavia, "The land mines are ready to go, we just need people to start putting them in the ground." Then she walks out with Myles.

"Anymore surprises?" I joke and Bellamy and Octavia share a look.

"I got this." Bellamy tells Octavia and she nods and walks past me and out the dropship. Got what?

"What? What's wrong?" I question him.

"Taylor...when we went to find Finn and Clarke we split up to cover more ground. Monty went alone." Bellamy starts to tell me. Where's he going with this?

I shake my head not understanding what he was trying to say,

"Where is he?"

"We don't know. He wasn't responding to his walkie talkie and we had to bring Myles back right away." My heart dropped, It's been through a lot today and this makes everything worse.

I pace in front of him, "Okay, well we have to go out there and look for him. We can't leave him out there alone." Bellamy tries to grab my arm but I rip it out of his grasp. Tears start rolling down my face.

"We can't. It's too dangerous." I stop pacing and look at him bewildered.

"No, we have to! Why would you let him go alone? He's barely been out there!" I yell. Bellamy grabs my arm again and I try to get out of his hold but he doesn't let up.

"Taylor, Taylor." He struggles to stop me from getting out of his grip, "We will find them. We will go tomorrow. First light." I break down into tears and he pulls me into a hug. I'm too tried to fight back so I let him hold me.

"It'll be alright, okay?" I nod my head and pull away from him, wiping my tears away.

"I'm fine." I clear my throat and straighten up. I can't believe he's seeing me like this again.

"Taylor, no you're not." He shakes his head and tries to grab me again.

"No, stop. I'm fine. Just go, go help Raven with her mines." I cross my arms and wait till he leaves. He sighs and starts to walk towards the dropship exit.

"You know nothing happened." Bellamy says and I stand there clueless. I know he gets the memo when he starts to speak again.

"Me and Raven. I said no." My heart stops. Before he can walk out I ask him, "Why?"

He turns and looks at me for a second and looks down at the ground. I wait for his reply for a few seconds and he looks back up and sighs.

"Because that's not who I am anymore."

I cross my arms curiously and sniffle, "And who are you now?"

"I'm someone who wants to be better for this camp, better for Octavia, I'm someone who wants to be better for you." After he finishes his sentence he moves aside the tarp and walks out. Bellamy wants to be better...for me?  
  
  
  
  
  


"Miller, do you want to blow our God damn faces off? Because that's what's going to happen if you keep hitting the mine with the shovel!" I yell at Miller. I was helping him set up a mine along with everyone else who was setting up some as well. Miller was being careless and accidentally hitting the mine every time he tried to dig around it.

"Sorry, sorry." He puts his hands up in defense and I roll my eyes as I pack the dirt over the mine.

"Sorry isn't going to mean a thing when we're blown to bits." I pat his shoulder and walk back into camp. As I get in a shot goes off and I look around everywhere to see where it came from.

"Hey!" I hear from behind me. I turn around to see Bellamy walking up to some kid who was patrolling with his gun.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" Bellamy shouts to the kid and gets closer to him. I walk up closer to see the scene unfold.

"I'm sorry, man. I fell asleep. I've been on watch all day." The kid explained. I feel bad for him, we weren't ready for any of this.

Bellamy grabs the boys collar and shoves him against the tree, "We've all been on watch all day! That bullet was one less dead grounder!" He yells at him. The poor kid looked terrified. I walk up to Bellamy and place my hand on his shoulder.

"Bellamy, stop this." He doesn't let go of his collar.

"Bell, you're scaring people." Octavia tries and he shoves the kid away.

"They should be scared!" Bellamy turns to look at everyone, "The bomb on the bridge bought us some time to prepare, but that time is up! The grounders are out there right now, waiting for us to leave and picking us off one by one when we do! Clarke, Finn, and Monty are gone, probably dead! If you want to be next, I can't stop you but no guns are leaving this camp! This camp is the only thing keeping us alive! Get back to work!" 

What's wrong with him? He thinks Montys dead. Just awhile ago he told me we would go looking for them first light and now he's bossing everyone around and being a jerk. Here we go again with the mind games. I roll my eyes and ask everyone if they need help with the mines. After almost all of them are put into place we all head back inside camp.

"Hey, you want to help me make more gunpowder?" Jasper comes up to me after everything has settled.

"Sure." We head back to the dropship and once we enter we see Bellamy. I notice Jasper stiffen up.

"Don't you think I want to go after them?" Bellamy asks us.

"If it was you out there do you think Clarke, or Finn, or Monty would hide behind these walls?" Jasper speaks up.

"No, they'd go after me. Then they'd be dead too. I am doing what I think is right for the group." I know I'm a leader too but there's no way people would listen to me over Bellamy. So even if I really wanted to tell everyone we should go search for them they would all turn to Bellamy.

"It's funny, you didn't think that way when Octavia went missing." Jasper says heading to the ladder.

Bellamy sighs, "Where are you going?" He looks at Jasper.

Jasper puts his hand in a salute, "More gunpowder for your minefield sir." And then he climbs up to the second floor. Bellamy looks to me when he's gone and he's about to speak until I cut him off, "Save it." I walk past him and up the ladder. Jasper is already getting busy so I join him. We make lots more gunpowder with what we've got and I'm very proud of myself for learning so quickly from Jasper.

"Hey, I'm going to get some water, you want some?" Jasper says standing up from sitting and I shake my head.

"No, I'm fine." He nods and walks down the ladder. I continue to make the gunpowder until I hear a weird noise, I realize it's the dropship doors closing. Who would be closing the doors? I take a peek down and my eyes widen. Murphy's got a gun pointed at Jasper. I hear banging on the dropship and yelling and I can make it out to be Bellamys voice.

"You try to be a hero, Jasper dies." Murphy yells back. I look around for anything I can use to defend myself but I left my knife on the first floor when I was cauterizing Myles' wound. I try to get up as quietly as I can to look around to see if I can find something.

But luck is not on my side when I trip on a can and I stumble making a terribly loud noise.  
  



	16. 16.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter after this!! This is the chapter you've all been waiting for...

_"If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger."_   
  
  
  
  


**16.**   
  
  
  
  
  


"Who's up there?" Murphy shouts. Damn it.

"Come down now or I'll shoot Jasper."

"Okay, okay. I'm coming." I say as I climb down the ladder. Once I get down I put my hands up in defense he quickly grabs me while keeping the gun pointed at Jasper. I struggle to get out of his grip till he knocks me to the floor with the butt of his gun. I stumble to the floor but he grabs me and sits me down on a chair. I feel dizzy and I don't have the power to fight back. He grabs my hands behind my back and ties a seatbelt around them together tightly. I wince at the pain and he does the same to my legs. My mind seems to clear and I realize what he's doing.

"Murphy! Stop!" I struggle to get loose, I twist and turn but nothing works. Before I know what's happening he places a piece of cloth in my mouth and back around my head to gag me. I try to talk but my words come out into mumbles.

"Murphy, I know you can hear me." I hear Bellamys voice come through the walkie talkie, "Our ammo and food is in the middle level. You know that. You're leaving us vulnerable to an attack. I can't let that happen."

Murphy presses the button, "Yeah, well, in case you haven't noticed, you're not exactly in control right now." He smirks and looks to me.

"Oh and Taylor says hi." He laughs after he finishes his sentence and I look at him in disgust. I knew we shouldn't of let him back in camp.

"Don't hurt her, Murphy. Come on, you want to hurt me, not them." I'm confused as to where he's going with this but I let it pan out.

"So what do you say? How about you trade them for me?" Bellamy asks and I shake my head and start yelling no but it turns out all muffled.

"Taylor doesn't like that plan too much." Murphy laughs.

"Murphy." Bellamy warns and Murphy sighs.

"How?"

"Simple. You open the door, I walk in, they walk out." I continue to yell when I hear what Bellamy wants to do. Murphy will kill him, I can't let that happen.

"Okay, just you Bellamy, unarmed." Murphy pulls the lever to open the dropship. He grabs Jasper and brings him close to the entrance. He wasn't planning on letting me go.

"I'm here." Bellamy says just behind the tarp. Murphy then shoves Jasper through it and Bellamy comes into sight. He looks at me and back to Murphy who is closing the dropship doors.

"We had a deal." Bellamys glare hardens towards Murphy.

"Two for one wasn't working in my favor." Murphy shrugs and keeps the gun pointed at Bellamy.

"Okay, Murphy-" Bellamy gets interrupted by a shot going off. Murphy had fired a shot into the wall making me jump.

"Bellamy? Bellamy! Are you okay?" Octavia's voice comes through the walkie talkie in Murphy's hand.

"Want her to know you're alive? Start tying." He throws a rope of seatbelts down by Bellamys feet. Bellamy hesitates before bending down and starts tying.

"Just a misfire. Now stop worrying about me and get back to work, all of you And tell Raven to hurry her ass up." From that last sentence I knew they had a plan. And if Raven is behind it I know it's going to work, even though I hate her she's extremely smart.

"Alright, that's enough. Tie those two ends together." Murphy tells Bellamy. I try to slip my hands free but the seatbelt is wrapped around my wrists extremely tight and I feel it cut into my skin when I struggle.

"Now get up and toss it over." Murphy points to a bar across the dropship. Bellamy did as he said. There was a hoop on the end of the rope. What's he planning on doing?

"What do you want me to say? You want me to apologize? I'm sorry." I can tell Bellamy is stalling, so far he's doing pretty good.

"You got it all wrong, Bellamy. I don't want you to say anything. I want you to feel what I felt, and then, then I want you to die." I shout at Murphy's words and I struggle to untie my arms again. Bellamy looks over to me, eyes sad.

"Guess the queen doesn't like that idea." Murphy laughs.

"Grab that crate." Murphy points to a crate by the table and Bellamy does setting it in front of him. "Now stand on it." Murphy demands, Bellamy swallow and stands on top of it. Oh my god. He wants to hang him.

Murphy grabs the other end of the seatbelts, "Put it over your neck." I immediately start screaming and tears began to fall down my cheeks. Bellamy looks to me with a pained expression on his face.

"Now." Murphy shoots a bullet into the wall again and Bellamy puts the hoop over his neck.

"Happy now?" Bellamy throws his hands up. Murphy pulls the seatbelts and it tightens around Bellamys neck causing him to stand on the tip of his toes. Bellamys hand quickly fly up to his neck to hold the belt from getting any tighter.

"No!" I scream into my mouth gag. I'm trying everything I can to get loose but nothing's working. Murphy looks to me and laughs.

"Man, you really got it bad for Bellamy, but all he wants to do is screw you." Murphy comes towards me and bends down. I glare at him. Bellamy isn't like that anymore.

"Poor, Queen, thought she had a chance with the king..." He walks over to Bellamy. Bellamy briefly holds my stare as tears flood my eyes from seeing the position he's in. He looks away when Murphy paces in front of him.

"You know I've got to hand it to you, Bellamy. You've got them all fooled. They actually look up to you, almost as much as they look up to Clarke or Taylor over here." Murphy points his gun at me and I glare at him with tears in my eyes.

"Yeah, well, we know the truth don't we? You are a coward. I learned that the day you kicked the crate from underneath me." Murphy explains.

"Isn't that what you said? That you were just giving the people what they wanted, right?"

"I should have stopped them."

Murphy points the gun at him, "It's a little too late for that now."

"You think they are just going to let you walk out of here?" Bellamy asks him.

"Well, I think Clarke is dead and your queen over here will be too and I know the king's about to die, so who's really gonna lead these people, huh? Me, that's who and yeah, maybe I'll have to kill your grounder-pounding little sister." Murphy doesn't get to finish what he's saying because Bellamy tries to kick at him. Murphy tightens the grip on the belts and Bellamy is barely touching the crate.

A scream from underneath us causes Murphy to stop.

"I'm guessing that's her right now." Murphy smirks and starts to shoot at the ground. After a couple of shots he realizes he's out of bullets and when Bellamy sees that he tries to get free. Before he could Murphy quickly kicks the crate from underneath him and Bellamy hangs there struggling to breathe. I let out a scream, my wrists were being cut into from the struggle I was having trying to get out of the ties. Seeing Bellamy hanging there and me tied up, I felt helpless and everything in my body screamed at the fact that I couldn't help him. I watched him struggle while my eyes were getting blurry from crying.

Murphy pushed Bellamys hands down but out of instinct Bellamy raised them to his neck, "Using your hands is a cheat, mine were bound, remember?" Bellamy was able to punch Murphy but that only made Murphy angrier. He hit Bellamy in the stomach with the gun and Bellamy stopped struggling.

No. No. No. No.

I screamed louder and tried to get up from the chair. All of a sudden the dropship doors are opening and I continue to scream so they can come in and help Bellamy. When Murphy sees the door opening he hurriedly climbs up the ladder to the second floor and closes it shut. I scream until Jasper finally walks in and sees Bellamy hanging. He quickly runs to him and lifts him up.

Octavia runs in after him, "Bell! Hold on!" She untied the belts and Bellamy drops to the floor. I get choked up again and close my eyes, and tilt my head back. He's okay.

"Taylor!" Miller comes to me and grabs his knife and cuts my ties from my wrists and ankles, I quickly yank the cloth in my mouth out and stand up and hug him.

"Murphy! Murphy! There's only one way out of this for you now!" I turn to my right to see Bellamy is already up and banging on the opening to the second floor.

He tries shoving himself against the opening but it won't budge. A loud explosion caused him to stop and all of a sudden smoke starts to seep from the upper level.

He quickly steps off the ladder and looks around. Finally his eyes land on me and I couldn't help it. I ran up to him and threw my arms around his shoulders making sure not to touch his neck. His arms wrap tightly around my back and I cry harder.

"Shh...I'm okay. We're okay." His voice is raspy from the hanging. I pull away and grab his face. I want to make sure he's really here.

"I thought you were going to die, there was nothing I could do. I-"

"I'm fine, princess." He pulls me into another hug and then pulls away.

"We're going after Monty, Finn, and Clarke. We don't abandon our own." Bellamy tells us and I smile. My Bellamy is back.

"Bellamy, I just. Thank you. Long way from _'whatever the hell you want._" Jasper says grabbing Bellamys shoulder. Bellamy nods and they all file out.

I step closer to Bellamy and my tears start to fall again.

"I'm glad you're okay." I choke out and he grabs my waist and brings me to his chest. I grip his shirt tight and sigh.

"I was so scared I was going to lose you." I whisper and he pulls back from the hug, hands still on my waist and chests still pressed together. He's looking right into my eyes in our new position.

"I'm not going anywhere, princess."

He moves a piece of hair away from my face and tucks it behind my ear. We stay silent, just staring. He's so close and I love the way he's holding me. I start to lean in at the same time he does. Our lips are almost touching, if I move forward I will kiss him. My heartbeat starts to increase as we stay in that position. My hand grips his shirt tighter.

"Bellamy." I whisper softly letting him know that I want him. He looks into my eyes once more before pressing his lips against mine. Flames quickly ignite in my chest making me go dizzy and I'm pulling him closer to me, chasing the feeling. His lips work smoothly with mine and I inhale taking in the kiss more urgently. His hands squeeze my waist and he pulls me closer but we're already pressed together. I open my mouth as I let his tongue in. I get dizzy again, but Bellamy is holding me up. He walks me backwards and my back hits the cold wall of the dropship.

"Bellamy." I say in between kisses, he takes this as an opportunity to go down to my neck since I'm speaking. He places a few kisses down my jaw and neck and then comes back up. He presses a light kiss to my lips once again and leans his forehead against mine.

"That was worth the wait." I whisper. Running my fingers through his hair. His thumbs are rubbing gently on the exposed skin on my hips where my shirt had drawn up.

"Worth every second." He says with a grin "Let's go get our people." I whisper and he nods backing away from me.

"It's Clarke and Finn! Open the gate!" My breath catches in my throat. They're here. Me and Bellamy share a look and walk outside to see its really true. There stands Clarke and Finn all banged up. We walk over to them.

"Thank god! Where's Monty?" I question them as soon as I stand in front of them.

"Montys gone?" My heart drops at Clarkes words. If they don't know where he is then he could be dead. I feel a hand on my shoulder and I turn to see Bellamy, "We'll find him." I nod and turn back to Clarke and Finn.

"Clarke, we need to leave now." Finn turns and looks at us, "All of us do. There's an army of grounders, unlike anything we've ever seen, coming for us right now. We need to pack what we can and run."

"Like hell we do. We knew this was coming." Bellamy states sternly.

"Bell, we're not prepared yet." Octavia calls to her brother.

"And they're not here yet, we still have time to get ready. Besides where would we go? Where would we be safer than behind these walls?" Bellamy throws out some pretty good questions. Finn decides to speak up about it, "There's an ocean to the east. People there will help us." How does he know? What people could help us?

Octavia comes forward and looks at Finn, "You saw Lincoln." So that's how he knows. Finn nods his head.

"You expect us to trust a grounder? This is our home now." Bellamy starts, "We built this from nothing with our bare hands! Our dead are buried behind that wall in this ground! Our ground! The grounders think they can take that away. They think that because we came from the sky, we don't belong here. But they're yet to realize one very important fact: We are on the ground now and that means we are grounders!" "Yeah!" Someone shouts, "Grounders with guns!"

"Damn right! I say let 'em come!" Bellamy yells with them. I smile lightly at his determination, he's right. Bellamys speech inspires me to speak up. After all I am a leader of this camp.

"Grounders wouldn't turn away and run from a war, they would see it through and fight. This is what we've been preparing for and now that it's here we have to face it. Now I'm ready, the questions is, are you?" Everyone cheers and I hear a chorus of 'yeah's'. I turn to look at Bellamy and he's smiling at me. I return it and I look over to Finn and Clarke.

They don't look too happy but Bellamy is right, we can't leave this place. It's home, it's more home than the ark ever was.

"They're right." Clarke cuts in after the crowd stopped cheering. I was taken aback at her words, Is she actually agreeing with us? "If we leave, we may never find a place as safe as this. And God knows in this world we could be faced with something even worse tomorrow. But that doesn't change the simple fact that if we stay here we will die tonight. So pack your things. Just take what you can carry, now." Everyone quickly walks away to get their things. Why is it up to Clarke? We were prepared enough for this battle and now we have to walk away.

"Raven!" Someone shouts and we turn to our left to see Raven stumbling from behind the dropship, we all run over towards her and Bellamy and Finn are the first to get to her.

"Get her in the dropship." Clarke says and Finn lifts her up and walks in. Before Clarke can go in after them Bellamy grabs her arm.

"Leaving here is a mistake." He warns.

"The decision has been made." She tells him sternly. She still doesn't understand that we can't just walk away from this, we need to fight.

"Crowds make bad decisions. Just ask Murphy. Leaders do what they think is right." Bellamy explains to her, he's breathing pretty heavily from the yelling and running.

"I am." She says and turns away and walks into the dropship.

Bellamy turns to me and I give him a sympathetic look.

"I know this is not how you wanted things to go. I'm sorry." I say walking closer to him.

"We shouldn't be walking away, not now." He sighs and looks away from me; his jaw tightening.

"Hey," I place my hand on his cheek and turn his face towards me. "I know that, but we can't stop them now. if you can't beat 'em, join 'em." I joke to lighten up the mood and his lips tug into a little smile.

"Now let's go check on Raven." What Raven did for me and Bellamy was amazing and I know I can't hate her forever. I start to go into the dropship but Bellamy grabs my hand and I turn and face him.

"Thanks." I smile at his words and give him a quick kiss on the cheek and turn around and walk in the dropship. Raven is lying on her back screaming in pain from the blazing orange blade that is pressed to her skin. Clarke pulls the knife away and the blood left on her skin sizzles. Ouch. Been there, done that.

"That should stop the external bleeding." Clarke sighs setting the knife down.

"I don't understand. How did Murphy get a gun?" Finn questions Bellamy; still clutching Ravens hand. Bellamy looks to me and then back to Finn, "Long story." Raven is panting still but she speaks, "We got lucky, if Murphy hit the fuel tank instead of me we would all be dead."

"Wait. There's rocket fuel down there?" Clarke asks the girl and Raven nods her head. "Enough to build a bomb?"

"Enough to build a hundred bombs." Raven sighs and continues, "If we had any gun powder left." I close my eyes and take a deep breath. There's always something.

"Let's get back to the reapers." Bellamy changes the subject, "Maybe they'll help us. The enemy of my enemy is my friend, right?"

Finn and Clarke share a look and look back to us.

"Not this enemy. We saw them, trust me, it's not an option." Clarke says making me wonder how bad they really are.

"We don't have time for this. Can she walk or not?" Finn points his question towards Clarke and she shakes her head.

"No, we have to carry her."

"The hell you will, I'm good to go."

She starts to sit up and my eyes widen and we all get closer to her to make sure nothing happens. This girl is tough i'll give her that. Clarke stops her from struggling to sit up and bends over, "Hey, listen to me. That bullet is still inside you, if by some miracle there's no internal bleeding it might hold until we get somewhere safe. But you are not walking there. Is that clear?" Clarke's voice is stern and authoritative. She sounds like her mother throwing around orders in the medical station back on the ark. She knows how to take charge and the right words to say. Raven doesn't look too happy with the decision but she nods her head and lays back down.

"I'll get the stretcher." Finn says hurriedly and starts to walk away until Bellamy speaks up. "Can't run away fast enough, huh? Real brave." Bellamy says glaring lightly at Finn. Finn walks back over, "Dying in a fight you can't win isn't brave Bellamy, it's stupid."

"Spoken like every coward who's ever run from a fight." Bellamy says getting in Finns face. I know the situation is tense and we have a lot to be thinking about right now but i'm not going to lie, Bellamy looks hot like this.

"Alright, that's enough." They don't stop the harsh glare they have on each other "It's time to go." Clarke tells them.

I shake my head, we shouldn't be running away. Warriors don't run away. Someone who use to mean a lot to me told me that.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter for this book but the sequel is up on my page and is added to the Queen Series! Enjoy this chapter and then head on over to part 2!

_"It's when you're acting selflessly that you are at your bravest._  
  
  


**17.**  
  
  
  


_"Come on, hit me." Jack encouraged me. I was hesitant about actually punching him, I don't know how much I'm packing but I don't want to hurt him. I've always loved training with him. It was fun and I know how to defend myself a little bit more than I use too. But this is the first time he's ever wanted me to actually fight him "Jack, I don't want too, what if I hurt you?" I whine. I wasn't being cocky, I never knew how hard I could punch. All I've ever punched were punching bags._

_"You won't, babe, now come on. Give me the best you got." He points to his cheek and I sigh. I lift my hands up like he showed me to do and tighten my fist. He nodded to me waiting for the punch. I quickly smash my fist into his cheek as hard as I could and he stumbles back and squeezes his eyes together shaking his head. "I'm sorry." I take his face into my hands and he laughs lightly. My hand ached a little but it wasn't too bad._

_"You got a mean right hook."_

_"Damn it, you're going to have a bruise there tomorrow." I sigh and touch his cheek lightly. He doesn't flinch but smiles._

_"Didn't you say it was hot the last time I had bruises.'" He teased grabbing my waist and planting a kiss on my lips. I roll my eyes at him and pull him in for another longer kiss. He smiles into the kiss and I can't help but do the same. We break away laughing and he kisses me one more time._

_"It is hot, but not if I'm the one giving them to you. Why do I need to hit someone anyways? Why not just walk away? I'm not a big fan of violence." He shakes his head at my words._

_"No, Taylor, You have to fight your battles, you can't just run from them. If you run you'll never learn. The battles you fight for yourself will be tough, but when you're fighting for the people you love it makes just a little more sense, and hurts a little less. Warriors don't give up or run when it gets tough. They face their battles head on. Don't run, fight."_

_"I'm not a warrior." I shake my head at him. "Yes you are, you just don't know it yet. But come on, I think my Queen needs a nap." He pulls me into his side and we walk out the door of the training room. "Yes I do, your place or mine?"_  
  
  
  
  
  


"If they follow, it's a hundred and twenty mile walk to the ocean." Bellamys words cut me out of my head.

"Look we're wasting time, if he want's to stay he can stay." Finn argues and storm out. What a jackass.

"We can't do this without you, Bellamy, without both of you!" She shakes her head at us pleadingly.

"What do you want us to say, Clarke?" Bellamy questions her.

"I want you to say you're with us, those kids out there listen to you guys." I shake my head disagreeing with her words.

"They're lining up to go, they listen to you more." I interrupt.

"I gave them an easy choice. But five minutes ago they were willing to fight and die for you both. You guys inspire them." Bellamy stays silent and Clarke speaks up again, "And I'm afraid we're going to need that again before this day is through." As soon as she finishes her sentence she turns around and walks out the dropship. Bellamy goes after her, l stay and turn to look at Raven. She still looks to be in a lot of pain and l feel like now might be the right time to apologize. "Hey, Raven, look I'm sorry for what I said about you and Finn. I was just angry at you." I sigh and look at her. She shakes her head and laughs lightly.

"No, don't apologize. I deserved it, l'm sorry for everything. For everything said and for electrocuting you." She says making me smile lightly.

"I'm sorry for what you saw in his tent. I was hurt about Finn and Clarke which is no excuse for me to behave that way. I just didn't know what else to do. But you should know he turned me down right away. And I know it's because of you." Her words catch me off guard, l know Bellamy told her no but she thinks it's because of me. But we weren't even together. Are we even together now? Once again, this is the wrong time to be thinking about my feelings when there is a huge grounder army out there trying to kill us. "Ready to go?" Finn comes in with Jake and a makeshift stretcher in his hands. Raven nods her head and I help them transfer her from the table to the stretcher. We head out of the dropship and I notice everyone is heading out already. Bellamy stands by the fire that is still lit in front of us and I walk towards him.

"You did good here, Bellamy." I place my hand on his shoulder and he looks to me.

"Eighteen dead." He says but I reply quickly, "Eighty-two alive. You did good." He nods and grabs a bucket near me and dumps it onto the flames. They quickly sizzle out and smoke rises. He throws the bucket down and grabs my hand as we walk out of the camp we called home.

Me and Bellamy were at the back of the line making sure no one gets left behind until everyone came to a stop. We quickly let go of each others hands and grab our guns. From what I gathered Octavia was at the front of the line so if she thinks there's reason to stop than there's probably most definitely a reason to stop.

We hear a couple of shouts and then I hear Jasper yell, "Grounders!" My eyes widen as everyone turns around and starts running back towards camp. Me and Bellamy run with them all and make it back inside the camp. Once everyone was in we close the fence.

I hope up on the lookout platform and Bellamy follows after, he points his gun out while we look.

"Where are they? Why aren't they attacking?" Bellamy questions.

"Cause we're doing exactly what they wanted us to do." I say, realizing the grounders plan.

"What are you talking about?" He looks at me. I turn around and see Clarke and Finn looking up at us.

"Lincoln said the scouts would be the first to arrive." I exclaim out of breath.

"If it's just scouts we can fight our way out." Octavia says to me, "That's what Lincoln would do." Bellamy jumps down from the platform and speaks.

"We're done doing what that grounder would do. We tried it and now Drew is dead." He points to Drew whose body is laying on the ground with his face covered by a jacket, "You wanna be next?" He questions her rhetorically.

"That grounder saved our lives. I agree with Octavia, for all we know there's one scout out there." Finn cuts in.

"A scout with insanely good aim." Jasper speaks from the platform next to the one I'm on.

"I agree with Bellamy, we have to look at this a different way." I say to Finn and Octavia. Finn rolls his eyes at me.

"You only agree with him because you guys are screwing." I jump down off the platform and make my way toward him getting ready to punch him in the face when Clarke holds me back.

"Stop. The grounders are the real enemy." She tells me and I push my arms off of her, still sending glares towards Finn. What a jackass, he's just mad because he wanted to get out of this without lifting a finger. Screw him.

"Clarke, Taylor. We can still do this." Octavia says to us. Me and Clarke share a look. She already knows where I stand.

"What's it going to be guys? Run and get picked off out in the open, or stand and fight back?" Bellamy asks us and I sigh.

"We stay." I speak up and get off the platform.

"We stay." Clarke follows my lead.

"Clarke, if we're still here when Tristan gets here..." Finn trails off and shakes his head. Who is Tristian? We don't have time to be discussing this any further.

"Lincoln said scouts, more than one. He said, "get home before the scouts arrive. " Finn, they're already here." Clarke tells him and I nod.

"Looks like you got your fight." I tell Bellamy and he nods and turns to the crowd.

"Okay, this is what we have been preparing for. Kill them before they kill us. Gunners, to your posts. Use the tunnels to get in and out. From now on the gate stays closed." Bellamy orders and everyone starts rushing around.

Octavia starts walking away getting her sword out. Bellamy runs to catch up with her. I go into the dropship where Clarke and Finn were. They were talking with Raven and soon Bellamy joined us.

"We've got 25 rifles with 20 rounds each, give or take. Roughly 500 rounds of ammo. While you two were gone, we made some improvements. Thanks to Raven, the gully is mined." Bellamy speaks up and we listen.

"Partially mined. Thanks to Murphy." Raven lets out, I can tell she's still in a lot of pain.

"Still, it's the main route in. If the grounders use it, we'll know. She also built grenades." Bellamy holds up a silver one.

"It's not many." Clarke sighs.

"Again, thank you, Murphy." Raven huffs. I shake my head,

"It's something." I say, Clarke is being a downer just because her original plan backfired.

"We'll make them count. If the grounders make it through the front gate, guns and grenades should force them back." Bellamy's plan isn't too solid but it works.

"And then?" Clarke asks. No one says anything until Raven decides to speak up, "Then we close the door and pray."

"And pray what? That the ship keeps them out? Because it won't." Clarke interrupts.

"Then lets not let them get through the gate." Bellamy tells her and lifts the walkie talkie to his mouth.

"All foxholes, listen up. Keep your eyes and ears open. Inflict casualties, as many as possible. You can hold them off long enough to make them turn back. That's the plan."

"That's always your plan. Just like the bomb at the bridge." Finn glares at Bellamy. Are they ever going to stop fighting?

"Damn right." Bellamy says which makes me smile a little.

"You got a better idea?" Bellamy points his question toward Finn.

"It can't be that simple." Clarke shakes her head looking at our make shift map, "You said there's fuel in those rockets, right? Enough to build 100 bombs."

"I also said we got no gunpowder left." Raven huffs.

"I don't want to build a bomb, I want to blast off."

"Draw them in close. Fire the rockets. A ring of fire." Raven nods her head at the plan. Holy shit.

"Barbecue grounders, I like it." Bellamy nods in approval. This is probably the best idea Clarke has had since we've been down here.

"Will it work?" Finn asks Raven.

"The wiring's a mess down there, but yeah. You give me enough time, I'll cook them real good."

"Then it's settled, we will hold them off long enough for you to do what you have to do then we will light 'em up." I say and nod towards Raven. I walk out of the dropship getting my gun ready. I make my way over to the tunnels but a hand grabs my wrist and stops me. I turn around and see Bellamy.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm not just going to sit here and do nothing. I need to be out there with the gunners. I'm a good shot." I explain to him.

"It's dangerous." Bellamy sighs. I smirk.

"Dangerous is my middle name, baby." I lean up and give him a quick kiss on the cheek and start to walk away.

"What is your real middle name?" He calls out to me and I turn around while walking backwards. He has a light smile playing on his lips.

"I'll tell you when all of this is over." I turn back around and head into the tunnels, once I get out I see Octavia and Miller.

"Hey guys, I came to join the party." I smile as they jump.

"Damn it, Queen, you scared the shit out of me." Miller says and I laugh. I join them on the platform and look out with them.

"I'm surprised my brother let you out." Octavia smirks. I scoff, "I'm not a dog."

"I don't know, you kind of are a bitch." Miller jokes and I smack him on the head while Octavia laughs.

We stay watching for a little while longer till Octavia starts to get off the platform.

"What are you doing?" I ask her.

"I have to go out there, if I can take some of them out before they get here we don't have to waste our bullets." Octavia says as she starts to walk through another tunnel that leads out of camp.

"Wait, I'm coming with you." I jump down off the platform and follow her. She doesn't argue which I am thankful for. I want to watch her back, I can't imagine anything happening to her. What would Bellamy do with himself?

"Where are you guys going?" Miller questions us.

"On a field trip, don't die before I get back." I smile at him and he shakes his head.

I follow Octavia through and we stay crouched down when we get out. It's night time but who knows if grounders just saw us come out. We don't say anything and I just follow her farther out. All of a sudden we hear drums, Lincoln told us they are war drums. Me and Octavia stop.

"Did you hear that?" Octavia whisper so quietly I barely hear it.

"The loud ass drums playing thought the woods? No, I didn't." I reply sarcastically. I get sassy when I'm nervous.

"No, I-" Octavia didn't get to finish because a snap was heard from behind us. I shut my eyes tightly and sigh.

"There's a grounder right behind us isn't there?" I whisper to Octavia even though it's pointless now.

She nods and I quickly turn around and hold my gun up. He quickly pushes me to the ground and hits me in the head. He gets on top and of me and tries choking me. I'm trying to hit his face but the lack of oxygen makes me weak. Where the hell is Octavia? He's squeezing harder and I'm now shaking. Before I could pass out he gets a sword through the back and he stops and falls on top of me. I see that it was Octavia. She pushes him off of me and helps me up. All of a sudden we hear lots of guns going off. Looks like they are here.

"Are you okay?" She huffs.

"Yeah, let's do it again, shall we?" I choke out. My throat hurts and I know my voice sounds hoarse. I cough a couple times and clear my throat before I'm good to go.

"You're crazy, let's go." She walks forward and I follow rubbing my neck softly.

"Wait." I pull her behind a tree with me when I see four grounders coming our way.

"There's four of them." I whisper and she takes a peek. They are spread apart, there's 2 to the right and 2 to the left.

"You get the two on the right, I'll get the two on the left." She whispers and I nod and quietly make my way towards them making sure to hide behind the trees. Once the two pass me I run towards one of them and get on his back, quickly slicing my knife across his throat. He falls forward and I fall with him alerting his partner two feet away. The other grounder comes at me with a sword and slashes it across my leg and I fall to the floor. I yell from the pain but push through and grab the gun out of my belt. I didn't want to use it in case it gives Octavia away or alerts other grounders but seeing as I can hear shouting and guns still going off it looks like i'm okay. I take the gun out and point it towards his head and pull the trigger.

He falls to the side and drops the sword.

I pick it up and wave it around getting a feel for it. I could handle it. I take off his holster for it and slide it over my back and adjust it to my size and head over to where Octavia was. She looked to be in the same predicament as me, she had a grounder holding the handle of the axe to her throat trying to choke her. I run towards them and in one swift motion I stab him through the back and kick him off of her. He chokes on his blood for a couple of seconds and then he stops breathing.

I try not to think much about killing them, if I don't kill them they will kill me. It still weighs heavy on me, it's the same feeling I have had since I killed the two guard back on the ark. I push the feeling away like I always do and look to Octavia.

"Thanks." She breaths out and gets up.

"You save my life, I save yours." I shrug and she lets out a small laugh.

"Where'd you get the sword?" She points to it in my hand.

"I borrowed it from a grounder. You can't be the only samurai around here." I smile at her and she shakes her head.

"The shots stopped, we need to go back." Octavia says and I nod agreeing. I feel a pain in my leg as we walk and I look down to see my right leg was still bleeding from the cut. I walk back to the grouder and rip a piece of his shirt and wrap it tightly around the cut to prevent it from bleeding anymore. My jeans and the darkness aren't allowing me to see it clearly so I'm not sure if it's really deep to where I need to be concerned. I don't think it's a problem because it isn't gushing blood so that's a good sign.

"You good?" Octavia questions and I nod, "Yeah, we need to go." I huff and we continue walking until we reach camp. We're far away but we can see all the grounders climbing over the walls and we see fire.

"They need help." I take off running, but still making sure I'm hiding myself. I hear Octavia right behind me and we run through the fox hole. No ones on guard anymore and there's some guns lying on the floor and I check them. They're out of ammo.

"This was their plan all along, make us use all our ammo and fight hand to hand. They are better at it."I explain to Octavia. We hear lots of shouting and we quickly run into the fox hole to the other post. Grounders are attacking Miller and Bellamy. Octavia goes to help Bellamy while I run to Miller and slice the sword through the grounders stomach and then I plunge it into the other grounder trying to choke Miller. I turn around to see Octavia kill the grounder on top of Bellamy.

"Admit it, you want one." She tells Bellamy as she helps him get up. There's arrows flying everywhere and I duck down to avoid them. One manages to hit Octavia in the leg.

"No! You're hit! Miller, fall back, now. Can you walk? O." Bellamy yells over the yelling and commotion going on. She nods her head and tries to stand up but she can't.

"Hey, hold onto me. Let me get you behind that wall." He says and puts her arm over his neck and picks her up.

Me and Miller follow in suite through the woods but we stop when we see the grounders and what appears to be the reapers fighting each other. I guess the enemy of my enemy really is my friend. Bellamy sets Octavia down and looks around.

"While they're distracted lets move." He says and Octavia shakes her head.

"We'll never make it. Leave me, I'll find another way." She says but I know that's not an option for Bellamy. Even if it was it's not an option for me. We can't leave her behind. Like Bellamy said, we don't abandon our own.

"I'm not going anywhere without you." He tells her.

"Octavia." I hold up my sword to the voice and then lower when I realize it's Lincoln. He crouches by them and I notice Bellamy tense up. He still isn't Lincoln's biggest fan.

"You did this?" Bellamy nods towards the grounders and reapers and Lincoln nods, "With Finn."

He looks down at her wound and touches around it.

"It's deep, I can help you but you have to come with me now." Lincoln offers, I can see Bellamy contemplating it but there's no other way out for Octavia.

"Go, let him help you." Bellamy nods at her.

"No way, I have to see this through." She huffs.

"You can't walk and I can't get you back to the drop ship." Bellamy explains to her.

"He's right, your fight is over." Lincoln says.

"So is yours." Bellamy says while looking toward me.

"What are you talking about?" I question him.

"You're going with them." He states. He's lost it, there's no reason to go with them when I can fight. We need all the people we can get, plus I got a cool sword that I need to use.

"The hell I am, I'm just getting started." He sighs and exchanges a few words with Octavia and Lincoln picks her up but he doesn't walk away. Bellamy walks up to me and grabs my face into his hands.

"Please, princess, I can't lose you." He whispers. I cover his hand with mine.

"You won't, but I'm not going anywhere. I'm not just going to walk away from this, Bellamy. I'm not going to walk away from you, that's final." I shake my head, he looks at me for a few seconds and nods.

"Go on, keep her safe." He says to Lincoln. He nods and walks away carrying Octavia in his arms.

"Let's get back." Bellamy says to me and Miller and we follow his lead. We make it to the foxhole and go through it. Once we get inside I take a look around. It's chaos, our people are killing grounders and I see some grounders killing our own. I quickly go up to a grounder who's about to swing his axe at Jake and I plunge my knife through his back and he falls.

"Get to the dropship." I tell him. He nods and gets off the ground and runs towards the drop ship. I see more of them climbing over the fence and one is charging right at me. I quickly bring my knife out and slice him across the legs making him fall and then I push the knife through his chest and pull out. He plops to the ground and I turn around, most everyone is inside the dropship now.

I turn back around and a grounder is about to swing his stick at me but I duck. He kicks me onto the ground and brings his stick to my throat and starts to press down making it hard to breathe. What is with them and choking people. I push back the stick with all my power but he won't let up. I reach for my knife but it's too far away.

"Close the door!" I hear Miller shout. I know they are about to fire up the ship, I keep trying to reach for the knife but I can't reach it. Before I can try anything else the grounder coughs up blood. I look down and see a sword through his chest. He rolls over and off of me and I look up to see a grounder. Why did he help me?

"Lincoln sent me, let's go." I hear the ship starting to rumble and we take off running toward the foxhole. We get in but I turn around to see Bellamy and Finn still fighting a grounder.

"No! Bellamy!" I scream, I try to go back but the grounder pulls me back and struggles to pull me through the hole. I can't see Bellamy anymore as we make it out when the dropship blasts off making the woods light up in an orange glow.

"No!" I scream and tears fall down my face. I drop to my knees and start sobbing. He can't be dead, he can't be. But the other part of my brain knows that there's no way he could've gotten out of the blast quickly, he was right by the dropship.

"We have to go, now." The grounder tells me but I don't get up. I feel arms under my knees and one on my back and before I know it he's carrying me. I don't say anything and I let him. Before I knew it, I had cried myself to sleep thinking about Bellamy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that was a wild ride.


End file.
